BOOKI
Seldenpausedinsurprise。IntheafternoonrushoftheGrandCentralStationhiseyeshadbeenrefreshedbythesightofMissLilyBart。
ItwasaMondayinearlySeptember,andhewasreturningtohisworkfromahurrieddipintothecountry;butwhatwasMissBartdoingintownatthatseason?Ifshehadappearedtobecatchingatrain,hemighthaveinferredthathehadcomeonherintheactoftransitionbetweenoneandanotherofthecountry-houseswhichdisputedherpresenceafterthecloseoftheNewportseason;butherdesultoryairperplexedhim。Shestoodapartfromthecrowd,lettingitdriftbyhertotheplatformorthestreet,andwearinganairofirresolutionwhichmight,ashesurmised,bethemaskofaverydefinitepurpose。Itstruckhimatoncethatshewaswaitingforsomeone,buthehardlyknewwhytheideaarrestedhim。TherewasnothingnewaboutLilyBart,yethecouldneverseeherwithoutafaintmovementofinterest:itwascharacteristicofherthatshealwaysrousedspeculation,thathersimplestactsseemedtheresultoffar-reachingintentions。
Animpulseofcuriositymadehimturnoutofhisdirectlinetothedoor,andstrollpasther。Heknewthatifshedidnotwishtobeseenshewouldcontrivetoeludehim;anditamusedhimtothinkofputtingherskilltothetest。
\"Mr。Selden——whatgoodluck!\"
Shecameforwardsmiling,eageralmost,inherresolvetointercepthim。Oneortwopersons,inbrushingpastthem,lingeredtolook;forMissBartwasafiguretoarresteventhesuburbantravellerrushingtohislasttrain。
Seldenhadneverseenhermoreradiant。Hervividhead,relievedagainstthedulltintsofthecrowd,madehermoreconspicuousthaninaball-room,andunderherdarkhatandveilsheregainedthegirlishsmoothness,thepurityoftint,thatshewasbeginningtoloseafterelevenyearsoflatehoursandindefatigabledancing。Wasitreallyelevenyears,Seldenfoundhimselfwondering,andhadsheindeedreachedthenine-and-twentiethbirthdaywithwhichherrivalscreditedher?
\"Whatluck!\"sherepeated。\"Howniceofyoutocometomyrescue!\"
Herespondedjoyfullythattodosowashismissioninlife,andaskedwhatformtherescuewastotake。
\"Oh,almostany——eventosittingonabenchandtalkingtome。
Onesitsoutacotillion——whynotsitoutatrain?Itisn’tabithotterherethaninMrs。VanOsburgh’sconservatory——andsomeofthewomenarenotabituglier。\"Shebrokeoff,laughing,toexplainthatshehadcomeuptotownfromTuxedo,onherwaytotheGusTrenors’atBellomont,andhadmissedthethree-fifteentraintoRhinebeck。\"Andthereisn’tanothertillhalf-pastfive。\"Sheconsultedthelittlejewelledwatchamongherlaces。
\"Justtwohourstowait。AndIdon’tknowwhattodowithmyself。
Mymaidcameupthismorningtodosomeshoppingforme,andwastogoontoBellomontatoneo’clock,andmyaunt’shouseisclosed,andIdon’tknowasoulintown。\"Sheglancedplaintivelyaboutthestation。\"ItIShotterthanMrs。VanOsburgh’s,afterall。Ifyoucansparethetime,dotakemesomewhereforabreathofair。\"
Hedeclaredhimselfentirelyatherdisposal:theadventurestruckhimasdiverting。Asaspectator,hehadalwaysenjoyedLilyBart;andhiscourselaysofaroutofherorbitthatitamusedhimtobedrawnforamomentintothesuddenintimacywhichherproposalimplied。
\"ShallwegoovertoSherry’sforacupoftea?\"
Shesmiledassentingly,andthenmadeaslightgrimace。
\"SomanypeoplecomeuptotownonaMonday——oneissuretomeetalotofbores。I’masoldasthehills,ofcourse,anditoughtnottomakeanydifference;butifI’Moldenough,you’renot,\"
sheobjectedgaily。\"I’mdyingfortea——butisn’tthereaquieterplace?\"
Heansweredhersmile,whichrestedonhimvividly。Herdiscretionsinterestedhimalmostasmuchasherimprudences:hewassosurethatbothwerepartofthesamecarefully-elaboratedplan。InjudgingMissBart,hehadalwaysmadeuseofthe\"argumentfromdesign。\"
\"TheresourcesofNewYorkarerathermeagre,\"hesaid;\"butI’llfindahansomfirst,andthenwe’llinventsomething。\"Heledherthroughthethrongofreturningholiday-makers,pastsallow-facedgirlsinpreposteroushats,andflat-chestedwomenstrugglingwithpaperbundlesandpalm-leaffans。Wasitpossiblethatshebelongedtothesamerace?Thedinginess,thecrudityofthisaveragesectionofwomanhoodmadehimfeelhowhighlyspecializedshewas。
Arapidshowerhadcooledtheair,andcloudsstillhungrefreshinglyoverthemoiststreet。
\"Howdelicious!Letuswalkalittle,\"shesaidastheyemergedfromthestation。
TheyturnedintoMadisonAvenueandbegantostrollnorthward。Asshemovedbesidehim,withherlonglightstep,Seldenwasconsciousoftakingaluxuriouspleasureinhernearness:inthemodellingofherlittleear,thecrispupwardwaveofherhair——wasiteversoslightlybrightenedbyart?——andthethickplantingofherstraightblacklashes。Everythingaboutherwasatoncevigorousandexquisite,atoncestrongandfine。Hehadaconfusedsensethatshemusthavecostagreatdealtomake,thatagreatmanydullanduglypeoplemust,insomemysteriousway,havebeensacrificedtoproduceher。Hewasawarethatthequalitiesdistinguishingherfromtheherdofhersexwerechieflyexternal:asthoughafineglazeofbeautyandfastidiousnesshadbeenappliedtovulgarclay。Yettheanalogylefthimunsatisfied,foracoarsetexturewillnottakeahighfinish;andwasitnotpossiblethatthematerialwasfine,butthatcircumstancehadfashioneditintoafutileshape?
Ashereachedthispointinhisspeculationsthesuncameout,andherliftedparasolcutoffhisenjoyment。Amomentortwolatershepausedwithasigh。
\"Oh,dear,I’msohotandthirsty——andwhatahideousplaceNewYorkis!\"Shelookeddespairinglyupanddownthedrearythoroughfare。\"Othercitiesputontheirbestclothesinsummer,butNewYorkseemstositinitsshirtsleeves。\"Hereyeswandereddownoneoftheside-streets。\"Someonehashadthehumanitytoplantafewtreesoverthere。Letusgointotheshade。\"
\"Iamgladmystreetmeetswithyourapproval,\"saidSeldenastheyturnedthecorner。
\"Yourstreet?Doyoulivehere?\"
Sheglancedwithinterestalongthenewbrickandlimestonehouse-fronts,fantasticallyvariedinobediencetotheAmericancravingfornovelty,butfreshandinvitingwiththeirawningsandflower-boxes。
\"Ah,yes——tobesure:THEBENEDICK。Whatanice-lookingbuilding!
Idon’tthinkI’veeverseenitbefore。\"Shelookedacrossattheflat-housewithitsmarbleporchandpseudo-Georgianfacade。
\"Whichareyourwindows?Thosewiththeawningsdown?\"
\"Onthetopfloor——yes。\"
\"Andthatnicelittlebalconyisyours?Howcoolitlooksupthere!\"
Hepausedamoment。\"Comeupandsee,\"hesuggested。\"Icangiveyouacupofteainnotime——andyouwon’tmeetanybores。\"
Hercolourdeepened——shestillhadtheartofblushingattherighttime——butshetookthesuggestionaslightlyasitwasmade。
\"Whynot?It’stootempting——I’lltaketherisk,\"shedeclared。
\"Oh,I’mnotdangerous,\"hesaidinthesamekey。Intruth,hehadneverlikedheraswellasatthatmoment。Heknewshehadacceptedwithoutafterthought:hecouldneverbeafactorinhercalculations,andtherewasasurprise,arefreshmentalmost,inthespontaneityofherconsent。
Onthethresholdhepausedamoment,feelingforhislatchkey。
\"There’snoonehere;butIhaveaservantwhoissupposedtocomeinthemornings,andit’sjustpossiblehemayhaveputoutthetea-thingsandprovidedsomecake。\"
Heusheredherintoaslipofahallhungwitholdprints。Shenoticedthelettersandnotesheapedonthetableamonghisglovesandsticks;thenshefoundherselfinasmalllibrary,darkbutcheerful,withitswallsofbooks,apleasantlyfadedTurkeyrug,alittereddeskand,ashehadforetold,atea-trayonalowtablenearthewindow。Abreezehadsprungup,swayinginwardthemuslincurtains,andbringingafreshscentofmignonetteandpetuniasfromtheflower-boxonthebalcony。
Lilysankwithasighintooneoftheshabbyleatherchairs。
\"Howdelicioustohaveaplacelikethisalltoone’sself!Whatamiserablethingitistobeawoman。\"Sheleanedbackinaluxuryofdiscontent。
Seldenwasrummaginginacupboardforthecake。
\"Evenwomen,\"hesaid,\"havebeenknowntoenjoytheprivilegesofaflat。\"
\"Oh,governesses——orwidows。Butnotgirls——notpoor,miserable,marriageablegirls!\"
\"Ievenknowagirlwholivesinaflat。\"
Shesatupinsurprise。\"Youdo?\"
\"Ido,\"heassuredher,emergingfromthecupboardwiththesought-forcake。
\"Oh,Iknow——youmeanGertyFarish。\"Shesmiledalittleunkindly。\"ButIsaidMARRIAGEABLE——andbesides,shehasahorridlittleplace,andnomaid,andsuchqueerthingstoeat。Hercookdoesthewashingandthefoodtastesofsoap。Ishouldhatethat,youknow。\"
\"Youshouldn’tdinewithheronwash-days,\"saidSelden,cuttingthecake。
Theybothlaughed,andhekneltbythetabletolightthelampunderthekettle,whileshemeasuredouttheteaintoalittletea-potofgreenglaze。Ashewatchedherhand,polishedasabitofoldivory,withitsslenderpinknails,andthesapphirebraceletslippingoverherwrist,hewasstruckwiththeironyofsuggestingtohersuchalifeashiscousinGertrudeFarishhadchosen。Shewassoevidentlythevictimofthecivilizationwhichhadproducedher,thatthelinksofherbraceletseemedlikemanacleschaininghertoherfate。
Sheseemedtoreadhisthought。\"ItwashorridofmetosaythatofGerty,\"shesaidwithcharmingcompunction。\"Iforgotshewasyourcousin。Butwe’resodifferent,youknow:shelikesbeinggood,andIlikebeinghappy。Andbesides,sheisfreeandIamnot。IfIwere,IdaresayIcouldmanagetobehappyeveninherflat。Itmustbepureblisstoarrangethefurniturejustasonelikes,andgiveallthehorrorstotheash-man。IfIcouldonlydoovermyaunt’sdrawing-roomIknowIshouldbeabetterwoman。\"
\"Isitsoverybad?\"heaskedsympathetically。
Shesmiledathimacrossthetea-potwhichshewasholdinguptobefilled。
\"Thatshowshowseldomyoucomethere。Whydon’tyoucomeoftener?\"
\"WhenIdocome,it’snottolookatMrs。Peniston’sfurniture。\"
\"Nonsense,\"shesaid。\"Youdon’tcomeatall——andyetwegetonsowellwhenwemeet。\"
\"Perhapsthat’sthereason,\"heansweredpromptly。\"I’mafraidI
haven’tanycream,youknow——shallyoumindasliceoflemoninstead?\"
\"Ishalllikeitbetter。\"Shewaitedwhilehecutthelemonanddroppedathindiskintohercup。\"Butthatisnotthereason,\"
sheinsisted。
\"Thereasonforwhat?\"
\"Foryournevercoming。\"Sheleanedforwardwithashadeofperplexityinhercharmingeyes。\"IwishIknew——IwishIcouldmakeyouout。OfcourseIknowtherearemenwhodon’tlikeme——onecantellthatataglance。Andthereareotherswhoareafraidofme:theythinkIwanttomarrythem。\"Shesmiledupathimfrankly。
\"ButIdon’tthinkyoudislikeme——andyoucan’tpossiblythinkI
wanttomarryyou。\"
\"No——Iabsolveyouofthat,\"heagreed。
\"Well,then——?\"
Hehadcarriedhiscuptothefireplace,andstoodleaningagainstthechimney-pieceandlookingdownonherwithanairofindolentamusement。Theprovocationinhereyesincreasedhisamusement——hehadnotsupposedshewouldwasteherpowderonsuchsmallgame;butperhapsshewasonlykeepingherhandin;orperhapsagirlofhertypehadnoconversationbutofthepersonalkind。Atanyrate,shewasamazinglypretty,andhehadaskedhertoteaandmustliveuptohisobligations。
\"Well,then,\"hesaidwithaplunge,\"perhapsTHAT’Sthereason。\"
\"What?\"
\"Thefactthatyoudon’twanttomarryme。PerhapsIdon’tregarditassuchastronginducementtogoandseeyou。\"Hefeltaslightshiverdownhisspineasheventuredthis,butherlaughreassuredhim。
\"DearMr。Selden,thatwasn’tworthyofyou。It’sstupidofyoutomakelovetome,anditisn’tlikeyoutobestupid。\"Sheleanedback,sippingherteawithanairsoenchantinglyjudicialthat,iftheyhadbeeninheraunt’sdrawing-room,hemightalmosthavetriedtodisproveherdeduction。
\"Don’tyousee,\"shecontinued,\"thattherearemenenoughtosaypleasantthingstome,andthatwhatIwantisafriendwhowon’tbeafraidtosaydisagreeableoneswhenIneedthem?SometimesI
havefanciedyoumightbethatfriend——Idon’tknowwhy,exceptthatyouareneitheraprignorabounder,andthatIshouldn’thavetopretendwithyouorbeonmyguardagainstyou。\"Hervoicehaddroppedtoanoteofseriousness,andshesatgazingupathimwiththetroubledgravityofachild。
\"Youdon’tknowhowmuchIneedsuchafriend,\"shesaid。\"Myauntisfullofcopy-bookaxioms,buttheywereallmeanttoapplytoconductintheearlyfifties。Ialwaysfeelthattoliveuptothemwouldincludewearingbook-muslinwithgigotsleeves。
Andtheotherwomen——mybestfriends——well,theyusemeorabuseme;buttheydon’tcareastrawwhathappenstome。I’vebeenabouttoolong——peoplearegettingtiredofme;theyarebeginningtosayIoughttomarry。\"
Therewasamoment’spause,duringwhichSeldenmeditatedoneortworepliescalculatedtoaddamomentaryzesttothesituation;
butherejectedtheminfavourofthesimplequestion:\"Well,whydon’tyou?\"
Shecolouredandlaughed。\"Ah,IseeyouAREafriendafterall,andthatisoneofthedisagreeablethingsIwasaskingfor。\"
\"Itwasn’tmeanttobedisagreeable,\"hereturnedamicably。
\"Isn’tmarriageyourvocation?Isn’titwhatyou’reallbroughtupfor?\"
Shesighed。\"Isupposeso。Whatelseisthere?\"
\"Exactly。Andsowhynottaketheplungeandhaveitover?\"
Sheshruggedhershoulders。\"YouspeakasifIoughttomarrythefirstmanwhocamealong。\"
\"Ididn’tmeantoimplythatyouareashardputtoitasthat。Buttheremustbesomeonewiththerequisitequalifications。\"
Sheshookherheadwearily。\"IthrewawayoneortwogoodchanceswhenIfirstcameout——Isupposeeverygirldoes;andyouknowI
amhorriblypoor——andveryexpensive。Imusthaveagreatdealofmoney。\"
Seldenhadturnedtoreachforacigarette-boxonthemantelpiece。
\"What’sbecomeofDillworth?\"heasked。
\"Oh,hismotherwasfrightened——shewasafraidIshouldhaveallthefamilyjewelsreset。AndshewantedmetopromisethatI
wouldn’tdooverthedrawing-room。\"
\"Theverythingyouaremarryingfor!\"
\"Exactly。SoshepackedhimofftoIndia。\"
\"Hardluck——butyoucandobetterthanDillworth。\"
Heofferedthebox,andshetookoutthreeorfourcigarettes,puttingonebetweenherlipsandslippingtheothersintoalittlegoldcaseattachedtoherlongpearlchain。
\"HaveItime?Justawhiff,then。\"Sheleanedforward,holdingthetipofhercigarettetohis。Asshedidso,henoted,withapurelyimpersonalenjoyment,howevenlytheblacklashesweresetinhersmoothwhitelids,andhowthepurplishshadebeneaththemmeltedintothepurepallourofthecheek。
Shebegantosaunterabouttheroom,examiningthebookshelvesbetweenthepuffsofhercigarette-smoke。Someofthevolumeshadtheripetintsofgoodtoolingandoldmorocco,andhereyeslingeredonthemcaressingly,notwiththeappreciationoftheexpert,butwiththepleasureinagreeabletonesandtexturesthatwasoneofherinmostsusceptibilities。Suddenlyherexpressionchangedfromdesultoryenjoymenttoactiveconjecture,andsheturnedtoSeldenwithaquestion。
\"Youcollect,don’tyou——youknowaboutfirsteditionsandthings?\"
\"Asmuchasamanmaywhohasnomoneytospend。NowandthenI
pickupsomethingintherubbishheap;andIgoandlookonatthebigsales。\"
Shehadagainaddressedherselftotheshelves,buthereyesnowswepttheminattentively,andhesawthatshewaspreoccupiedwithanewidea。
\"AndAmericana——doyoucollectAmericana?\"
Seldenstaredandlaughed。
\"No,that’sratheroutofmyline。I’mnotreallyacollector,yousee;IsimplyliketohavegoodeditionsofthebooksIamfondof。\"
Shemadeaslightgrimace。\"AndAmericanaarehorriblydull,I
suppose?\"
\"Ishouldfancyso——excepttothehistorian。Butyourrealcollectorvaluesathingforitsrarity。Idon’tsupposethebuyersofAmericanasitupreadingthemallnight——oldJeffersonGrycecertainlydidn’t。\"
Shewaslisteningwithkeenattention。\"Andyettheyfetchfabulousprices,don’tthey?Itseemssooddtowanttopayalotforanuglybadly-printedbookthatoneisnevergoingtoread!
AndIsupposemostoftheownersofAmericanaarenothistorianseither?\"
\"No;veryfewofthehistorianscanaffordtobuythem。Theyhavetousethoseinthepubliclibrariesorinprivatecollections。
Itseemstobethemereraritythatattractstheaveragecollector。\"
Hehadseatedhimselfonanarmofthechairnearwhichshewasstanding,andshecontinuedtoquestionhim,askingwhichweretherarestvolumes,whethertheJeffersonGrycecollectionwasreallyconsideredthefinestintheworld,andwhatwasthelargestpriceeverfetchedbyasinglevolume。
Itwassopleasanttosittherelookingupather,assheliftednowonebookandthenanotherfromtheshelves,flutteringthepagesbetweenherfingers,whileherdroopingprofilewasoutlinedagainstthewarmbackgroundofoldbindings,thathetalkedonwithoutpausingtowonderathersuddeninterestinsounsuggestiveasubject。Buthecouldneverbelongwithherwithouttryingtofindareasonforwhatshewasdoing,andasshereplacedhisfirsteditionofLaBruyereandturnedawayfromthebookcases,hebegantoaskhimselfwhatshehadbeendrivingat。Hernextquestionwasnotofanaturetoenlightenhim。Shepausedbeforehimwithasmilewhichseemedatoncedesignedtoadmithimtoherfamiliarity,andtoremindhimoftherestrictionsitimposed。
\"Don’tyouevermind,\"sheaskedsuddenly,\"notbeingrichenoughtobuyallthebooksyouwant?\"
Hefollowedherglanceabouttheroom,withitswornfurnitureandshabbywalls。
\"Don’tIjust?Doyoutakemeforasaintonapillar?\"
\"Andhavingtowork——doyoumindthat?\"
\"Oh,theworkitselfisnotsobad——I’mratherfondofthelaw。\"
\"No;butthebeingtieddown:theroutine——don’tyoueverwanttogetaway,toseenewplacesandpeople?\"
\"Horribly——especiallywhenIseeallmyfriendsrushingtothesteamer。\"
Shedrewasympatheticbreath。\"Butdoyoumindenough——tomarrytogetoutofit?\"
Seldenbrokeintoalaugh。\"Godforbid!\"hedeclared。
Sherosewithasigh,tossinghercigaretteintothegrate。
\"Ah,there’sthedifference——agirlmust,amanmayifhechooses。\"Shesurveyedhimcritically。\"Yourcoat’salittleshabby——butwhocares?Itdoesn’tkeeppeoplefromaskingyoutodine。IfIwereshabbynoonewouldhaveme:awomanisaskedoutasmuchforherclothesasforherself。Theclothesarethebackground,theframe,ifyoulike:theydon’tmakesuccess,buttheyareapartofit。Whowantsadingywoman?Weareexpectedtobeprettyandwell-dressedtillwedrop——andifwecan’tkeepitupalone,wehavetogointopartnership。\"
Seldenglancedatherwithamusement:itwasimpossible,evenwithherlovelyeyesimploringhim,totakeasentimentalviewofhercase。
\"Ah,well,theremustbeplentyofcapitalonthelook-outforsuchaninvestment。Perhapsyou’llmeetyourfatetonightattheTrenors’。\"
Shereturnedhislookinterrogatively。
\"Ithoughtyoumightbegoingthere——oh,notinthatcapacity!
Buttherearetobealotofyourset——GwenVanOsburgh,theWetheralls,LadyCressidaRaith——andtheGeorgeDorsets。\"
Shepausedamomentbeforethelastname,andshotaquerythroughherlashes;butheremainedimperturbable。
\"Mrs。Trenoraskedme;butIcan’tgetawaytilltheendoftheweek;andthosebigpartiesboreme。\"
\"Ah,sotheydome,\"sheexclaimed。
\"Thenwhygo?\"
\"It’spartofthebusiness——youforget!Andbesides,ifIdidn’t,IshouldbeplayingbeziquewithmyauntatRichfieldSprings。\"
\"That’salmostasbadasmarryingDillworth,\"heagreed,andtheybothlaughedforpurepleasureintheirsuddenintimacy。
Sheglancedattheclock。
\"Dearme!Imustbeoff。It’safterfive。\"
Shepausedbeforethemantelpiece,studyingherselfinthemirrorwhilesheadjustedherveil。Theattituderevealedthelongslopeofherslendersides,whichgaveakindofwild-woodgracetoheroutline——asthoughshewereacaptureddryadsubduedtotheconventionsofthedrawing-room;andSeldenreflectedthatitwasthesamestreakofsylvanfreedominhernaturethatlentsuchsavourtoherartificiality。
Hefollowedheracrosstheroomtotheentrance-hall;butonthethresholdsheheldoutherhandwithagestureofleave-taking。
\"It’sbeendelightful;andnowyouwillhavetoreturnmyvisit。\"
\"Butdon’tyouwantmetoseeyoutothestation?\"
\"No;goodbyehere,please。\"
Sheletherhandlieinhisamoment,smilingupathimadorably。
\"Goodbye,then——andgoodluckatBellomont!\"hesaid,openingthedoorforher。
Onthelandingshepausedtolookabouther。Therewereathousandchancestooneagainsthermeetinganybody,butonecouldnevertell,andshealwayspaidforherrareindiscretionsbyaviolentreactionofprudence。Therewasnooneinsight,however,butachar-womanwhowasscrubbingthestairs。HerownstoutpersonanditssurroundingimplementstookupsomuchroomthatLily,topassher,hadtogatherupherskirtsandbrushagainstthewall。Asshedidso,thewomanpausedinherworkandlookedupcuriously,restingherclenchedredfistsonthewetclothshehadjustdrawnfromherpail。Shehadabroadsallowface,slightlypittedwithsmall-pox,andthinstraw-colouredhairthroughwhichherscalpshoneunpleasantly。
\"Ibegyourpardon,\"saidLily,intendingbyherpolitenesstoconveyacriticismoftheother’smanner。
Thewoman,withoutanswering,pushedherpailaside,andcontinuedtostareasMissBartsweptbywithamurmurofsilkenlinings。Lilyfeltherselfflushingunderthelook。Whatdidthecreaturesuppose?Couldoneneverdothesimplest,themostharmlessthing,withoutsubjectingone’sselftosomeodiousconjecture?Halfwaydownthenextflight,shesmiledtothinkthatachar-woman’sstareshouldsoperturbher。Thepoorthingwasprobablydazzledbysuchanunwontedapparition。ButWERE
suchapparitionsunwontedonSelden’sstairs?MissBartwasnotfamiliarwiththemoralcodeofbachelors’flat-houses,andhercolourroseagainasitoccurredtoherthatthewoman’spersistentgazeimpliedagropingamongpastassociations。Butsheputasidethethoughtwithasmileatherownfears,andhasteneddownward,wonderingifsheshouldfindacabshortofFifthAvenue。
UndertheGeorgianporchshepausedagain,scanningthestreetforahansom。Nonewasinsight,butasshereachedthesidewalksheranagainstasmallglossy-lookingmanwithagardeniainhiscoat,whoraisedhishatwithasurprisedexclamation。
\"MissBart?Well——ofallpeople!ThisISluck,\"hedeclared;andshecaughtatwinkleofamusedcuriositybetweenhisscrewed-uplids。
\"Oh,Mr。Rosedale——howareyou?\"shesaid,perceivingthattheirrepressibleannoyanceonherfacewasreflectedinthesuddenintimacyofhissmile。
Mr。Rosedalestoodscanningherwithinterestandapproval。HewasaplumprosymanoftheblondJewishtype,withsmartLondonclothesfittinghimlikeupholstery,andsmallsidelongeyeswhichgavehimtheairofappraisingpeopleasiftheywerebric-a-brac。HeglancedupinterrogativelyattheporchoftheBenedick。
\"Beenuptotownforalittleshopping,Isuppose?\"hesaid,inatonewhichhadthefamiliarityofatouch。
MissBartshrankfromitslightly,andthenflungherselfintoprecipitateexplanations。
\"Yes——Icameuptoseemydress-maker。IamjustonmywaytocatchthetraintotheTrenors’。\"
\"Ah——yourdress-maker;justso,\"hesaidblandly。\"Ididn’tknowtherewereanydress-makersintheBenedick。\"
\"TheBenedick?\"Shelookedgentlypuzzled。\"Isthatthenameofthisbuilding?\"
\"Yes,that’sthename:Ibelieveit’sanoldwordforbachelor,isn’tit?Ihappentoownthebuilding——that’sthewayIknow。\"
Hissmiledeepenedasheaddedwithincreasingassurance:\"Butyoumustletmetakeyoutothestation。TheTrenorsareatBellomont,ofcourse?You’vebarelytimetocatchthefive-forty。
Thedress-makerkeptyouwaiting,Isuppose。\"
Lilystiffenedunderthepleasantry。
\"Oh,thanks,\"shestammered;andatthatmomenthereyecaughtahansomdriftingdownMadisonAvenue,andshehaileditwithadesperategesture。
\"You’reverykind;butIcouldn’tthinkoftroublingyou,\"shesaid,extendingherhandtoMr。Rosedale;andheedlessofhisprotestations,shesprangintotherescuingvehicle,andcalledoutabreathlessordertothedriver。
Inthehansomsheleanedbackwithasigh。Whymustagirlpaysodearlyforherleastescapefromroutine?Whycouldoneneverdoanaturalthingwithouthavingtoscreenitbehindastructureofartifice?ShehadyieldedtoapassingimpulseingoingtoLawrenceSelden’srooms,anditwassoseldomthatshecouldallowherselftheluxuryofanimpulse!Thisone,atanyrate,wasgoingtocostherrathermorethanshecouldafford。Shewasvexedtoseethat,inspiteofsomanyyearsofvigilance,shehadblunderedtwicewithinfiveminutes。Thatstupidstoryaboutherdress-makerwasbadenough——itwouldhavebeensosimpletotellRosedalethatshehadbeentakingteawithSelden!Themerestatementofthefactwouldhaverendereditinnocuous。But,afterhavingletherselfbesurprisedinafalsehood,itwasdoublystupidtosnubthewitnessofherdiscomfiture。IfshehadhadthepresenceofmindtoletRosedaledrivehertothestation,theconcessionmighthavepurchasedhissilence。Hehadhisrace’saccuracyintheappraisalofvalues,andtobeseenwalkingdowntheplatformatthecrowdedafternoonhourinthecompanyofMissLilyBartwouldhavebeenmoneyinhispocket,ashemighthimselfhavephrasedit。Heknew,ofcourse,thattherewouldbealargehouse-partyatBellomont,andthepossibilityofbeingtakenforoneofMrs。Trenor’sguestswasdoubtlessincludedinhiscalculations。Mr。Rosedalewasstillatastageinhissocialascentwhenitwasofimportancetoproducesuchimpressions。
TheprovokingpartwasthatLilyknewallthis——knewhoweasyitwouldhavebeentosilencehimonthespot,andhowdifficultitmightbetodosoafterward。Mr。SimonRosedalewasamanwhomadeithisbusinesstoknoweverythingabouteveryone,whoseideaofshowinghimselftobeathomeinsocietywastodisplayaninconvenientfamiliaritywiththehabitsofthosewithwhomhewishedtobethoughtintimate。Lilywassurethatwithintwenty-fourhoursthestoryofhervisitingherdress-makerattheBenedickwouldbeinactivecirculationamongMr。Rosedale’sacquaintances。Theworstofitwasthatshehadalwayssnubbedandignoredhim。Onhisfirstappearance——whenherimprovidentcousin,JackStepney,hadobtainedforhim(inreturnforfavourstooeasilyguessed)acardtooneofthevastimpersonalVanOsburgh\"crushes\"——Rosedale,withthatmixtureofartisticsensibilityandbusinessastutenesswhichcharacterizeshisrace,hadinstantlygravitatedtowardMissBart。Sheunderstoodhismotives,forherowncoursewasguidedbyasnicecalculations。Trainingandexperiencehadtaughthertobehospitabletonewcomers,sincethemostunpromisingmightbeusefullateron,andtherewereplentyofavailableOUBLIETTEStoswallowthemiftheywerenot。Butsomeintuitiverepugnance,gettingthebetterofyearsofsocialdiscipline,hadmadeherpushMr。RosedaleintohisOUBLIETTEwithoutatrial。Hehadleftbehindonlytherippleofamusementwhichhisspeedydespatchhadcausedamongherfriends;andthoughlater(toshiftthemetaphor)hereappearedlowerdownthestream,itwasonlyinfleetingglimpses,withlongsubmergencesbetween。
HithertoLilyhadbeenundisturbedbyscruples。InherlittlesetMr。Rosedalehadbeenpronounced\"impossible,\"andJackStepneyroundlysnubbedforhisattempttopayhisdebtsindinnerinvitations。EvenMrs。Trenor,whosetasteforvarietyhadledherintosomehazardousexperiments,resistedJack’sattemptstodisguiseMr。Rosedaleasanovelty,anddeclaredthathewasthesamelittleJewwhohadbeenservedupandrejectedatthesocialboardadozentimeswithinhermemory;andwhileJudyTrenorwasobduratetherewassmallchanceofMr。Rosedale’spenetratingbeyondtheouterlimbooftheVanOsburghcrushes。Jackgaveupthecontestwithalaughing\"You’llsee,\"and,stickingmanfullytohisguns,showedhimselfwithRosedaleatthefashionablerestaurants,incompanywiththepersonallyvividifsociallyobscureladieswhoareavailableforsuchpurposes。Buttheattempthadhithertobeenvain,andasRosedaleundoubtedlypaidforthedinners,thelaughremainedwithhisdebtor。
Mr。Rosedale,itwillbeseen,wasthusfarnotafactortobefeared——unlessoneputone’sselfinhispower。AndthiswaspreciselywhatMissBarthaddone。Herclumsyfibhadlethimseethatshehadsomethingtoconceal;andshewassurehehadascoretosettlewithher。Somethinginhissmiletoldherhehadnotforgotten。Sheturnedfromthethoughtwithalittleshiver,butithungonherallthewaytothestation,anddoggedherdowntheplatformwiththepersistencyofMr。Rosedalehimself。
Shehadjusttimetotakeherseatbeforethetrainstarted;buthavingarrangedherselfinhercornerwiththeinstinctivefeelingforeffectwhichneverforsookher,sheglancedaboutinthehopeofseeingsomeothermemberoftheTrenors’party。Shewantedtogetawayfromherself,andconversationwastheonlymeansofescapethatsheknew。
Hersearchwasrewardedbythediscoveryofaveryblondyoungmanwithasoftreddishbeard,who,attheotherendofthecarriage,appearedtobedissemblinghimselfbehindanunfoldednewspaper。Lily’seyebrightened,andafaintsmilerelaxedthedrawnlinesofhermouth。ShehadknownthatMr。PercyGrycewastobeatBellomont,butshehadnotcountedontheluckofhavinghimtoherselfinthetrain;andthefactbanishedallperturbingthoughtsofMr。Rosedale。Perhaps,afterall,thedaywastoendmorefavourablythanithadbegun。
Shebegantocutthepagesofanovel,tranquillystudyingherpreythroughdowncastlasheswhilesheorganizedamethodofattack。Somethinginhisattitudeofconsciousabsorptiontoldherthathewasawareofherpresence:noonehadeverbeenquitesoengrossedinaneveningpaper!Sheguessedthathewastooshytocomeuptoher,andthatshewouldhavetodevisesomemeansofapproachwhichshouldnotappeartobeanadvanceonherpart。
ItamusedhertothinkthatanyoneasrichasMr。PercyGryceshouldbeshy;butshewasgiftedwithtreasuresofindulgenceforsuchidiosyncrasies,andbesides,histimiditymightserveherpurposebetterthantoomuchassurance。Shehadtheartofgivingself-confidencetotheembarrassed,butshewasnotequallysureofbeingabletoembarrasstheself-confident。
Shewaitedtillthetrainhademergedfromthetunnelandwasracingbetweentheraggededgesofthenorthernsuburbs。Then,asitlowereditsspeednearYonkers,sherosefromherseatanddriftedslowlydownthecarriage。AsshepassedMr。Gryce,thetraingavealurch,andhewasawareofaslenderhandgrippingthebackofhischair。Herosewithastart,hisingenuousfacelookingasthoughithadbeendippedincrimson:eventhereddishtintinhisbeardseemedtodeepen。Thetrainswayedagain,almostflingingMissBartintohisarms。
Shesteadiedherselfwithalaughanddrewback;buthewasenvelopedinthescentofherdress,andhisshoulderhadfeltherfugitivetouch。
\"Oh,Mr。Gryce,isityou?I’msosorry——Iwastryingtofindtheporterandgetsometea。\"
Sheheldoutherhandasthetrainresumeditslevelrush,andtheystoodexchangingafewwordsintheaisle。Yes——hewasgoingtoBellomont。Hehadheardshewastobeoftheparty——heblushedagainasheadmittedit。Andwashetobethereforawholeweek?
Howdelightful!
Butatthispointoneortwobelatedpassengersfromthelaststationforcedtheirwayintothecarriage,andLilyhadtoretreattoherseat。
\"Thechairnexttomineisempty——dotakeit,\"shesaidoverhershoulder;andMr。Gryce,withconsiderableembarrassment,succeededineffectinganexchangewhichenabledhimtotransporthimselfandhisbagstoherside。
\"Ah——andhereistheporter,andperhapswecanhavesometea。\"
Shesignalledtothatofficial,andinamoment,withtheeasethatseemedtoattendthefulfilmentofallherwishes,alittletablehadbeensetupbetweentheseats,andshehadhelpedMr。
Grycetobestowhisencumberingpropertiesbeneathit。
Whentheteacamehewatchedherinsilentfascinationwhileherhandsflittedabovethetray,lookingmiraculouslyfineandslenderincontrasttothecoarsechinaandlumpybread。Itseemedwonderfultohimthatanyoneshouldperformwithsuchcarelesseasethedifficulttaskofmakingteainpublicinalurchingtrain。Hewouldneverhavedaredtoorderitforhimself,lestheshouldattractthenoticeofhisfellow-passengers;but,secureintheshelterofherconspicuousness,hesippedtheinkydraughtwithadelicioussenseofexhilaration。
Lily,withtheflavourofSelden’scaravanteaonherlips,hadnogreatfancytodrownitintherailwaybrewwhichseemedsuchnectartohercompanion;but,rightlyjudgingthatoneofthecharmsofteaisthefactofdrinkingittogether,sheproceededtogivethelasttouchtoMr。Gryce’senjoymentbysmilingathimacrossherliftedcup。
\"Isitquiteright——Ihaven’tmadeittoostrong?\"sheaskedsolicitously;andherepliedwithconvictionthathehadnevertastedbettertea。
\"Idaresayitistrue,\"shereflected;andherimaginationwasfiredbythethoughtthatMr。Gryce,whomighthavesoundedthedepthsofthemostcomplexself-indulgence,wasperhapsactuallytakinghisfirstjourneyalonewithaprettywoman。
Itstruckherasprovidentialthatsheshouldbetheinstrumentofhisinitiation。Somegirlswouldnothaveknownhowtomanagehim。Theywouldhaveover-emphasizedthenoveltyoftheadventure,tryingtomakehimfeelinitthezestofanescapade。
ButLily’smethodsweremoredelicate。SherememberedthathercousinJackStepneyhadoncedefinedMr。Gryceastheyoungmanwhohadpromisedhismothernevertogooutintherainwithouthisovershoes;andactingonthishint,sheresolvedtoimpartagentlydomesticairtothescene,inthehopethathercompanion,insteadoffeelingthathewasdoingsomethingrecklessorunusual,wouldmerelybeledtodwellontheadvantageofalwayshavingacompaniontomakeone’steainthetrain。
Butinspiteofherefforts,conversationflaggedafterthetrayhadbeenremoved,andshewasdriventotakeafreshmeasurementofMr。Gryce’slimitations。Itwasnot,afterall,opportunitybutimaginationthathelacked:hehadamentalpalatewhichwouldneverlearntodistinguishbetweenrailwayteaandnectar。
Therewas,however,onetopicshecouldrelyon:onespringthatshehadonlytotouchtosethissimplemachineryinmotion。Shehadrefrainedfromtouchingitbecauseitwasalastresource,andshehadreliedonotherartstostimulateothersensations;
butasasettledlookofdulnessbegantocreepoverhiscandidfeatures,shesawthatextrememeasureswerenecessary。
\"Andhow,\"shesaid,leaningforward,\"areyougettingonwithyourAmericana?\"
Hiseyebecameadegreelessopaque:itwasasthoughanincipientfilmhadbeenremovedfromit,andshefelttheprideofaskilfuloperator。
\"I’vegotafewnewthings,\"hesaid,suffusedwithpleasure,butloweringhisvoiceasthoughhefearedhisfellow-passengersmightbeinleaguetodespoilhim。
Shereturnedasympatheticenquiry,andgraduallyhewasdrawnontotalkofhislatestpurchases。Itwastheonesubjectwhichenabledhimtoforgethimself,orallowedhim,rather,torememberhimselfwithoutconstraint,becausehewasathomeinit,andcouldassertasuperioritythattherewerefewtodispute。HardlyanyofhisacquaintancescaredforAmericana,orknewanythingaboutthem;andtheconsciousnessofthisignorancethrewMr。Gryce’sknowledgeintoagreeablerelief。Theonlydifficultywastointroducethetopicandtokeepittothefront;mostpeopleshowednodesiretohavetheirignorancedispelled,andMr。Grycewaslikeamerchantwhosewarehousesarecrammedwithanunmarketablecommodity。
ButMissBart,itappeared,reallydidwanttoknowaboutAmericana;andmoreover,shewasalreadysufficientlyinformedtomakethetaskoffartherinstructionaseasyasitwasagreeable。
Shequestionedhimintelligently,sheheardhimsubmissively;
and,preparedforthelookoflassitudewhichusuallycreptoverhislisteners’faces,hegreweloquentunderherreceptivegaze。
The\"points\"shehadhadthepresenceofmindtogleanfromSelden,inanticipationofthisverycontingency,wereservinghertosuchgoodpurposethatshebegantothinkhervisittohimhadbeentheluckiestincidentoftheday。Shehadoncemoreshownhertalentforprofitingbytheunexpected,anddangeroustheoriesastotheadvisabilityofyieldingtoimpulseweregerminatingunderthesurfaceofsmilingattentionwhichshecontinuedtopresenttohercompanion。
Mr。Gryce’ssensations,iflessdefinite,wereequallyagreeable。
Hefelttheconfusedtitillationwithwhichthelowerorganismswelcomethegratificationoftheirneeds,andallhissensesflounderedinavaguewell-being,throughwhichMissBart’spersonalitywasdimlybutpleasantlyperceptible。
Mr。Gryce’sinterestinAmericanahadnotoriginatedwithhimself:itwasimpossibletothinkofhimasevolvinganytasteofhisown。Anunclehadlefthimacollectionalreadynotedamongbibliophiles;theexistenceofthecollectionwastheonlyfactthathadevershedgloryonthenameofGryce,andthenephewtookasmuchprideinhisinheritanceasthoughithadbeenhisownwork。Indeed,hegraduallycametoregarditassuch,andtofeelasenseofpersonalcomplacencywhenhechancedonanyreferencetotheGryceAmericana。Anxiousashewastoavoidpersonalnotice,hetook,intheprintedmentionofhisname,apleasuresoexquisiteandexcessivethatitseemedacompensationforhisshrinkingfrompublicity。
Toenjoythesensationasoftenaspossible,hesubscribedtoallthereviewsdealingwithbook-collectingingeneral,andAmericanhistoryinparticular,andasallusionstohislibraryaboundedinthepagesofthesejournals,whichformedhisonlyreading,hecametoregardhimselfasfiguringprominentlyinthepubliceye,andtoenjoythethoughtoftheinterestwhichwouldbeexcitedifthepersonshemetinthestreet,orsatamongintravelling,weresuddenlytobetoldthathewasthepossessoroftheGryceAmericana。
Mosttimiditieshavesuchsecretcompensations,andMissBartwasdiscerningenoughtoknowthattheinnervanityisgenerallyinproportiontotheouterself-depreciation。Withamoreconfidentpersonshewouldnothavedaredtodwellsolongononetopic,ortoshowsuchexaggeratedinterestinit;butshehadrightlyguessedthatMr。Gryce’segoismwasathirstysoil,requiringconstantnurturefromwithout。MissBarthadthegiftoffollowinganundercurrentofthoughtwhilesheappearedtobesailingonthesurfaceofconversation;andinthiscasehermentalexcursiontooktheformofarapidsurveyofMr。PercyGryce’sfutureascombinedwithherown。TheGryceswerefromAlbany,andbutlatelyintroducedtothemetropolis,wherethemotherandsonhadcome,afteroldJeffersonGryce’sdeath,totakepossessionofhishouseinMadisonAvenue——anappallinghouse,allbrownstonewithoutandblackwalnutwithin,withtheGrycelibraryinafire-proofannexthatlookedlikeamausoleum。
Lily,however,knewallaboutthem:youngMr。Gryce’sarrivalhadflutteredthematernalbreastsofNewYork,andwhenagirlhasnomothertopalpitateforhershemustneedsbeonthealertforherself。Lily,therefore,hadnotonlycontrivedtoputherselfintheyoungman’sway,buthadmadetheacquaintanceofMrs。Gryce,amonumentalwomanwiththevoiceofapulpitoratorandamindpreoccupiedwiththeiniquitiesofherservants,whocamesometimestositwithMrs。Penistonandlearnfromthatladyhowshemanagedtopreventthekitchen-maid’ssmugglinggroceriesoutofthehouse。Mrs。Grycehadakindofimpersonalbenevolence:casesofindividualneedsheregardedwithsuspicion,butshesubscribedtoInstitutionswhentheirannualreportsshowedanimpressivesurplus。Herdomesticdutiesweremanifold,fortheyextendedfromfurtiveinspectionsoftheservants’bedroomstounannounceddescentstothecellar;butshehadneverallowedherselfmanypleasures。Once,however,shehadhadaspecialeditionoftheSarumRuleprintedinrubricandpresentedtoeveryclergymaninthediocese;andthegiltalbuminwhichtheirlettersofthankswerepastedformedthechiefornamentofherdrawing-roomtable。
Percyhadbeenbroughtupintheprincipleswhichsoexcellentawomanwassuretoinculcate。Everyformofprudenceandsuspicionhadbeengraftedonanatureoriginallyreluctantandcautious,withtheresultthatitwouldhaveseemedhardlyneedfulforMrs。
Grycetoextracthispromiseabouttheovershoes,solittlelikelywashetohazardhimselfabroadintherain。Afterattaininghismajority,andcomingintothefortunewhichthelateMr。Grycehadmadeoutofapatentdeviceforexcludingfreshairfromhotels,theyoungmancontinuedtolivewithhismotherinAlbany;butonJeffersonGryce’sdeath,whenanotherlargepropertypassedintoherson’shands,Mrs。Grycethoughtthatwhatshecalledhis\"interests\"demandedhispresenceinNewYork。SheaccordinglyinstalledherselfintheMadisonAvenuehouse,andPercy,whosesenseofdutywasnotinferiortohismother’s,spentallhisweekdaysinthehandsomeBroadStreetofficewhereabatchofpalemenonsmallsalarieshadgrowngreyinthemanagementoftheGryceestate,andwherehewasinitiatedwithbecomingreverenceintoeverydetailoftheartofaccumulation。
AsfarasLilycouldlearn,thishadhithertobeenMr。Gryce’sonlyoccupation,andshemighthavebeenpardonedforthinkingitnottoohardatasktointerestayoungmanwhohadbeenkeptonsuchlowdiet。Atanyrate,shefeltherselfsocompletelyincommandofthesituationthatsheyieldedtoasenseofsecurityinwhichallfearofMr。Rosedale,andofthedifficultiesonwhichthatfearwascontingent,vanishedbeyondtheedgeofthought。
ThestoppingofthetrainatGarrisonswouldnothavedistractedherfromthesethoughts,hadshenotcaughtasuddenlookofdistressinhercompanion’seye。Hisseatfacedtowardthedoor,andsheguessedthathehadbeenperturbedbytheapproachofanacquaintance;afactconfirmedbytheturningofheadsandgeneralsenseofcommotionwhichherownentranceintoarailway-carriagewasapttoproduce。
Sheknewthesymptomsatonce,andwasnotsurprisedtobehailedbythehighnotesofaprettywoman,whoenteredthetrainaccompaniedbyamaid,abull-terrier,andafootmanstaggeringunderaloadofbagsanddressing-cases。
\"Oh,Lily——areyougoingtoBellomont?Thenyoucan’tletmehaveyourseat,Isuppose?ButIMUSThaveaseatinthiscarriage——porter,youmustfindmeaplaceatonce。Can’tsomeonebeputsomewhereelse?Iwanttobewithmyfriends。Oh,howdoyoudo,Mr。Gryce?DopleasemakehimunderstandthatImusthaveaseatnexttoyouandLily。\"
Mrs。GeorgeDorset,regardlessofthemildeffortsofatravellerwithacarpet-bag,whowasdoinghisbesttomakeroomforherbygettingoutofthetrain,stoodinthemiddleoftheaisle,diffusingaboutherthatgeneralsenseofexasperationwhichaprettywomanonhertravelsnotinfrequentlycreates。
ShewassmallerandthinnerthanLilyBart,witharestlesspliabilityofpose,asifshecouldhavebeencrumpledupandrunthrougharing,likethesinuousdraperiessheaffected。Hersmallpalefaceseemedthemeresettingofapairofdarkexaggeratedeyes,ofwhichthevisionarygazecontrastedcuriouslywithherself-assertivetoneandgestures;sothat,asoneofherfriendsobserved,shewaslikeadisembodiedspiritwhotookupagreatdealofroom。
HavingfinallydiscoveredthattheseatadjoiningMissBart’swasatherdisposal,shepossessedherselfofitwithafartherdisplacementofhersurroundings,explainingmeanwhilethatshehadcomeacrossfromMountKiscoinhermotor-carthatmorning,andhadbeenkickingherheelsforanhouratGarrisons,withouteventhealleviationofacigarette,herbruteofahusbandhavingneglectedtoreplenishhercasebeforetheypartedthatmorning。
\"AndatthishourofthedayIdon’tsupposeyou’veasingleoneleft,haveyou,Lily?\"sheplaintivelyconcluded。
MissBartcaughtthestartledglanceofMr。PercyGryce,whoseownlipswereneverdefiledbytobacco。
\"Whatanabsurdquestion,Bertha!\"sheexclaimed,blushingatthethoughtofthestoreshehadlaidinatLawrenceSelden’s。
\"Why,don’tyousmoke?Sincewhenhaveyougivenitup?What——younever——Andyoudon’teither,Mr。Gryce?Ah,ofcourse——howstupidofme——Iunderstand。\"
AndMrs。DorsetleanedbackagainsthertravellingcushionswithasmilewhichmadeLilywishtherehadbeennovacantseatbesideherown。
BridgeatBellomontusuallylastedtillthesmallhours;andwhenLilywenttobedthatnightshehadplayedtoolongforherowngood。
Feelingnodesirefortheself-communionwhichawaitedherinherroom,shelingeredonthebroadstairway,lookingdownintothehallbelow,wherethelastcard-playersweregroupedaboutthetrayoftallglassesandsilver-collareddecanterswhichthebutlerhadjustplacedonalowtablenearthefire。
Thehallwasarcaded,withagallerysupportedoncolumnsofpaleyellowmarble。Tallclumpsoffloweringplantsweregroupedagainstabackgroundofdarkfoliageintheanglesofthewalls。
Onthecrimsoncarpetadeer-houndandtwoorthreespanielsdozedluxuriouslybeforethefire,andthelightfromthegreatcentrallanternoverheadshedabrightnessonthewomen’shairandstrucksparksfromtheirjewelsastheymoved。
ThereweremomentswhensuchscenesdelightedLily,whentheygratifiedhersenseofbeautyandhercravingfortheexternalfinishoflife;therewereotherswhentheygaveasharperedgetothemeagrenessofherownopportunities。Thiswasoneofthemomentswhenthesenseofcontrastwasuppermost,andsheturnedawayimpatientlyasMrs。GeorgeDorset,glitteringinserpentinespangles,drewPercyGryceinherwaketoaconfidentialnookbeneaththegallery。
ItwasnotthatMissBartwasafraidoflosinghernewly-acquiredholdoverMr。Gryce。Mrs。Dorsetmightstartleordazzlehim,butshehadneithertheskillnorthepatiencetoeffecthiscapture。
Shewastooself-engrossedtopenetratetherecessesofhisshyness,andbesides,whyshouldshecaretogiveherselfthetrouble?Atmostitmightamusehertomakesportofhissimplicityforanevening——afterthathewouldbemerelyaburdentoher,andknowingthis,shewasfartooexperiencedtoencouragehim。Butthemerethoughtofthatotherwoman,whocouldtakeamanupandtosshimasideasshewilled,withouthavingtoregardhimasapossiblefactorinherplans,filledLilyBartwithenvy。ShehadbeenboredalltheafternoonbyPercyGryce——themerethoughtseemedtowakenanechoofhisdroningvoice——butshecouldnotignorehimonthemorrow,shemustfollowuphersuccess,mustsubmittomoreboredom,mustbereadywithfreshcompliancesandadaptabilities,andallonthebarechancethathemightultimatelydecidetodoherthehonourofboringherforlife。
Itwasahatefulfate——buthowescapefromit?Whatchoicehadshe?Tobeherself,oraGertyFarish。Assheenteredherbedroom,withitssoftly-shadedlights,herlacedressing-gownlyingacrossthesilkenbedspread,herlittleembroideredslippersbeforethefire,avaseofcarnationsfillingtheairwithperfume,andthelastnovelsandmagazineslyinguncutonatablebesidethereading-lamp,shehadavisionofMissFarish’scrampedflat,withitscheapconveniencesandhideouswall-papers。No;shewasnotmadeformeanandshabbysurroundings,forthesqualidcompromisesofpoverty。Herwholebeingdilatedinanatmosphereofluxury;itwasthebackgroundsherequired,theonlyclimateshecouldbreathein。Buttheluxuryofotherswasnotwhatshewanted。Afewyearsagoithadsufficedher:shehadtakenherdailymeedofpleasurewithoutcaringwhoprovidedit。Nowshewasbeginningtochafeattheobligationsitimposed,tofeelherselfamerepensioneronthesplendourwhichhadonceseemedtobelongtoher。Therewereevenmomentswhenshewasconsciousofhavingtopayherway。
Foralongtimeshehadrefusedtoplaybridge。Sheknewshecouldnotaffordit,andshewasafraidofacquiringsoexpensiveataste。Shehadseenthedangerexemplifiedinmorethanoneofherassociates——inyoungNedSilverton,forinstance,thecharmingfairboynowseatedinabjectraptureattheelbowofMrs。Fisher,astrikingdivorceewitheyesandgownsasemphaticasthehead-linesofher\"case。\"LilycouldrememberwhenyoungSilvertonhadstumbledintotheircircle,withtheairofastrayedArcadianwhohaspublishedchamungsonnetsinhiscollegejournal。SincethenhehaddevelopedatasteforMrs。Fisherandbridge,andthelatteratleasthadinvolvedhiminexpensesfromwhichhehadbeenmorethanoncerescuedbyharassedmaidensisters,whotreasuredthesonnets,andwentwithoutsugarintheirteatokeeptheirdarlingafloat。Ned’scasewasfamiliartoLily:shehadseenhischarmingeyes——whichhadagooddealmorepoetryinthemthanthesonnets——changefromsurprisetoamusement,andfromamusementtoanxiety,ashepassedunderthespelloftheterriblegodofchance;andshewasafraidofdiscoveringthesamesymptomsinherowncase。
Forinthelastyearshehadfoundthatherhostessesexpectedhertotakeaplaceatthecard-table。Itwasoneofthetaxesshehadtopayfortheirprolongedhospitality,andforthedressesandtrinketswhichoccasionallyreplenishedherinsufficientwardrobe。Andsinceshehadplayedregularlythepassionhadgrownonher。Onceortwiceoflateshehadwonalargesum,andinsteadofkeepingitagainstfuturelosses,hadspentitindressorjewelry;andthedesiretoatoneforthisimprudence,combinedwiththeincreasingexhilarationofthegame,drovehertoriskhigherstakesateachfreshventure。Shetriedtoexcuseherselfonthepleathat,intheTrenorset,ifoneplayedatallonemusteitherplayhighorbesetdownaspriggishorstingy;butsheknewthatthegamblingpassionwasuponher,andthatinherpresentsurroundingstherewassmallhopeofresistingit。
Tonighttheluckhadbeenpersistentlybad,andthelittlegoldpursewhichhungamonghertrinketswasalmostemptywhenshereturnedtoherroom。Sheunlockedthewardrobe,andtakingoutherjewel-case,lookedunderthetrayfortherollofbillsfromwhichshehadreplenishedthepursebeforegoingdowntodinner。
Onlytwentydollarswereleft:thediscoverywassostartlingthatforamomentshefanciedshemusthavebeenrobbed。Thenshetookpaperandpencil,andseatingherselfatthewriting-table,triedtoreckonupwhatshehadspentduringtheday。Herheadwasthrobbingwithfatigue,andshehadtogooverthefiguresagainandagain;butatlastitbecamecleartoherthatshehadlostthreehundreddollarsatcards。Shetookouthercheque-booktoseeifherbalancewaslargerthansheremembered,butfoundshehaderredintheotherdirection。Thenshereturnedtohercalculations;butfigureasshewould,shecouldnotconjurebackthevanishedthreehundreddollars。Itwasthesumshehadsetasidetopacifyherdress-maker——unlesssheshoulddecidetouseitasasoptothejeweller。Atanyrate,shehadsomanyusesforitthatitsveryinsufficiencyhadcausedhertoplayhighinthehopeofdoublingit。Butofcourseshehadlost——shewhoneededeverypenny,whileBerthaDorset,whosehusbandshoweredmoneyonher,musthavepocketedatleastfivehundred,andJudyTrenor,whocouldhaveaffordedtoloseathousandanight,hadleftthetableclutchingsuchaheapofbillsthatshehadbeenunabletoshakehandswithherguestswhentheybadehergoodnight。
AworldinwhichsuchthingscouldbeseemedamiserableplacetoLilyBart;butthenshehadneverbeenabletounderstandthelawsofauniversewhichwassoreadytoleaveheroutofitscalculations。
Shebegantoundresswithoutringingforhermaid,whomshehadsenttobed。Shehadbeenlongenoughinbondagetootherpeople’spleasuretobeconsiderateofthosewhodependedonhers,andinherbittermoodsitsometimesstruckherthatsheandhermaidwereinthesameposition,exceptthatthelatterreceivedherwagesmoreregularly。
Asshesatbeforethemirrorbrushingherhair,herfacelookedhollowandpale,andshewasfrightenedbytwolittlelinesnearhermouth,faintflawsinthesmoothcurveofthecheek。
\"Oh,Imuststopworrying!\"sheexclaimed。\"Unlessit’stheelectriclight——\"shereflected,springingupfromherseatandlightingthecandlesonthedressing-table。
Sheturnedoutthewall-lights,andpeeredatherselfbetweenthecandle-flames。Thewhiteovalofherfaceswamoutwaveringlyfromabackgroundofshadows,theuncertainlightblurringitlikeahaze;butthetwolinesaboutthemouthremained。
Lilyroseandundressedinhaste。
\"ItisonlybecauseIamtiredandhavesuchodiousthingstothinkabout,\"shekeptrepeating;anditseemedanaddedinjusticethatpettycaresshouldleaveatraceonthebeautywhichwasheronlydefenceagainstthem。
Buttheodiousthingswerethere,andremainedwithher。ShereturnedwearilytothethoughtofPercyGryce,asawayfarerpicksupaheavyloadandtoilsonafterabriefrest。Shewasalmostsureshehad\"landed\"him:afewdays’workandshewouldwinherreward。Buttherewarditselfseemedupalatablejustthen:shecouldgetnozestfromthethoughtofvictory。Itwouldbearestfromworry,nomore——andhowlittlethatwouldhaveseemedtoherafewyearsearlier!Herambitionshadshrunkgraduallyinthedesiccatingairoffailure。Butwhyhadshefailed?Wasitherownfaultorthatofdestiny?
Sherememberedhowhermother,aftertheyhadlosttheirmoney,usedtosaytoherwithakindoffiercevindictiveness:\"Butyou’llgetitallback——you’llgetitallback,withyourface。\"……Theremembrancerousedawholetrainofassociation,andshelayinthedarknessreconstructingthepastoutofwhichherpresenthadgrown。
Ahouseinwhichnooneeverdinedathomeunlesstherewas\"company\";adoor-bellperpetuallyringing;ahall-tableshoweredwithsquareenvelopeswhichwereopenedinhaste,andoblongenvelopeswhichwereallowedtogatherdustinthedepthsofabronzejar;aseriesofFrenchandEnglishmaidsgivingwarningamidachaosofhurriedly-ransackedwardrobesanddress-closets;
anequallychangingdynastyofnursesandfootmen;quarrelsinthepantry,thekitchenandthedrawing-room;precipitatetripstoEurope,andreturnswithgorgedtrunksanddaysofinterminableunpacking;semi-annualdiscussionsastowherethesummershouldbespent,greyinterludesofeconomyandbrilliantreactionsofexpense——suchwasthesettingofLilyBart’sfirstmemories。
Rulingtheturbulentelementcalledhomewasthevigorousanddeterminedfigureofamotherstillyoungenoughtodanceherball-dressestorags,whilethehazyoutlineofaneutral-tintedfatherfilledanintermediatespacebetweenthebutlerandthemanwhocametowindtheclocks。Eventotheeyesofinfancy,Mrs。HudsonBarthadappearedyoung;butLilycouldnotrecallthetimewhenherfatherhadnotbeenbaldandslightlystooping,withstreaksofgreyinhishair,andatiredwalk。Itwasashocktohertolearnafterwardthathewasbuttwoyearsolderthanhermother。
Lilyseldomsawherfatherbydaylight。Alldayhewas\"downtown\";andinwinteritwaslongafternightfallwhensheheardhisfaggedsteponthestairsandhishandontheschool-roomdoor。Hewouldkissherinsilence,andaskoneortwoquestionsofthenurseorthegoverness;thenMrs。Bart’smaidwouldcometoremindhimthathewasdiningout,andhewouldhurryawaywithanodtoLily。Insummer,whenhejoinedthemforaSundayatNewportorSouthampton,hewasevenmoreeffacedandsilentthaninwinter。Itseemedtotirehimtorest,andhewouldsitforhoursstaringatthesea-linefromaquietcorneroftheverandah,whiletheclatterofhiswife’sexistencewentonunheededafewfeetoff。Generally,however,Mrs。BartandLilywenttoEuropeforthesummer,andbeforethesteamerwashalfwayoverMr。Barthaddippedbelowthehorizon。SometimeshisdaughterheardhimdenouncedforhavingneglectedtoforwardMrs。Bart’sremittances;butforthemostparthewasnevermentionedorthoughtoftillhispatientstoopingfigurepresenteditselfontheNewYorkdockasabufferbetweenthemagnitudeofhiswife’sluggageandtherestrictionsoftheAmericancustom-house。
InthisdesultoryyetagitatedfashionlifewentonthroughLily’steens:azig-zagbrokencoursedownwhichthefamilycraftglidedonarapidcurrentofamusement,tuggedatbytheunderflowofaperpetualneed——theneedofmoremoney。Lilycouldnotrecallthetimewhentherehadbeenmoneyenough,andinsomevaguewayherfatherseemedalwaystoblameforthedeficiency。