第56章

类别:其他 作者:Linda Lael Miller字数:4136更新时间:18/12/26 17:01:03
shallprayforyou。“ Theeyesofthemother,openedbysofirmahand,tookinwithoneretrospectiveglancethewholecourseofherlife。Illuminedbythisflashoflight,shesawherinvoluntarywrong-doingandburstintotears。Theoldpriestwassodeeplymovedattherepentanceofabeingwhohadsinnedsolelythroughignorance,thathelefttheroomhastilylestsheshouldseehispity。 Josephreturnedtohismother’sroomabouttwohoursafterherconfessorhadlefther。Hehadbeentoafriendtoborrowthenecessarymoneytopayhismostpressingdebts,andhecameinontiptoe,thinkingthathismotherwasasleep。Hesatdowninanarmchairwithoutherseeinghim;buthesprangupwithacoldchillrunningthroughhimasheheardhersay,inavoicebrokenwithsobs,—— “Willheforgiveme?“ “Whatisit,mother?“heexclaimed,shockedatthestrickenfaceofthepoorwoman,andthinkingthewordsmustmeanthedeliriumthatprecedesdeath。 “Ah,Joseph!canyoupardonme,mychild?“shecried。 “Forwhat?“hesaid。 “Ihaveneverlovedyouasyoudeservedtobeloved。“ “Oh,whatanaccusation!“hecried。“Notlovedme?Forsevenyearshavewenotlivedalonetogether?Allthesesevenyearshaveyounottakencareofmeanddoneeverythingforme?DoInotseeyoueveryday,——hearyourvoice?Areyounotthegentleandindulgentcompanionofmymiserablelife?Youdon’tunderstandpainting?——Ah!butthat’sagiftnotalwaysgiven。IwassayingtoGrassouonlyyesterday:’WhatcomfortsmeinthemidstofmytrialsisthatIhavesuchagoodmother。Sheisallthatanartist’swifeshouldbe;sheseestoeverything;shetakescareofmymaterialwantswithoutevertroublingorworryingme。’“ “No,Joseph,no;youhavelovedme,butIhavenotreturnedyouloveforlove。Ah!wouldthatIcouldlivealittlelonger——Givemeyourhand。“ Agathetookherson’shand,kissedit,helditonherheart,andlookedinhisfacealongtime,——lettinghimseetheazureofhereyesresplendentwithatendernessshehadhithertobestowedonPhilippeonly。Thepainter,wellfittedtojudgeofexpression,wassostruckbythechange,andsawsoplainlyhowtheheartofhismotherhadopenedtohim,thathetookherinhisarms,andheldherforsomemomentstohisheart,cryingoutlikeonebesidehimself,——“Mymother! oh,mymother!“ “Ah!IfeelthatIamforgiven!“shesaid。“Godwillconfirmthechild’spardonofitsmother。“ “Youmustbecalm:don’ttormentyourself;hearme。Ifeelmyselflovedenoughinthisonemomentforallthepast,“hesaid,ashelaidherbackuponthepillows。 Duringthetwoweeks’strugglebetweenlifeanddeath,thereglowedsuchloveineverylookandgestureandimpulseofthesoulofthepiouscreature,thateacheffusionofherfeelingsseemedliketheexpressionofalifetime。Themotherthoughtonlyofherson;sheherselfcountedfornothing;sustainedbylove,shewasunawareofhersufferings。D’Arthez,MichelChrestien,FulgenceRidal,PierreGrassou,andBianchonoftenkeptJosephcompany,andsheheardthemtalkingartinalowvoiceinacornerofherroom。 “Oh,howIwishIknewwhatcoloris!“sheexclaimedoneeveningassheheardthemdiscussingoneofJoseph’spictures。 Joseph,onhisside,wassublimelydevotedtohismother。Heneverleftherchamber;answeredtendernessbytenderness,cherishingheruponhisheart。Thespectaclewasneverafterwardsforgottenbyhisfriends;andtheythemselves,abandofbrothersintalentandnobilityofnature,weretoJosephandhismotherallthattheyshouldhavebeen,——friendswhoprayed,andtrulywept;notsayingprayersandsheddingtears,butonewiththeirfriendinthoughtandaction。 Joseph,inspiredasmuchbyfeelingasbygenius,divinedintheoccasionalexpressionofhismother’sfaceadesirethatwasdeephiddeninherheart,andhesaidonedaytod’Arthez,—— “ShehaslovedthatbrigandPhilippetoowellnottowanttoseehimbeforeshedies。“ JosephbeggedBixiou,whofrequentedtheBohemianregionswherePhilippewasstilloccasionallytobefound,topersuadethatshamelesssontoplay,ifonlyoutofpity,alittlecomedyoftendernesswhichmightwrapthemother’sheartinawinding-sheetofillusivehappiness。Bixiou,inhiscapacityasanobservingandmisanthropicalscoffer,desirednothingbetterthantoundertakesuchamission。WhenhehadmadeknownMadameBridau’sconditiontotheComtedeBrambourg,whoreceivedhiminabedroomhungwithyellowdamask,thecolonellaughed。 “Whatthedevildoyouwantmetodothere?“hecried。“Theonlyservicethepoorwomancanrendermeistodieassoonasshecan;shewouldberatherasorryfigureatmymarriagewithMademoiselledeSoulanges。Thelessmyfamilyisseen,thebettermyposition。YoucaneasilyunderstandthatIshouldliketoburythenameofBridauunderallthemonumentsinPere-Lachaise。Mybrotherirritatesmebybringingthenameintopublicity。YouaretooknowingnottoseethesituationasIdo。Lookatitasifitwereyourown:ifyouwereadeputy,withatonguelikeyours,youwouldbeasmuchfearedasChauvelin;youwouldbemadeComteBixiou,anddirectoroftheBeaux- Arts。Oncethere,howshouldyoulikeitifyourgrandmotherDescoingsweretoturnup?Wouldyouwantthatworthywoman,wholookedlikeaMadameSaint-Leon,tobehangingontoyou?WouldyougiveheranarmintheTuileries,andpresenthertothenoblefamilyyouweretryingtoenter?Damnit,you’dwishhersixfeetunderground,inaleadennight-gown。Come,breakfastwithme,andletustalkofsomethingelse。Iamaparvenu,mydearfellow,andIknowit。Idon’tchoosethatmyswaddling-clothesshallbeseen。MysonwillbemorefortunatethanI;hewillbeagreatlord。Thescampwillwishmedead;Iexpectit,——orhewon’tbemyson。“ Herangthebell,andorderedtheservanttoservebreakfast。 “Thefashionableworldwouldn’tseeyouinyourmother’sbedroom,“ saidBixiou。“Whatwoulditcostyoutoseemtolovethatpoorwomanforafewhours?“ “Whew!“criedPhilippe,winking。“Soyoucomefromthem,doyou?I’manoldcamel,whoknowsallaboutgenuflections。MymothermakestheexcuseofherlastillnesstogetsomethingoutofmeforJoseph。No,thankyou!“ WhenBixiourelatedthisscenetoJoseph,thepoorpainterwaschilledtotheverysoul。 “DoesPhilippeknowIamill?“askedAgatheinapiteoustone,thedayafterBixiouhadrenderedanaccountofhisfruitlesserrand。 Josephlefttheroom,suffocatingwithemotion。TheAbbeLoraux,whowassittingbythebedsideofhispenitent,tookherhandandpressedit,andthenheanswered,“Alas!mychild,youhaveneverhadbutoneson。“ Thewords,whichAgatheunderstoodbuttoowell,conveyedashockwhichwasthebeginningoftheend。Shediedtwentyhourslater。 Inthedeliriumwhichprecededdeath,thewords,“WhomdoesPhilippetakeafter?“escapedher。 Josephfollowedhismothertothegravealone。Philippehadgone,onbusinessitwassaid,toOrleans;inreality,hewasdrivenfromParisbythefollowingletter,whichJosephwrotetohimamomentaftertheirmotherhadbreathedherlastsigh:—— Monster!mypoormotherhasdiedoftheshockyourlettercausedher。Wearmourning,butpretendillness;Iwillnotsufferherassassintostandatmysidebeforehercoffin。 JosephB。 Thepainter,whonolongerhadthehearttopaint,thoughhisbittergriefsorelyneededthemechanicaldistractionwhichlaboriswonttogive,wassurroundedbyfriendswhoagreedwithoneanothernevertoleavehimentirelyalone。ThusithappenedthatBixiou,wholovedJosephasmuchasasatiristcanloveanyone,wassittingintheatelierwithagroupofotherfriendsabouttwoweeksafterAgathe’sfuneral。Theservantenteredwithaletter,broughtbyanoldwoman,shesaid,whowaswaitingbelowfortheanswer。 Monsieur,——Toyou,whomIscarcelydaretocallmybrother,Iamforcedtoaddressmyself,ifonlyonaccountofthenameIbear—— Josephturnedthepageandreadthesignature。Thename“ComtesseFloredeBrambourg“madehimshudder。Heforesawsomenewatrocityonthepartofhisbrother。 “Thatbrigand,“hecried,“isthedevil’sown。Andhecallshimselfamanofhonor!Andhewearsalotofcrossesonhisbreast!Andhestrutsaboutatcourtinsteadofbeingbastinadoed!AndthescoundreliscalledMonsieurleComte!“ “Therearemanylikehim,“saidBixiou。 “Afterall,“saidJoseph,“theRabouilleusedeservesherfate,whateveritis。Sheisnotworthpitying;she’dhavehadmyneckwrunglikeachicken’swithoutsomuchassaying,’He’sinnocent。’“ Josephflungawaytheletter,butBixioucaughtitintheair,andreaditaloud,asfollows:—— IsitdecentthattheComtesseBridaudeBrambourgshoulddieinahospital,nomatterwhatmayhavebeenherfaults?Ifsuchistobemyfate,ifsuchisyourdeterminationandthatofmonsieurlecomte,sobeit;butifso,willyou,whoarethefriendofDoctorBianchon,askhimforapermittoletmeenterahospital? ThepersonwhocarriesthisletterhasbeenelevenconsecutivedaystothehoteldeBrambourg,ruedeClichy,withoutgettinganyhelpfrommyhusband。ThepovertyinwhichInowampreventsmyemployingalawyertomakealegaldemandforwhatisduetome,thatImaydiewithdecency。Nothingcansaveme,Iknowthat。Incaseyouareunwillingtoseeyourunhappysister-in-law,sendme,atleast,themoneytoendmydays。Yourbrotherdesiresmydeath; hehasalwaysdesiredit。Hewarnedmethatheknewthreewaysofkillingawoman,butIhadnotthesensetoforeseetheonehehasemployed。