第4章

类别:其他 作者:Charles Dickens字数:13986更新时间:19/01/02 16:43:31
\"Thesechildrenwillbethedeathofmeatlast!\"saidMrs。 Tetterby,afterbanishingtheculprit。\"Andthesoonerthebetter,Ithink。\" \"Poorpeople,\"saidMr。Tetterby,\"oughtnottohavechildrenatall。TheygiveUSnopleasure。\" HewasatthatmomenttakingupthecupwhichMrs。Tetterbyhadrudelypushedtowardshim,andMrs。Tetterbywasliftingherowncuptoherlips,whentheybothstopped,asiftheyweretransfixed。 \"Here!Mother!Father!\"criedJohnny,runningintotheroom。 \"Here’sMrs。Williamcomingdownthestreet!\" Andifever,sincetheworldbegan,ayoungboytookababyfromacradlewiththecareofanoldnurse,andhushedandsoothedittenderly,andtotteredawaywithitcheerfully,Johnnywasthatboy,andMolochwasthatbaby,astheywentouttogether! Mr。Tetterbyputdownhiscup;Mrs。Tetterbyputdownhercup。Mr。 Tetterbyrubbedhisforehead;Mrs。Tetterbyrubbedhers。Mr。 Tetterby’sfacebegantosmoothandbrighten;Mrs。Tetterby’sbegantosmoothandbrighten。 \"Why,Lordforgiveme,\"saidMr。Tetterbytohimself,\"whateviltempershaveIbeengivingwayto?Whathasbeenthematterhere!\" \"HowcouldIevertreathimillagain,afterallIsaidandfeltlastnight!\"sobbedMrs。Tetterby,withheraprontohereyes。 \"AmIabrute,\"saidMr。Tetterby,\"oristhereanygoodinmeatall?Sophia!Mylittlewoman!\" \"’Dolphusdear,\"returnedhiswife。 \"I—I’vebeeninastateofmind,\"saidMr。Tetterby,\"thatI can’tabeartothinkof,Sophy。\" \"Oh!It’snothingtowhatI’vebeenin,Dolf,\"criedhiswifeinagreatburstofgrief。 \"MySophia,\"saidMr。Tetterby,\"don’ttakeon。Inevershallforgivemyself。Imusthavenearlybrokeyourheart,Iknow。\" \"No,Dolf,no。Itwasme!Me!\"criedMrs。Tetterby。 \"Mylittlewoman,\"saidherhusband,\"don’t。Youmakemereproachmyselfdreadful,whenyoushowsuchanoblespirit。Sophia,mydear,youdon’tknowwhatIthought。Ishoweditbadenough,nodoubt;butwhatIthought,mylittlewoman!—\" \"Oh,dearDolf,don’t!Don’t!\"criedhiswife。 \"Sophia,\"saidMr。Tetterby,\"Imustrevealit。Icouldn’trestinmyconscienceunlessImentionedit。Mylittlewoman—\" \"Mrs。William’sverynearlyhere!\"screamedJohnnyatthedoor。 \"Mylittlewoman,Iwonderedhow,\"gaspedMr。Tetterby,supportinghimselfbyhischair,\"IwonderedhowIhadeveradmiredyou—I forgotthepreciouschildrenyouhavebroughtaboutme,andthoughtyoudidn’tlookasslimasIcouldwish。I—Inevergavearecollection,\"saidMr。Tetterby,withsevereself—accusation,\"tothecaresyou’vehadasmywife,andalongofmeandmine,whenyoumighthavehadhardlyanywithanotherman,whogotonbetterandwasluckierthanme(anybodymighthavefoundsuchamaneasilyI amsure);andIquarrelledwithyouforhavingagedalittleintheroughyearsyouhavelightenedforme。Canyoubelieveit,mylittlewoman?Ihardlycanmyself。\" Mrs。Tetterby,inawhirlwindoflaughingandcrying,caughthisfacewithinherhands,andhelditthere。 \"Oh,Dolf!\"shecried。\"Iamsohappythatyouthoughtso;Iamsogratefulthatyouthoughtso!ForIthoughtthatyouwerecommon— looking,Dolf;andsoyouare,mydear,andmayyoubethecommonestofallsightsinmyeyes,tillyouclosethemwithyourowngoodhands。Ithoughtthatyouweresmall;andsoyouare,andI’llmakemuchofyoubecauseyouare,andmoreofyoubecauseI lovemyhusband。Ithoughtthatyoubegantostoop;andsoyoudo,andyoushallleanonme,andI’lldoallIcantokeepyouup。I thoughttherewasnoairaboutyou;butthereis,andit’stheairofhome,andthat’sthepurestandthebestthereis,andGodblesshomeoncemore,andallbelongingtoit,Dolf!\" \"Hurrah!Here’sMrs。William!\"criedJohnny。 Soshewas,andallthechildrenwithher;andsoshecamein,theykissedher,andkissedoneanother,andkissedthebaby,andkissedtheirfatherandmother,andthenranbackandflockedanddancedabouther,troopingonwithherintriumph。 Mr。andMrs。Tetterbywerenotabitbehind—handinthewarmthoftheirreception。Theywereasmuchattractedtoherasthechildrenwere;theyrantowardsher,kissedherhands,pressedroundher,couldnotreceiveherardentlyorenthusiasticallyenough。Shecameamongthemlikethespiritofallgoodness,affection,gentleconsideration,love,anddomesticity。 \"What!areYOUallsogladtoseeme,too,thisbrightChristmasmorning?\"saidMilly,clappingherhandsinapleasantwonder。\"Ohdear,howdelightfulthisis!\" Moreshoutingfromthechildren,morekissing,moretroopingroundher,morehappiness,morelove,morejoy,morehonour,onallsides,thanshecouldbear。 \"Ohdear!\"saidMilly,\"whatdelicioustearsyoumakemeshed。HowcanIeverhavedeservedthis!WhathaveIdonetobesoloved?\" \"Whocanhelpit!\"criedMr。Tetterby。 \"Whocanhelpit!\"criedMrs。Tetterby。 \"Whocanhelpit!\"echoedthechildren,inajoyfulchorus。Andtheydancedandtroopedaboutheragain,andclungtoher,andlaidtheirrosyfacesagainstherdress,andkissedandfondledit,andcouldnotfondleit,orher,enough。 \"Ineverwassomoved,\"saidMilly,dryinghereyes,\"asIhavebeenthismorning。Imusttellyou,assoonasIcanspeak。—Mr。 Redlawcametomeatsunrise,andwithatendernessinhismanner,moreasifIhadbeenhisdarlingdaughterthanmyself,imploredmetogowithhimtowhereWilliam’sbrotherGeorgeislyingill。Wewenttogether,andallthewayalonghewassokind,andsosubdued,andseemedtoputsuchtrustandhopeinme,thatIcouldnothelptryingwithpleasure。Whenwegottothehouse,wemetawomanatthedoor(somebodyhadbruisedandhurther,Iamafraid),whocaughtmebythehand,andblessedmeasIpassed。\" \"Shewasright!\"saidMr。Tetterby。Mrs。Tetterbysaidshewasright。Allthechildrencriedoutthatshewasright。 \"Ah,butthere’smorethanthat,\"saidMilly。\"Whenwegotupstairs,intotheroom,thesickmanwhohadlainforhoursinastatefromwhichnoeffortcouldrousehim,roseupinhisbed,and,burstingintotears,stretchedouthisarmstome,andsaidthathehadledamis—spentlife,butthathewastrulyrepentantnow,inhissorrowforthepast,whichwasallasplaintohimasagreatprospect,fromwhichadenseblackcloudhadclearedaway,andthatheentreatedmetoaskhispooroldfatherforhispardonandhisblessing,andtosayaprayerbesidehisbed。AndwhenI didso,Mr。Redlawjoinedinitsofervently,andthensothankedandthankedme,andthankedHeaven,thatmyheartquiteoverflowed,andIcouldhavedonenothingbutsobandcry,ifthesickmanhadnotbeggedmetositdownbyhim,—whichmademequietofcourse。 AsIsatthere,heheldmyhandinhisuntilhesankinadoze;andeventhen,whenIwithdrewmyhandtoleavehimtocomehere(whichMr。Redlawwasveryearnestindeedinwishingmetodo),hishandfeltformine,sothatsomeoneelsewasobligedtotakemyplaceandmakebelievetogivehimmyhandback。Ohdear,ohdear,\"saidMilly,sobbing。\"HowthankfulandhowhappyIshouldfeel,anddofeel,forallthis!\" Whileshewasspeaking,Redlawhadcomein,and,afterpausingforamomenttoobservethegroupofwhichshewasthecentre,hadsilentlyascendedthestairs。Uponthosestairshenowappearedagain;remainingthere,whiletheyoungstudentpassedhim,andcamerunningdown。 \"Kindnurse,gentlest,bestofcreatures,\"hesaid,fallingonhiskneetoher,andcatchingatherhand,\"forgivemycruelingratitude!\" \"Ohdear,ohdear!\"criedMillyinnocently,\"here’sanotherofthem!Ohdear,here’ssomebodyelsewholikesme。WhatshallI everdo!\" Theguileless,simplewayinwhichshesaidit,andinwhichsheputherhandsbeforehereyesandweptforveryhappiness,wasastouchingasitwasdelightful。 \"Iwasnotmyself,\"hesaid。\"Idon’tknowwhatitwas—itwassomeconsequenceofmydisorderperhaps—Iwasmad。ButIamsonolonger。AlmostasIspeak,Iamrestored。Iheardthechildrencryingoutyourname,andtheshadepassedfrommeattheverysoundofit。Oh,don’tweep!DearMilly,ifyoucouldreadmyheart,andonlyknewwithwhataffectionandwhatgratefulhomageitisglowing,youwouldnotletmeseeyouweep。Itissuchdeepreproach。\" \"No,no,\"saidMilly,\"it’snotthat。It’snotindeed。It’sjoy。 It’swonderthatyoushouldthinkitnecessarytoaskmetoforgivesolittle,andyetit’spleasurethatyoudo。\" \"Andwillyoucomeagain?andwillyoufinishthelittlecurtain?\" \"No,\"saidMilly,dryinghereyes,andshakingherhead。\"Youwon’tcareformyneedleworknow。\" \"Isitforgivingme,tosaythat?\" Shebeckonedhimaside,andwhisperedinhisear。 \"Thereisnewsfromyourhome,Mr。Edmund。\" \"News?How?\" \"Eitheryournotwritingwhenyouwereveryill,orthechangeinyourhandwritingwhenyoubegantobebetter,createdsomesuspicionofthetruth;howeverthatis—butyou’resureyou’llnotbetheworseforanynews,ifit’snotbadnews?\" \"Sure。\" \"Thenthere’ssomeonecome!\"saidMilly。 \"Mymother?\"askedthestudent,glancingroundinvoluntarilytowardsRedlaw,whohadcomedownfromthestairs。 \"Hush!No,\"saidMilly。 \"Itcanbenooneelse。\" \"Indeed?\"saidMilly,\"areyousure?\" \"Itisnot—\"Beforehecouldsaymore,sheputherhanduponhismouth。 \"Yesitis!\"saidMilly。\"Theyounglady(sheisveryliketheminiature,Mr。Edmund,butsheisprettier)wastoounhappytorestwithoutsatisfyingherdoubts,andcameup,lastnight,withalittleservant—maid。Asyoualwaysdatedyourlettersfromthecollege,shecamethere;andbeforeIsawMr。Redlawthismorning,Isawher。SHElikesmetoo!\"saidMilly。\"Ohdear,that’sanother!\" \"Thismorning!Whereisshenow?\" \"Why,sheisnow,\"saidMilly,advancingherlipstohisear,\"inmylittleparlourintheLodge,andwaitingtoseeyou。\" Hepressedherhand,andwasdartingoff,butshedetainedhim。 \"Mr。Redlawismuchaltered,andhastoldmethismorningthathismemoryisimpaired。Beveryconsideratetohim,Mr。Edmund;heneedsthatfromusall。\" Theyoungmanassuredher,byalook,thathercautionwasnotill— bestowed;andashepassedtheChemistonhiswayout,bentrespectfullyandwithanobviousinterestbeforehim。 Redlawreturnedthesalutationcourteouslyandevenhumbly,andlookedafterhimashepassedon。Hedroppedhisheaduponhishandtoo,astryingtoreawakensomethinghehadlost。Butitwasgone。 Theabidingchangethathadcomeuponhimsincetheinfluenceofthemusic,andthePhantom’sreappearance,was,thatnowhetrulyfelthowmuchhehadlost,andcouldcompassionatehisowncondition,andcontrastit,clearly,withthenaturalstateofthosewhowerearoundhim。Inthis,aninterestinthosewhowerearoundhimwasrevived,andameek,submissivesenseofhiscalamitywasbred,resemblingthatwhichsometimesobtainsinage,whenitsmentalpowersareweakened,withoutinsensibilityorsullennessbeingaddedtothelistofitsinfirmities。 Hewasconsciousthat,asheredeemed,throughMilly,moreandmoreoftheevilhehaddone,andashewasmoreandmorewithher,thischangeripeneditselfwithinhim。Therefore,andbecauseoftheattachmentsheinspiredhimwith(butwithoutotherhope),hefeltthathewasquitedependentonher,andthatshewashisstaffinhisaffliction。 So,whensheaskedhimwhethertheyshouldgohomenow,towheretheoldmanandherhusbandwere,andhereadilyreplied\"yes\"— beinganxiousinthatregard—heputhisarmthroughhers,andwalkedbesideher;notasifhewerethewiseandlearnedmantowhomthewondersofNaturewereanopenbook,andhersweretheuninstructedmind,butasiftheirtwopositionswerereversed,andheknewnothing,andsheall。 Hesawthechildrenthrongabouther,andcaressher,asheandshewentawaytogetherthus,outofthehouse;heheardtheringingoftheirlaughter,andtheirmerryvoices;hesawtheirbrightfaces,clusteringaroundhimlikeflowers;hewitnessedtherenewedcontentmentandaffectionoftheirparents;hebreathedthesimpleairoftheirpoorhome,restoredtoitstranquillity;hethoughtoftheunwholesomeblighthehadsheduponit,andmight,butforher,havebeendiffusingthen;andperhapsitisnowonderthathewalkedsubmissivelybesideher,anddrewhergentlebosomnearertohisown。 WhentheyarrivedattheLodge,theoldmanwassittinginhischairinthechimney—corner,withhiseyesfixedontheground,andhissonwasleaningagainsttheoppositesideofthefire—place,lookingathim。Asshecameinatthedoor,bothstarted,andturnedroundtowardsher,andaradiantchangecameupontheirfaces。 \"Ohdear,dear,dear,theyareallpleasedtoseemeliketherest!\"criedMilly,clappingherhandsinanecstasy,andstoppingshort。\"Herearetwomore!\" Pleasedtoseeher!Pleasurewasnowordforit。Sheranintoherhusband’sarms,thrownwideopentoreceiveher,andhewouldhavebeengladtohaveherthere,withherheadlyingonhisshoulder,throughtheshortwinter’sday。Buttheoldmancouldn’tspareher。Hehadarmsforhertoo,andhelockedherinthem。 \"Why,wherehasmyquietMousebeenallthistime?\"saidtheoldman。\"Shehasbeenalongwhileaway。Ifindthatit’simpossibleformetogetonwithoutMouse。I—where’smysonWilliam?—I fancyIhavebeendreaming,William。\" \"That’swhatIsaymyself,father,\"returnedhisson。\"Ihavebeeninanuglysortofdream,Ithink。—Howareyou,father?Areyouprettywell?\" \"Strongandbrave,myboy,\"returnedtheoldman。 ItwasquiteasighttoseeMr。Williamshakinghandswithhisfather,andpattinghimontheback,andrubbinghimgentlydownwithhishand,asifhecouldnotpossiblydoenoughtoshowaninterestinhim。 \"Whatawonderfulmanyouare,father!—Howareyou,father?Areyoureallyprettyhearty,though?\"saidWilliam,shakinghandswithhimagain,andpattinghimagain,andrubbinghimgentlydownagain。 \"Ineverwasfresherorstouterinmylife,myboy。\" \"Whatawonderfulmanyouare,father!Butthat’sexactlywhereitis,\"saidMr。William,withenthusiasm。\"WhenIthinkofallthatmyfather’sgonethrough,andallthechancesandchanges,andsorrowsandtroubles,thathavehappenedtohiminthecourseofhislonglife,andunderwhichhisheadhasgrowngrey,andyearsuponyearshavegatheredonit,Ifeelasifwecouldn’tdoenoughtohonourtheoldgentleman,andmakehisoldageeasy。—Howareyou,father?Areyoureallyprettywell,though?\" Mr。Williammightneverhaveleftoffrepeatingthisinquiry,andshakinghandswithhimagain,andpattinghimagain,andrubbinghimdownagain,iftheoldmanhadnotespiedtheChemist,whomuntilnowhehadnotseen。 \"Iaskyourpardon,Mr。Redlaw,\"saidPhilip,\"butdidn’tknowyouwerehere,sir,orshouldhavemadelessfree。Itremindsme,Mr。 Redlaw,seeingyouhereonaChristmasmorning,ofthetimewhenyouwasastudentyourself,andworkedsohardthatyouwerebackwardsandforwardsinourLibraryevenatChristmastime。Ha! ha!I’moldenoughtorememberthat;andIrememberitrightwell,Ido,thoughIameight—seven。Itwasafteryouleftherethatmypoorwifedied。Youremembermypoorwife,Mr。Redlaw?\" TheChemistansweredyes。 \"Yes,\"saidtheoldman。\"Shewasadearcreetur。—IrecollectyoucomehereoneChristmasmorningwithayounglady—Iaskyourpardon,Mr。Redlaw,butIthinkitwasasisteryouwasverymuchattachedto?\" TheChemistlookedathim,andshookhishead。\"Ihadasister,\" hesaidvacantly。Heknewnomore。 \"OneChristmasmorning,\"pursuedtheoldman,\"thatyoucomeherewithher—anditbegantosnow,andmywifeinvitedtheladytowalkin,andsitbythefirethatisalwaysaburningonChristmasDayinwhatusedtobe,beforeourtenpoorgentlemencommuted,ourgreatDinnerHall。Iwasthere;andIrecollect,asIwasstirringuptheblazefortheyoungladytowarmherprettyfeetby,shereadthescrolloutloud,thatisunderneaththatpictur,’Lord,keepmymemorygreen!’Sheandmypoorwifefellatalkingaboutit;andit’sastrangethingtothinkof,now,thattheybothsaid(bothbeingsounliketodie)thatitwasagoodprayer,andthatitwasonetheywouldputupveryearnestly,iftheywerecalledawayyoung,withreferencetothosewhoweredearesttothem。’Mybrother,’saystheyounglady—’Myhusband,’saysmypoorwife。— ’Lord,keephismemoryofme,green,anddonotletmebeforgotten!’\" Tearsmorepainful,andmorebitterthanhehadevershedinallhislife,courseddownRedlaw’sface。Philip,fullyoccupiedinrecallinghisstory,hadnotobservedhimuntilnow,norMilly’sanxietythatheshouldnotproceed。 \"Philip!\"saidRedlaw,layinghishanduponhisarm,\"Iamastrickenman,onwhomthehandofProvidencehasfallenheavily,althoughdeservedly。Youspeaktome,myfriend,ofwhatIcannotfollow;mymemoryisgone。\" \"Mercifulpower!\"criedtheoldman。 \"Ihavelostmymemoryofsorrow,wrong,andtrouble,\"saidtheChemist,\"andwiththatIhavelostallmanwouldremember!\" ToseeoldPhilip’spityforhim,toseehimwheelhisowngreatchairforhimtorestin,andlookdownuponhimwithasolemnsenseofhisbereavement,wastoknow,insomedegree,howprecioustooldagesuchrecollectionsare。 Theboycamerunningin,andrantoMilly。 \"Here’stheman,\"hesaid,\"intheotherroom。Idon’twantHIM。\" \"Whatmandoeshemean?\"askedMr。William。 \"Hush!\"saidMilly。 Obedienttoasignfromher,heandhisoldfathersoftlywithdrew。 Astheywentout,unnoticed,Redlawbeckonedtotheboytocometohim。 \"Ilikethewomanbest,\"heanswered,holdingtoherskirts。 \"Youareright,\"saidRedlaw,withafaintsmile。\"Butyouneedn’tfeartocometome。IamgentlerthanIwas。Ofalltheworld,toyou,poorchild!\" Theboystillheldbackatfirst,butyieldinglittlebylittletoherurging,heconsentedtoapproach,andeventositdownathisfeet。AsRedlawlaidhishandupontheshoulderofthechild,lookingonhimwithcompassionandafellow—feeling,heputouthisotherhandtoMilly。Shestoopeddownonthatsideofhim,sothatshecouldlookintohisface,andaftersilence,said: \"Mr。Redlaw,mayIspeaktoyou?\" \"Yes,\"heanswered,fixinghiseyesuponher。\"Yourvoiceandmusicarethesametome。\" \"MayIaskyousomething?\" \"Whatyouwill。\" \"DoyourememberwhatIsaid,whenIknockedatyourdoorlastnight?Aboutonewhowasyourfriendonce,andwhostoodonthevergeofdestruction?\" \"Yes。Iremember,\"hesaid,withsomehesitation。 \"Doyouunderstandit?\" Hesmoothedtheboy’shair—lookingatherfixedlythewhile,andshookhishead。 \"Thisperson,\"saidMilly,inherclear,softvoice,whichhermildeyes,lookingathim,madeclearerandsofter,\"Ifoundsoonafterwards。Iwentbacktothehouse,and,withHeaven’shelp,tracedhim。Iwasnottoosoon。AverylittleandIshouldhavebeentoolate。\" Hetookhishandfromtheboy,andlayingitonthebackofthathandofhers,whosetimidandyetearnesttouchaddressedhimnolessappealinglythanhervoiceandeyes,lookedmoreintentlyonher。 \"HeISthefatherofMr。Edmund,theyounggentlemanwesawjustnow。HisrealnameisLongford。—Yourecollectthename?\" \"Irecollectthename。\" \"Andtheman?\" \"No,nottheman。Didheeverwrongme?\" \"Yes!\" \"Ah!Thenit’shopeless—hopeless。\" Heshookhishead,andsoftlybeatuponthehandheheld,asthoughmutelyaskinghercommiseration。 \"IdidnotgotoMr。Edmundlastnight,\"saidMilly,—\"Youwilllistentomejustthesameasifyoudidrememberall?\" \"Toeverysyllableyousay。\" \"Both,becauseIdidnotknow,then,thatthisreallywashisfather,andbecauseIwasfearfuloftheeffectofsuchintelligenceuponhim,afterhisillness,ifitshouldbe。SinceI haveknownwhothispersonis,Ihavenotgoneeither;butthatisforanotherreason。Hehaslongbeenseparatedfromhiswifeandson—hasbeenastrangertohishomealmostfromthisson’sinfancy,Ilearnfromhim—andhasabandonedanddesertedwhatheshouldhaveheldmostdear。Inallthattimehehasbeenfallingfromthestateofagentleman,moreandmore,until—\"sheroseup,hastily,andgoingoutforamoment,returned,accompaniedbythewreckthatRedlawhadbeheldlastnight。 \"Doyouknowme?\"askedtheChemist。 \"Ishouldbeglad,\"returnedtheother,\"andthatisanunwontedwordformetouse,ifIcouldanswerno。\" TheChemistlookedattheman,standinginself—abasementanddegradationbeforehim,andwouldhavelookedlonger,inanineffectualstruggleforenlightenment,butthatMillyresumedherlatepositionbyhisside,andattractedhisattentivegazetoherownface。 \"Seehowlowheissunk,howlostheis!\"shewhispered,stretchingoutherarmtowardshim,withoutlookingfromtheChemist’sface。 \"Ifyoucouldrememberallthatisconnectedwithhim,doyounotthinkitwouldmoveyourpitytoreflectthatoneyoueverloved(donotletusmindhowlongago,orinwhatbeliefthathehasforfeited),shouldcometothis?\" \"Ihopeitwould,\"heanswered。\"Ibelieveitwould。\" Hiseyeswanderedtothefigurestandingnearthedoor,butcamebackspeedilytoher,onwhomhegazedintently,asifhestrovetolearnsomelessonfromeverytoneofhervoice,andeverybeamofhereyes。 \"Ihavenolearning,andyouhavemuch,\"saidMilly;\"Iamnotusedtothink,andyouarealwaysthinking。MayItellyouwhyitseemstomeagoodthingforus,torememberwrongthathasbeendoneus?\" \"Yes。\" \"Thatwemayforgiveit。\" \"Pardonme,greatHeaven!\"saidRedlaw,liftinguphiseyes,\"forhavingthrownawaythineownhighattribute!\" \"Andif,\"saidMilly,\"ifyourmemoryshouldonedayberestored,aswewillhopeandprayitmaybe,woulditnotbeablessingtoyoutorecallatonceawronganditsforgiveness?\" Helookedatthefigurebythedoor,andfastenedhisattentiveeyesonheragain;arayofclearerlightappearedtohimtoshineintohismind,fromherbrightface。 \"Hecannotgotohisabandonedhome。Hedoesnotseektogothere。 Heknowsthathecouldonlycarryshameandtroubletothosehehassocruellyneglected;andthatthebestreparationhecanmakethemnow,istoavoidthem。Averylittlemoneycarefullybestowed,wouldremovehimtosomedistantplace,wherehemightliveanddonowrong,andmakesuchatonementasisleftwithinhispowerforthewronghehasdone。Totheunfortunateladywhoishiswife,andtohisson,thiswouldbethebestandkindestboonthattheirbestfriendcouldgivethem—onetoothattheyneedneverknowof; andtohim,shatteredinreputation,mind,andbody,itmightbesalvation。\" Hetookherheadbetweenherhands,andkissedit,andsaid:\"Itshallbedone。Itrusttoyoutodoitforme,nowandsecretly; andtotellhimthatIwouldforgivehim,ifIweresohappyastoknowforwhat。\" Assherose,andturnedherbeamingfacetowardsthefallenman,implyingthathermediationhadbeensuccessful,headvancedastep,andwithoutraisinghiseyes,addressedhimselftoRedlaw。 \"Youaresogenerous,\"hesaid,\"—youeverwere—thatyouwilltrytobanishyourrisingsenseofretributioninthespectaclethatisbeforeyou。Idonottrytobanishitfrommyself,Redlaw。 Ifyoucan,believeme。\" TheChemistentreatedMilly,byagesture,tocomenearertohim; and,ashelistenedlookedinherface,asiftofindinitthecluetowhatheheard。 \"Iamtoodecayedawretchtomakeprofessions;Irecollectmyowncareertoowell,toarrayanysuchbeforeyou。ButfromthedayonwhichImademyfirststepdownward,indealingfalselybyyou,I havegonedownwithacertain,steady,doomedprogression。That,I say。\" Redlaw,keepinghercloseathisside,turnedhisfacetowardsthespeaker,andtherewassorrowinit。Somethinglikemournfulrecognitiontoo。 \"Imighthavebeenanotherman,mylifemighthavebeenanotherlife,ifIhadavoidedthatfirstfatalstep。Idon’tknowthatitwouldhavebeen。Iclaimnothingforthepossibility。Yoursisterisatrest,andbetterthanshecouldhavebeenwithme,ifIhadcontinuedevenwhatyouthoughtme:evenwhatIoncesupposedmyselftobe。\" Redlawmadeahastymotionwithhishand,asifhewouldhaveputthatsubjectononeside。 \"Ispeak,\"theotherwenton,\"likeamantakenfromthegrave。I shouldhavemademyowngrave,lastnight,haditnotbeenforthisblessedhand。\" \"Ohdear,helikesmetoo!\"sobbedMilly,underherbreath。 \"That’sanother!\" \"Icouldnothaveputmyselfinyourway,lastnight,evenforbread。But,to—day,myrecollectionofwhathasbeenissostronglystirred,andispresentedtome,Idon’tknowhow,sovividly,thatIhavedaredtocomeathersuggestion,andtotakeyourbounty,andtothankyouforit,andtobegyou,Redlaw,inyourdyinghour,tobeasmercifultomeinyourthoughts,asyouareinyourdeeds。\" Heturnedtowardsthedoor,andstoppedamomentonhiswayforth。 \"Ihopemysonmayinterestyou,forhismother’ssake。Ihopehemaydeservetodoso。Unlessmylifeshouldbepreservedalongtime,andIshouldknowthatIhavenotmisusedyouraid,Ishallneverlookuponhimmore。\" Goingout,heraisedhiseyestoRedlawforthefirsttime。 Redlaw,whosesteadfastgazewasfixeduponhim,dreamilyheldouthishand。Hereturnedandtouchedit—littlemore—withbothhisown;andbendingdownhishead,wentslowlyout。 Inthefewmomentsthatelapsed,whileMillysilentlytookhimtothegate,theChemistdroppedintohischair,andcoveredhisfacewithhishands。Seeinghimthus,whenshecameback,accompaniedbyherhusbandandhisfather(whowerebothgreatlyconcernedforhim),sheavoideddisturbinghim,orpermittinghimtobedisturbed;andkneeleddownnearthechairtoputsomewarmclothingontheboy。 \"That’sexactlywhereitis。That’swhatIalwayssay,father!\" exclaimedheradmiringhusband。\"There’samotherlyfeelinginMrs。William’sbreastthatmustandwillhavewent!\" \"Ay,ay,\"saidtheoldman;\"you’reright。MysonWilliam’sright!\" \"Ithappensallforthebest,Millydear,nodoubt,\"saidMr。 William,tenderly,\"thatwehavenochildrenofourown;andyetI sometimeswishyouhadonetoloveandcherish。Ourlittledeadchildthatyoubuiltsuchhopesupon,andthatneverbreathedthebreathoflife—ithasmadeyouquiet—like,Milly。\" \"Iamveryhappyintherecollectionofit,Williamdear,\"sheanswered。\"Ithinkofiteveryday。\" \"Iwasafraidyouthoughtofitagooddeal。\" \"Don’tsay,afraid;itisacomforttome;itspeakstomeinsomanyways。Theinnocentthingthatneverlivedonearth,islikeanangeltome,William。\" \"Youarelikeanangeltofatherandme,\"saidMr。William,softly。 \"Iknowthat。\" \"WhenIthinkofallthosehopesIbuiltuponit,andthemanytimesIsatandpicturedtomyselfthelittlesmilingfaceuponmybosomthatneverlaythere,andthesweeteyesturneduptominethatneveropenedtothelight,\"saidMilly,\"Icanfeelagreatertenderness,Ithink,forallthedisappointedhopesinwhichthereisnoharm。WhenIseeabeautifulchildinitsfondmother’sarms,Iloveitallthebetter,thinkingthatmychildmighthavebeenlikethat,andmighthavemademyheartasproudandhappy。\" Redlawraisedhishead,andlookedtowardsher。 \"Allthroughlife,itseemsbyme,\"shecontinued,\"totellmesomething。Forpoorneglectedchildren,mylittlechildpleadsasifitwerealive,andhadavoiceIknew,withwhichtospeaktome。WhenIhearofyouthinsufferingorshame,Ithinkthatmychildmighthavecometothat,perhaps,andthatGodtookitfrommeinHismercy。Eveninageandgreyhair,suchasfather’s,itispresent:sayingthatittoomighthavelivedtobeold,longandlongafteryouandIweregone,andtohaveneededtherespectandloveofyoungerpeople。\" Herquietvoicewasquieterthanever,asshetookherhusband’sarm,andlaidherheadagainstit。 \"Childrenlovemeso,thatsometimesIhalffancy—it’sasillyfancy,William—theyhavesomewayIdon’tknowof,offeelingformylittlechild,andme,andunderstandingwhytheirloveisprecioustome。IfIhavebeenquietsince,Ihavebeenmorehappy,William,inahundredways。Notleasthappy,dear,inthis—thatevenwhenmylittlechildwasbornanddeadbutafewdays,andIwasweakandsorrowful,andcouldnothelpgrievingalittle,thethoughtarose,thatifItriedtoleadagoodlife,IshouldmeetinHeavenabrightcreature,whowouldcallme,Mother!\" Redlawfelluponhisknees,withaloudcry。 \"OThou,hesaid,\"whothroughtheteachingofpurelove,hastgraciouslyrestoredmetothememorywhichwasthememoryofChristupontheCross,andofallthegoodwhoperishedinHiscause,receivemythanks,andblessher!\" Then,hefoldedhertohisheart;andMilly,sobbingmorethanever,cried,asshelaughed,\"Heiscomebacktohimself!Helikesmeverymuchindeed,too!Oh,dear,dear,dearme,here’sanother!\" Then,thestudententered,leadingbythehandalovelygirl,whowasafraidtocome。AndRedlawsochangedtowardshim,seeinginhimandhisyouthfulchoice,thesoftenedshadowofthatchasteningpassageinhisownlife,towhich,astoashadytree,thedovesolongimprisonedinhissolitaryarkmightflyforrestandcompany,felluponhisneck,entreatingthemtobehischildren。 Then,asChristmasisatimeinwhich,ofalltimesintheyear,thememoryofeveryremediablesorrow,wrong,andtroubleintheworldaroundus,shouldbeactivewithus,notlessthanourownexperiences,forallgood,helaidhishandupontheboy,and,silentlycallingHimtowitnesswholaidHishandonchildreninoldtime,rebuking,inthemajestyofHispropheticknowledge,thosewhokeptthemfromHim,vowedtoprotecthim,teachhim,andreclaimhim。 Then,hegavehisrighthandcheerilytoPhilip,andsaidthattheywouldthatdayholdaChristmasdinnerinwhatusedtobe,beforethetenpoorgentlemencommuted,theirgreatDinnerHall;andthattheywouldbidtoitasmanyofthatSwidgerfamily,who,hissonhadtoldhim,weresonumerousthattheymightjoinhandsandmakearingroundEngland,ascouldbebroughttogetheronsoshortanotice。 Anditwasthatdaydone。ThereweresomanySwidgersthere,grownupandchildren,thatanattempttostatetheminroundnumbersmightengenderdoubts,inthedistrustful,oftheveracityofthishistory。Thereforetheattemptshallnotbemade。Buttheretheywere,bydozensandscores—andtherewasgoodnewsandgoodhopethere,readyforthem,ofGeorge,whohadbeenvisitedagainbyhisfatherandbrother,andbyMilly,andagainleftinaquietsleep。 There,presentatthedinner,too,weretheTetterbys,includingyoungAdolphus,whoarrivedinhisprismaticcomforter,ingoodtimeforthebeef。Johnnyandthebabyweretoolate,ofcourse,andcameinallononeside,theoneexhausted,theotherinasupposedstateofdouble—tooth;butthatwascustomary,andnotalarming。 Itwassadtoseethechildwhohadnonameorlineage,watchingtheotherchildrenastheyplayed,notknowinghowtotalkwiththem,orsportwiththem,andmorestrangetothewaysofchildhoodthanaroughdog。Itwassad,thoughinadifferentway,toseewhataninstinctiveknowledgetheyoungestchildrentherehadofhisbeingdifferentfromalltherest,andhowtheymadetimidapproachestohimwithsoftwordsandtouches,andwithlittlepresents,thathemightnotbeunhappy。ButhekeptbyMilly,andbegantoloveher—thatwasanother,asshesaid!—and,astheyalllikedherdearly,theyweregladofthat,andwhentheysawhimpeepingatthemfrombehindherchair,theywerepleasedthathewassoclosetoit。 Allthis,theChemist,sittingwiththestudentandhisbridethatwastobe,Philip,andtherest,saw。 Somepeoplehavesaidsince,thatheonlythoughtwhathasbeenhereinsetdown;others,thathereaditinthefire,onewinternightaboutthetwilighttime;others,thattheGhostwasbuttherepresentationofhisgloomythoughts,andMillytheembodimentofhisbetterwisdom。Isaynothing。 —Exceptthis。ThatastheywereassembledintheoldHall,bynootherlightthanthatofagreatfire(havingdinedearly),theshadowsoncemorestoleoutoftheirhiding—places,anddancedabouttheroom,showingthechildrenmarvellousshapesandfacesonthewalls,andgraduallychangingwhatwasrealandfamiliarthere,towhatwaswildandmagical。ButthattherewasonethingintheHall,towhichtheeyesofRedlaw,andofMillyandherhusband,andoftheoldman,andofthestudent,andhisbridethatwastobe,wereoftenturned,whichtheshadowsdidnotobscureorchange。 Deepenedinitsgravitybythefire—light,andgazingfromthedarknessofthepanelledwalllikelife,thesedatefaceintheportrait,withthebeardandruff,lookeddownatthemfromunderitsverdantwreathofholly,astheylookedupatit;and,clearandplainbelow,asifavoicehadutteredthem,werethewords。 LordkeepmyMemorygreen。