Darrowhadalreadyguessedhertobeapersonwhowouldinstinctivelyopposeanysuggestedchanges,andthen,afteronehadexhaustedone’smainarguments,unexpectedlyyieldtosomesmallincidentalreason,andadheredoggedlytohernewposition。Sheboastedofherold—fashionedprejudices,talkedagooddealofbeingagrandmother,andmadeashowofreachinguptotapOwen’sshoulder,thoughhisheightwaslittlemorethanhers。
ShewasfullofasmallpaleprattleaboutthepeopleshehadseenatOuchy,astowhomshehadtheminutestatisticalinformationofagazetteer,withoutanyapparentsenseofpersonaldifferences。ShesaidtoDarrow:\"TheytellmethingsareverymuchchangedinAmerica……OfcourseinmyyouththereWASaSociety\"……Shehadnodesiretoreturnthereshewassurethestandardsmustbesodifferent。
\"Therearecharmingpeopleeverywhere……andonemustalwayslookonthebestside……butwhenonehaslivedamongTraditionsit’sdifficulttoadaptone’sselftothenewideas……Thesedreadfulviewsofmarriage……it’ssohardtoexplainthemtomyFrenchrelations……I’mthankfultosayI
don’tpretendtounderstandthemmyself!ButYOU’REanEverard——ItoldAnnalastspringinLondonthatoneseesthatinstantly\"……
ShewanderedofftothecookingandtheserviceofthehotelatOuchy。Sheattachedgreatimportancetogastronomicdetailsandtothemannersofhotelservants。There,too,therewasafallingoff,shesaid。\"Idontknow,ofcourse;butpeoplesayit’sowingtotheAmericans。
Certainlymywaiterhadawayofslappingdownthedishes……theytellmethatmanyofthemareAnarchists……belongtoUnions,youknow。\"SheappealedtoDarrow’sreportedknowledgeofeconomicconditionstoconfirmthisominousrumour。
AfterdinnerOwenLeathwanderedintothenextroom,wherethepianostood,andbegantoplayamongtheshadows。Hisstep—motherpresentlyjoinedhim,andDarrowsatalonewithMadamedeChantelle。
Shetookupthethreadofhermildchatandcarrieditonatthesamepaceasherknitting。Herconversationresembledthelargeloose—strandedwebbetweenherfingers:nowandthenshedroppedastitch,andwentonregardlessofthegapinthepattern。
Darrowlistenedwithalazysenseofwell—being。Inthementallulloftheafter—dinnerhour,withharmoniousmemoriesmurmuringthroughhismind,andthesofttintsandshadowyspacesofthefineoldroomcharminghiseyestoindolence,MadamedeChantelle’sdiscourseseemednotoutofplace。Hecouldunderstandthat,inthelongrun,theatmosphereofGivremightbesuffocating;butinhispresentmooditsverylimitationshadagrace。
Presentlyhefoundthechancetosayawordinhisownbehalf;andthereuponmeasuredtheadvantage,neverbeforeparticularlyapparenttohim,ofbeingrelatedtotheEverardsofAlbany。MadamedeChantelle’sconceptionofhernativecountry——towhichshehadnotreturnedsincehertwentiethyear——remindedhimofanancientgeographer’smapoftheHyperboreanregions。Itwasallafoggyblank,fromwhichonlyoneortwofixedoutlinesemerged;andoneofthesebelongedtotheEverardsofAlbany。
Thefactthattheyofferedsuchfirmfooting——formed,sotospeak,afriendlyterritoryonwhichtheopposingpowerscouldmeetandtreat——helpedhimthroughthetaskofexplainingandjustifyinghimselfasthesuccessorofFraserLeath。MadamedeChantellecouldnotresistsuchincontestableclaims。Sheseemedtofeelherson’shoveringanddiscriminatingpresence,andshegaveDarrowthesensethathewasbeingtestedandapprovedasalastadditiontotheLeathCollection。
Shealsomadehimawareoftheimmenseadvantagehepossessedinbelongingtothediplomaticprofession。ShespokeofthishumdrumcallingasaCareer,andgaveDarrowtounderstandthatshesupposedhimtohavebeenseducingDuchesseswhenhewasnotnegotiatingTreaties。Heheardagainquaintphraseswhichromanticoldladieshadusedinhisyouth:\"Brilliantdiplomaticsociety……socialadvantages……theentreeeverywhere……nothingelseFORMSayoungmaninthesameway……\"andshesighinglyaddedthatshecouldhavewishedhergrandsonhadchosenthesamepathtoglory。
Darrowprudentlysuppressedhisownviewoftheprofession,aswellasthefactthathehadadopteditprovisionally,andforreasonslesssocialthansociological;andthetalkpresentlypassedontothesubjectofhisfutureplans。
Hereagain,MadamedeChantelle’saweoftheCareermadeheradmitthenecessityofAnna’sconsentingtoanearlymarriage。ThefactthatDarrowwas\"ordered\"toSouthAmericaseemedtoputhimintheromanticlightofayoungsoldierchargedtoleadaforlornhope:shesighedandsaid:
\"Atsuchmomentsawife’sdutyisatherhusband’sside。\"
TheproblemofEffie’sfuturemighthavedisturbedher,sheadded;butsinceAnna,foratime,consentedtoleavethelittlegirlwithher,thatproblemwasatanyratedeferred。
Shespokeplaintivelyoftheresponsibilityoflookingafterhergranddaughter,butDarrowdivinedthatsheenjoyedtheflavourofthewordmorethanshefelttheweightofthefact。
\"Effie’saperfectchild。She’smorelikemyson,perhaps,thandearOwen。She’llneverintentionallygivemetheleasttrouble。Butofcoursetheresponsibilitywillbegreat……I’mnotsureIshoulddaretoundertakeitifitwerenotforherhavingsuchatreasureofagoverness。HasAnnatoldyouaboutourlittlegoverness?Afteralltheworrywehadlastyear,withoneimpossiblecreatureafteranother,itseemsprovidential,justnow,tohavefoundher。
Atfirstwewereafraidshewastooyoung;butnowwe’vethegreatestconfidenceinher。Socleverandamusing——andSUCHalady!Idon’tsayhereducation’sallitmightbe……nodrawingorsinging……butonecan’thaveeverything;
andshespeaksItalian……\"
MadamedeChantelle’sfondinsistenceonthelikenessbetweenEffieLeathandherfather,ifnotparticularlygratifyingtoDarrow,hadatleastincreasedhisdesiretoseethelittlegirl。ItgavehimanoddfeelingofdiscomforttothinkthatsheshouldhaveanyofthecharacteristicsofthelateFraserLeath:hehad,somehow,fantasticallypicturedherasthemysticaloffspringoftheearlytendernessbetweenhimselfandAnnaSummers。
HisencounterwithEffietookplacethenextmorning,onthelawnbelowtheterrace,wherehefoundher,intheearlysunshine,knockingaboutgolfballswithherbrother。
Almostatonce,andwithinfiniterelief,hesawthattheresemblanceofwhichMadamedeChantelleboastedwasmainlyexternal。Eventhatdiscoverywasslightlydistasteful,thoughDarrowwasforcedtoownthatFraserLeath’sstraight—featuredfairnesshadlentitselftotheproductionofapeculiarlyfinishedimageofchildishpurity。ButitwasevidentthatotherelementshadalsogonetothemakingofEffie,andthatanotherspiritsatinhereyes。Herserioushandshake,her\"pretty\"greeting,wereworthyoftheLeathtradition,andheguessedhertobemoremalleablethanOwen,moresubjecttotheinfluencesofGivre;buttheshoutwithwhichshereturnedtoherromphadinitthenoteofhermother’semancipation。
Hehadbeggedaholidayforher,andwhenMrs。Leathappearedheandsheandthelittlegirlwentoffforaramble。AnnawishedherdaughtertohavetimetomakefriendswithDarrowbeforelearninginwhatrelationhewastostandtoher;andthethreeroamedthewoodsandfieldstillthedistantchimeofthestable—clockmadethemturnbackforluncheon。
Effie,whowasattendedbyashaggyterrier,hadpickeduptwoorthreesubordinatedogsatthestable;andasshetrottedonaheadwithheryappingescort,AnnahungbacktothrowalookatDarrow。
\"Yes,\"heansweredit,\"she’sexquisite……Oh,IseewhatI’maskingofyou!Butshe’llbequitehappyhere,won’tshe?
Andyoumustrememberitwon’tbeforlong……\"
Annasighedheracquiescence。\"Oh,she’llbehappyhere。
It’shernaturetobehappy。She’llapplyherselftoit,conscientiously,asshedoestoherlessons,andtowhatshecalls’beinggood’……Inaway,yousee,that’sjustwhatworriesme。Herideaof’beinggood’istopleasethepersonshe’swith——sheputsherwholedearlittlemindonit!Andso,ifevershe’swiththewrongperson————\"
\"Butsurelythere’snodangerofthatjustnow?MadamedeChantelletellsmethatyou’veatlastputyourhandonaperfectgoverness————\"
Anna,withoutanswering,glancedawayfromhimtowardherdaughter。
\"It’slucky,atanyrate,\"Darrowcontinued,\"thatMadamedeChantellethinksherso。\"
\"Oh,Ithinkveryhighlyofhertoo。\"
\"HighlyenoughtofeelquitesatisfiedtoleaveherwithEffie?\"
\"Yes。She’sjustthepersonforEffie。Only,ofcourse,oneneverknows……She’syoung,andshemighttakeitintoherheadtoleaveus……\"Afterapausesheadded:\"I’mnaturallyanxioustoknowwhatyouthinkofher。\"
Whentheyenteredthehousethehandsofthehallclockstoodwithinafewminutesoftheluncheonhour。AnnaledEffieofftohaveherhairsmoothedandDarrowwanderedintotheoaksitting—room,whichhefounduntenanted。Thesunlaypleasantlyonitsbrownwalls,onthescatteredbooksandtheflowersinoldporcelainvases。Inhiseyeslingeredthevisionofthedark—hairedmothermountingthestairswithherlittlefairdaughter。Thecontrastbetweenthemseemedalasttouchofgraceinthecomplexharmonyofthings。Hestoodinthewindow,lookingoutatthepark,andbroodinginwardlyuponhishappiness……
HewasrousedbyEffie’svoiceandthescamperofherfeetdownthelongfloorsbehindhim。
\"Hereheis!Hereheis!\"shecried,flyingoverthethreshold。
Heturnedandstoopedtoherwithasmile,andasshecaughthishandheperceivedthatshewastryingtodrawhimtowardsomeonewhohadpausedbehindherinthedoorway,andwhomhesupposedtobehermother。
\"HEREheis!\"Effierepeated,withhersweetimpatience。
ThefigureinthedoorwaycameforwardandDarrow,lookingup,foundhimselffacetofacewithSophyViner。Theystoodstill,ayardortwoapart,andlookedateachotherwithoutspeaking。
Astheypausedthere,ashadowfellacrossoneoftheterracewindows,andOwenLeathsteppedwhistlingintotheroom。Inhisroughshootingclothes,withtheglowofexerciseunderhisfairskin,helookedextraordinarilylight—heartedandhappy。Darrow,withaquickside—glance,noticedthis,andperceivedalsothattheglowontheyouth’scheekhaddeepenedsuddenlytored。Hetoostoppedshort,andthethreestoodtheremotionlessforabarelyperceptiblebeatoftime。Duringitslapse,Darrow’seyeshadturnedbackfromOwen’sfacetothatofthegirlbetweenthem。Hehadthesensethat,whateverwasdone,itwashewhomustdoit,andthatitmustbedoneimmediately。Hewentforwardandheldouthishand。
\"Howdoyoudo,MissViner?\"
Sheanswered:\"Howdoyoudo?\"inavoicethatsoundedclearandnatural;andthenextmomentheagainbecameawareofstepsbehindhim,andknewthatMrs。Leathwasintheroom。
TohisstrainedsensesthereseemedtobeanotherjustmeasurablepausebeforeAnnasaid,lookinggailyaboutthelittlegroup:\"HasOwenintroducedyou?ThisisEffie’sfriend,MissViner。\"
Effie,stillhangingonhergoverness’sarm,pressedherselfcloserwithalittlegestureofappropriation;andMissVinerlaidherhandonherpupil’shair。
DarrowfeltthatAnna’seyeshadturnedtohim。
\"IthinkMissVinerandIhavemetalready——severalyearsagoinLondon。\"
\"Iremember,\"saidSophyViner,inthesameclearvoice。
\"Howcharming!Thenwe’reallfriends。Butluncheonmustbeready,\"saidMrs。Leath。
Sheturnedbacktothedoor,andthelittleprocessionmoveddownthetwolongdrawing—rooms,withEffiewaltzingonahead。
XV
MadamedeChantelleandAnnahadplanned,fortheafternoon,avisittoaremotelysituatedacquaintancewhomtheintroductionofthemotorhadtransformedintoaneighbour。
Effiewastopayforhermorning’sholidaybyanhourortwointheschool—room,andOwensuggestedthatheandDarrowshouldbetakethemselvestoadistantcovertinthedesultoryquestforpheasants。
Darrowwasnotanardentsportsman,butanypretextforphysicalactivitywouldhavebeenacceptableatthemoment;
andhewasgladbothtogetawayfromthehouseandnottobelefttohimself。
Whenhecamedownstairsthemotorwasatthedoor,andAnnastoodbeforethehallmirror,swathingherhatinveils。
Sheturnedatthesoundofhisstepandsmiledathimforalongfullmoment。
\"I’dnoideayouknewMissViner,\"shesaid,ashehelpedherintoherlongcoat。
\"Itcamebacktome,luckily,thatI’dseenhertwoorthreetimesinLondon,severalyearsago。Shewassecretary,orsomethingofthesort,inthebackgroundofahousewhereI
usedtodine。\"
Heloathedtheslightingindifferenceofthephrase,buthehaduttereditdeliberately,hadbeensecretlypractisingitallthroughtheinterminablehourattheluncheon—table。
Nowthatitwasspoken,heshiveredatitsnoteofcondescension。Insuchcasesonewasalmostsuretooverdo……ButAnnaseemedtonoticenothingunusual。
\"Wasshereally?Youmusttellmeallaboutit——tellmeexactlyhowshestruckyou。I’msogladitturnsoutthatyouknowher。\"
\"’Know’isratherexaggerated:weusedtopasseachotheronthestairs。\"
MadamedeChantelleandOwenappearedtogetherashespoke,andAnna,gatheringupherwraps,said:\"You’lltellmeaboutthat,then。Tryandremembereverythingyoucan。\"
Ashetrampedthroughthewoodsathisyounghost’sside,Darrowfeltthepartialrelieffromthoughtproducedbyexerciseandtheobligationtotalk。Littleashecaredforshooting,hehadthehabitofconcentrationwhichmakesitnaturalforamantothrowhimselfwhollyintowhateverbusinesshehasinhand,andthereweremomentsoftheafternoonwhenasuddenwhirrintheundergrowth,avividergleamagainstthehazybrownsandgreysofthewoods,wasenoughtofilltheforegroundofhisattention。Butallthewhile,behindthesevoluntarilyemphasizedsensations,hissecretconsciousnesscontinuedtorevolveonaloudwheelofthought。Foratimeitseemedtobesweepinghimthroughdeepgulfsofdarkness。Hissensationsweretooswiftandswarmingtobedisentangled。Hehadanalmostphysicalsenseofstrugglingforair,ofbattlinghelplesslywithmaterialobstructions,asthoughtherussetcovertthroughwhichhetrudgedweretheheartofamaleficentjungle……
Snatchesofhiscompanion’stalkdriftedtohimintermittentlythroughtheconfusionofhisthoughts。Hecaughteagerself—revealingphrases,andunderstoodthatOwenwassayingthingsabouthimself,perhapshintingindirectlyatthehopesforwhichDarrowhadbeenpreparedbyAnna’sconfidences。Hehadalreadybecomeawarethattheladlikedhim,andhadmeanttotakethefirstopportunityofshowingthathereciprocatedthefeeling。ButtheeffortoffixinghisattentiononOwen’swordswassogreatthatitleftnopowerformorethanthebriefestandmostinexpressivereplies。
YoungLeath,itappeared,feltthathehadreachedaturning—pointinhiscareer,aheightfromwhichhecouldimpartiallysurveyhispastprogressandprojectedendeavour。Atonetimehehadhadmusicalandliteraryyearnings,visionsofdesultoryartisticindulgence;butthesehadoflatebeensupersededbytheresolutedeterminationtoplungeintopracticallife。
\"Idon’twant,yousee,\"Darrowheardhimexplaining,\"todriftintowhatmygrandmother,poordear,istryingtomakeofme:anadjunctofGivre。Idon’twant——hangitall!——toslipintocollectingsensationsasmyfathercollectedsnuff—boxes。IwantEffietohaveGivre——it’smygrandmother’s,youknow,todoasshelikeswith;andI’veunderstoodlatelythatifitbelongedtomeitwouldgraduallygobblemeup。Iwanttogetoutofit,intoalifethat’sbiganduglyandstruggling。IfIcanextractbeautyoutofTHAT,somuchthebetter:that’llprovemyvocation。ButIwanttoMAKEbeauty,notbedrownedintheready—made,likeabeeinapotofhoney。\"
Darrowknewthathewasbeingappealedtoforcorroborationoftheseviewsandforencouragementinthecoursetowhichtheypointed。Tohisownearshisanswerssoundednowcurt,nowirrelevant:atonemomentheseemedchillinglyindifferent,atanotherheheardhimselflaunchingoutonafloodofhazydiscursiveness。HedarednotlookatOwen,forfearofdetectingthelad’ssurpriseatthesesenselesstransitions。Andthroughtheconfusionofhisinwardstrugglesandoutwardloquacityheheardtheceaselesstrip—
hammerbeatofthequestion:\"WhatinGod’snameshallI
do?\"……
TogetbacktothehousebeforeAnna’sreturnseemedhismostpressingnecessity。Hedidnotclearlyknowwhy:hesimplyfeltthatheoughttobethere。AtonemomentitoccurredtohimthatMissVinermightwanttospeaktohimalone——andagain,inthesameflash,thatitwouldprobablybethelastthingshewouldwant……Atanyrate,hefeltheoughttotrytospeaktoHER;oratleastbepreparedtodoso,ifthechanceshouldoccur……
Finally,towardfour,hetoldhiscompanionthathehadsomelettersonhismindandmustgetbacktothehouseanddespatchthembeforetheladiesreturned。HeleftOwenwiththebeaterandwalkedontotheedgeofthecovert。Attheparkgateshestruckobliquelythroughthetrees,followingagrassavenueattheendofwhichhehadcaughtaglimpseoftheroofofthechapel。Agreyhazehadblottedoutthesunandthestillairclungabouthimtepidly。Atlengththehouse—frontraisedbeforehimitsexpanseofdamp—
silveredbrick,andhewasstruckafreshbythehighdecorumofitscalmlinesandsoberlymassedsurfaces。Itmadehimfeel,intheturbidcoilofhisfearsandpassions,likeamuddytrampforcinghiswayintosomepuresequesteredshrine……
Byandbye,heknew,heshouldhavetothinkthecomplexhorrorout,slowly,systematically,bitbybit;butforthemomentitwaswhirlinghimaboutsofastthathecouldjustclutchatitssharpspikesandbetossedoffagain。Onlyonedefiniteimmediatefactstuckinhisquiveringgrasp。
Hemustgivethegirleverychance——mustholdhimselfpassivetillshehadtakenthem……
InthecourtEffieranuptohimwithherleapingterrier。
\"Iwascomingouttomeetyou——youandOwen。MissVinerwascoming,too,andthenshecouldn’tbecauseshe’sgotsuchaheadache。I’mafraidIgaveittoherbecauseIdidmydivisionsodisgracefully。It’stoobad,isn’tit?Butwon’tyouwalkbackwithme?Nursewon’tmindtheleastbit;
she’dsomuchrathergointotea。\"
Darrowexcusedhimselflaughingly,onthepleathathehadletterstowrite,whichwasmuchworsethanhavingaheadache,andnotinfrequentlyresultedinone。
\"Oh,thenyoucangoandwritetheminOwen’sstudy。That’swheregentlemenalwayswritetheirletters。\"
SheflewonwithherdogandDarrowpursuedhiswaytothehouse。Effie’ssuggestionstruckhimasuseful。Hehadpicturedhimselfasvaguelydriftingaboutthedrawing—
rooms,andhadperceivedthedifficultyofMissViner’shavingtoseekhimthere;butthestudy,asmallroomontherightofthehall,wasineasysightfromthestaircase,andsosituatedthattherewouldbenothingmarkedinhisbeingfoundthereintalkwithher。
Hewentin,leavingthedooropen,andsatdownatthewriting—table。Theroomwasafriendlyheterogeneousplace,theonerepository,inthewell—orderedandamply—servantedhouse,ofallitsunclassifiedoddsandends:Effie’scroquet—boxandfishingrods,Owen’sgunsandgolf—sticksandracquets,hisstep—mother’sflower—basketsandgardeningimplements,evenMadamedeChantelle’sembroideryframe,andthebacknumbersoftheCatholicWeekly。Theearlytwilighthadbeguntofall,andpresentlyaslantingrayacrossthedeskshowedDarrowthataservantwascomingacrossthehallwithalamp。Hepulledoutasheetofnote—paperandbegantowriteatrandom,whiletheman,entering,putthelampathiselbowandvaguely\"straightened\"theheapofnewspaperstossedonthedivan。ThenhisstepsdiedawayandDarrowsatleaninghisheadonhislockedhands。
Presentlyanotherstepsoundedonthestairs,waveredamomentandthenmovedpastthethresholdofthestudy。
Darrowgotupandwalkedintothehall,whichwasstillunlighted。InthedimnesshesawSophyVinerstandingbythehalldoorinherhatandjacket。Shestoppedatsightofhim,herhandonthedoor—bolt,andtheystoodforasecondwithoutspeaking。
\"HaveyouseenEffie?\"shesuddenlyasked。\"Shewentouttomeetyou。\"
\"SheDIDmeetme,justnow,inthecourt。She’sgoneontojoinherbrother。\"
Darrowspokeasnaturallyashecould,buthisvoicesoundedtohisownearslikeanamateuractor’sina\"light\"part。
MissViner,withoutanswering,drewbackthebolt。Hewatchedherinsilenceasthedoorswungopen;thenhesaid:
\"Shehashernursewithher。Shewon’tbelong。\"
Shestoodirresolute,andheadded:\"Iwaswritinginthere——won’tyoucomeandhavealittletalk?Everyone’sout。\"
Thelastwordsstruckhimasnotwell—chosen,buttherewasnotimetochoose。Shepausedasecondlongerandthencrossedthethresholdofthestudy。Atluncheonshehadsatwithherbacktothewindow,andbeyondnotingthatshehadgrownalittlethinner,andhadlesscolourandvivacity,hehadseennochangeinher;butnow,asthelamplightfellonherface,itswhitenessstartledhim。
\"Poorthing……poorthing……whatinheaven’snamecanshesuppose?\"hewondered。
\"Dositdown——Iwanttotalktoyou,\"hesaidandpushedachairtowardher。
Shedidnotseemtoseeit,or,ifshedid,shedeliberatelychoseanotherseat。Hecamebacktohisownchairandleanedhiselbowsontheblotter。Shefacedhimfromthefarthersideofthetable。
\"Youpromisedtoletmehearfromyounowandthen,\"hebeganawkwardly,andwithasharpsenseofhisawkwardness。
Afaintsmilemadeherfacemoretragic。\"DidI?Therewasnothingtotell。I’vehadnohistory——likethehappycountries……\"
Hewaitedamomentbeforeasking:\"YouAREhappyhere?\"
\"IWAS,\"shesaidwithafaintemphasis。
\"Whydoyousay’was’?You’resurelynotthinkingofgoing?
Therecan’tbekinderpeopleanywhere。\"Darrowhardlyknewwhathewassaying;butheranswercametohimwithdeadlydefiniteness。
\"IsupposeitdependsonyouwhetherIgoorstay。\"
\"Onme?\"HestaredatheracrossOwen’sscatteredpapers。
\"GoodGod!Whatcanyouthinkofme,tosaythat?\"
Themockeryofthequestionflashedbackathimfromherwretchedface。Shestoodup,wanderedaway,andleanedaninstantinthedarkeningwindow—frame。Fromtheresheturnedtoflingbackathim:\"Don’timagineI’mtheleastbitsorryforanything!\"
Hesteadiedhiselbowsonthetableandhidhisfaceinhishands。Itwasharder,oh,damnablyharder,thanhehadexpected!Arguments,expedients,palliations,evasions,allseemedtobeslippingawayfromhim:hewasleftfacetofacewiththemeregracelessfactofhisinferiority。Heliftedhisheadtoaskatrandom:\"You’vebeenhere,then,eversince?\"
\"SinceJune;yes。ItturnedoutthattheFarlowswerehuntingforme——allthewhile——forthis。\"
Shestoodfacinghim,herbacktothewindow,evidentlyimpatienttobegone,yetwithsomethingstilltosay,orthatsheexpectedtohearhimsay。Thesenseofherexpectancybenumbedhim。Whatinheaven’snamecouldhesaytoherthatwasnotanoffenseoramockery?
\"Yourideaofthetheatre——yougavethatupatonce,then?\"
\"Oh,thetheatre!\"Shegavealittlelaugh。\"Icouldn’twaitforthetheatre。Ihadtotakethefirstthingthatoffered;Itookthis。\"
Hepushedonhaltingly:\"I’mglad——extremelyglad——you’rehappyhere……I’dcountedonyourlettingmeknowiftherewasanythingIcoulddo……Thetheatre,now——ifyoustillregretit——ifyou’renotcontentedhere……IknowpeopleinthatlineinLondon——I’mcertainIcanmanageitforyouwhenIgetback————\"
Shemoveduptothetableandleanedoverittoask,inavoicethatwashardlyaboveawhisper:\"ThenyouDOwantmetoleave?Isthatit?\"
Hedroppedhisarmswithagroan。\"Goodheavens!Howcanyouthinksuchthings?Atthetime,youknow,IbeggedyoutoletmedowhatIcould,butyouwouldn’thearofit……andeversinceI’vebeenwantingtobeofuse——todosomething,anything,tohelpyou……\"
Sheheardhimthrough,motionless,withoutaquiveroftheclaspedhandssherestedontheedgeofthetable。
\"Ifyouwanttohelpme,then——youcanhelpmetostayhere,\"shebroughtoutwithlow—tonedintensity。
Throughthestillnessofthepausewhichfollowed,thebrayofamotor—hornsoundedfardownthedrive。Instantlysheturned,withalastwhitelookathim,andfledfromtheroomandupthestairs。Hestoodmotionless,benumbedbytheshockofherlastwords。Shewasafraid,then——afraidofhim——sickwithfearofhim!Thediscoverybeathimdowntoalowerdepth……
Themotor—hornsoundedagain,closeathand,andheturnedandwentuptohisroom。Hisletter—writingwasasufficientpretextfornotimmediatelyjoiningthepartyaboutthetea—table,andhewantedtobealoneandtrytoputalittleorderintohistumultuousthinking。
Upstairs,theroomheldouttheintimatewelcomeofitslampandfire。Everythinginitexhaledthesamesenseofpeaceandstabilitywhich,twoeveningsbefore,hadlulledhimtocomplacentmeditation。Hisarmchairagaininvitedhimfromthehearth,buthewastooagitatedtositstill,andwithsunkheadandhandsclaspedbehindhisbackhebegantowanderupanddowntheroom。
HisfiveminuteswithSophyVinerhadflashedstrangelightsintotheshadowycornersofhisconsciousness。Thegirl’sabsolutecandour,herhardardenthonesty,wasforthemomentthevividestpointinhisthoughts。Hewonderedanew,ashehadwonderedbefore,atthewayinwhichtheharshdisciplineoflifehadstrippedheroffalsesentimentwithoutlayingtheleasttouchonherpride。Whentheyhadparted,fivemonthsbefore,shehadquietlybutdecidedlyrejectedallhisoffersofhelp,eventothesuggestionofhistryingtofurtherhertheatricalaims:shehadmadeitclearthatshewishedtheirbriefalliancetoleavenotraceontheirlivessavethatofitsownsmilingmemory。Butnowthattheywereunexpectedlyconfrontedinasituationwhichseemed,toherterrifiedfancy,toputherathismercy,herfirstimpulsewastodefendherrighttotheplaceshehadwon,andtolearnasquicklyaspossibleifhemeanttodisputeit。Whilehehadpicturedherasshrinkingawayfromhiminatremorofself—effacementshehadwatchedhismovements,madesureofheropportunity,andcomestraightdownto\"haveitout\"withhim。Hewassostruckbythefranknessandenergyoftheproceedingthatforamomenthelostsightoftheviewofhisowncharacterimpliedinit。