第10章

类别:其他 作者:D。 H。 Lawrence字数:10983更新时间:18/12/18 08:44:44
Geraldwasherescapefromtheheavysloughofthepale,underworld,automaticcolliers。Hestartedoutofthemud。Hewasmaster。Shesawhisback,themovementofhiswhiteloins。Butnotthat——itwasthewhitenessheseemedtoencloseashebentforwards,rowing。Heseemedtostooptosomething。Hisglistening,whitishhairseemedliketheelectricityofthesky。 `There\'sGudrun,\'cameHermione\'svoicefloatingdistinctoverthewater。 `Wewillgoandspeaktoher。Doyoumind?\' Geraldlookedroundandsawthegirlstandingbythewater\'sedge,lookingathim。Hepulledtheboattowardsher,magnetically,withoutthinkingofher。Inhisworld,hisconsciousworld,shewasstillnobody。HeknewthatHermionehadacuriouspleasureintreadingdownallthesocialdifferences,atleastapparently,andheleftittoher。 `Howdoyoudo,Gudrun?\'sangHermione,usingtheChristiannameinthefashionablemanner。`Whatareyoudoing?\' `Howdoyoudo,Hermione?Iwassketching。\' `Wereyou?\'Theboatdriftednearer,tillthekeelgroundonthebank。 `Maywesee?Ishouldliketosomuch。\' ItwasnouseresistingHermione\'sdeliberateintention。 `Well——\'saidGudrunreluctantly,forshealwayshatedtohaveherunfinishedworkexposed——`there\'snothingintheleastinteresting。\' `Isn\'tthere?Butletmesee,willyou?\' Gudrunreachedoutthesketch—book,Geraldstretchedfromtheboattotakeit。Andashedidso,herememberedGudrun\'slastwordstohim,andherfacelifteduptohimashesatontheswervinghorse。Anintensificationofpridewentoverhisnerves,becausehefelt,insomewayshewascompelledbyhim。Theexchangeoffeelingbetweenthemwasstrongandapartfromtheirconsciousness。 Andasifinaspell,Gudrunwasawareofhisbody,stretchingandsurginglikethemarsh—fire,stretchingtowardsher,hishandcomingstraightforwardlikeastem。Hervoluptuous,acuteapprehensionofhimmadethebloodfaintinherveins,hermindwentdimandunconscious。Andherockedonthewaterperfectly,liketherockingofphosphorescence。Helookedroundattheboat。Itwasdriftingoffalittle。Heliftedtheoartobringitback。 Andtheexquisitepleasureofslowlyarrestingtheboat,intheheavy—softwater,wascompleteasaswoon。 `That\'swhatyouhavedone,\'saidHermione,lookingsearchinglyattheplantsontheshore,andcomparingwithGudrun\'sdrawing。GudrunlookedroundinthedirectionofHermione\'slong,pointingfinger。`Thatisit,isn\'tit?\'repeatedHermione,needingconfirmation。 `Yes,\'saidGudrunautomatically,takingnorealheed。 `Letmelook,\'saidGerald,reachingforwardforthebook。ButHermioneignoredhim,hemustnotpresume,beforeshehadfinished。Buthe,hiswillasunthwartedandasunflinchingashers,stretchedforwardtillhetouchedthebook。Alittleshock,astormofrevulsionagainsthim,shookHermioneunconsciously。Shereleasedthebookwhenhehadnotproperlygotit,andittumbledagainstthesideoftheboatandbouncedintothewater。 `There!\'sangHermione,withastrangeringofmalevolentvictory。`I\'msosorry,soawfullysorry。Can\'tyougetit,Gerald?\' ThislastwassaidinanoteofanxioussneeringthatmadeGerald\'sveinstinglewithfinehateforher。Heleanedfaroutoftheboat,reachingdownintothewater。Hecouldfeelhispositionwasridiculous,hisloinsexposedbehindhim。 `Itisofnoimportance,\'camethestrong,clangingvoiceofGudrun。 Sheseemedtotouchhim。Buthereachedfurther,theboatswayedviolently。 Hermione,however,remainedunperturbed。Hegraspedthebook,underthewater,andbroughtitup,dripping。 `I\'msodreadfullysorry——dreadfullysorry,\'repeatedHermione。`I\'mafraiditwasallmyfault。\' `It\'sofnoimportance——really,Iassureyou——itdoesn\'tmatterintheleast,\'saidGudrunloudly,withemphasis,herfaceflushedscarlet。 Andsheheldoutherhandimpatientlyforthewetbook,tohavedonewiththescene。Geraldgaveittoher。Hewasnotquitehimself。 `I\'msodreadfullysorry,\'repeatedHermione,tillbothGeraldandGudrunwereexasperated。`Istherenothingthatcanbedone?\' `Inwhatway?\'askedGudrun,withcoolirony。 `Can\'twesavethedrawings?\' Therewasamoment\'spause,whereinGudrunmadeevidentallherrefutationofHermione\'spersistence。 `Iassureyou,\'saidGudrun,withcuttingdistinctness,`thedrawingsarequiteasgoodasevertheywere,formypurpose。Iwantthemonlyforreference。\' `Butcan\'tIgiveyouanewbook?Iwishyou\'dletmedothat。Ifeelsotrulysorry。Ifeelitwasallmyfault。\' `AsfarasIsaw,\'saidGudrun,`itwasn\'tyourfaultatall。Iftherewasanyfault,itwasMrCrich\'s。Butthewholethingisentirelytrivial,anditreallyisridiculoustotakeanynoticeofit。\' GeraldwatchedGudrunclosely,whilstsherepulsedHermione。Therewasabodyofcoldpowerinher。Hewatchedherwithaninsightthatamountedtoclairvoyance。Hesawheradangerous,hostilespirit,thatcouldstandundiminishedandunabated。Itwassofinished,andofsuchperfectgesture,moreover。 `I\'mawfullygladifitdoesn\'tmatter,\'hesaid;`ifthere\'snorealharmdone。\' Shelookedbackathim,withherfineblueeyes,andsignalledfullintohisspirit,asshesaid,hervoiceringingwithintimacyalmostcaressivenowitwasaddressedtohim: `Ofcourse,itdoesn\'tmatterintheleast。\' Thebondwasestablishedbetweenthem,inthatlook,inhertone。Inhertone,shemadetheunderstandingclear——theywereofthesamekind,heandshe,asortofdiabolicfreemasonrysubsistedbetweenthem。Henceforward,sheknew,shehadherpoweroverhim。Wherevertheymet,theywouldbesecretlyassociated。Andhewouldbehelplessintheassociationwithher。 Hersoulexulted。 `Good—bye!I\'msogladyouforgiveme。Gooood—bye!\' Hermionesangherfarewell,andwavedherhand。Geraldautomaticallytooktheoarandpushedoff。Buthewaslookingallthetime,withaglimmering,subtly—smilingadmirationinhiseyes,atGudrun,whostoodontheshoalshakingthewetbookinherhand。Sheturnedawayandignoredtherecedingboat。ButGeraldlookedbackasherowed,beholdingher,forgettingwhathewasdoing。 `Aren\'twegoingtoomuchtotheleft?\'sangHermione,asshesatignoredunderhercolouredparasol。 Geraldlookedroundwithoutreplying,theoarsbalancedandglancinginthesun。 `Ithinkit\'sallright,\'hesaidgood—humouredly,beginningtorowagainwithoutthinkingofwhathewasdoing。AndHermionedislikedhimextremelyforhisgood—humouredobliviousness,shewasnullified,shecouldnotregainascendancy。 WomenInLove:Chapter11CHAPTERXIAnIslandMEANWHILEUrsulahadwanderedonfromWilleyWateralongthecourseofthebrightlittlestream。Theafternoonwasfulloflarks\'singing。Onthebrighthill—sideswasasubduedsmoulderofgorse。 Afewforget—me—notsfloweredbythewater。Therewasarousednessandaglancingeverywhere。 Shestrayedabsorbedlyon,overthebrooks。Shewantedtogotothemill—pondabove。Thebigmill—housewasdeserted,saveforalabourerandhiswifewholivedinthekitchen。Soshepassedthroughtheemptyfarm—yardandthroughthewildernessofagarden,andmountedthebankbythesluice。 Whenshegottothetop,toseetheold,velvetysurfaceofthepondbeforeher,shenoticedamanonthebank,tinkeringwithapunt。ItwasBirkinsawingandhammeringaway。 Shestoodattheheadofthesluice,lookingathim。Hewasunawareofanybody\'spresence。Helookedverybusy,likeawildanimal,activeandintent。Shefeltsheoughttogoaway,hewouldnotwanther。Heseemedtobesomuchoccupied。Butshedidnotwanttogoaway。Thereforeshemovedalongthebanktillhewouldlookup。 Whichhesoondid。Themomenthesawher,hedroppedhistoolsandcameforward,saying: `Howdoyoudo?I\'mmakingthepuntwater—tight。Tellmeifyouthinkitisright。\' Shewentalongwithhim。 `Youareyourfather\'sdaughter,soyoucantellmeifitwilldo,\' hesaid。 Shebenttolookatthepatchedpunt。 `IamsureIammyfather\'sdaughter,\'shesaid,fearfulofhavingtojudge。`ButIdon\'tknowanythingaboutcarpentry。Itlooksright,don\'tyouthink?\' `Yes,Ithink。Ihopeitwon\'tletmetothebottom,that\'sall。Thoughevenso,itisn\'tagreatmatter,Ishouldcomeupagain。Helpmetogetitintothewater,willyou?\' Withcombinedeffortstheyturnedovertheheavypuntandsetitafloat。 `Now,\'hesaid,`I\'lltryitandyoucanwatchwhathappens。Thenifitcarries,I\'lltakeyouovertotheisland。\' `Do,\'shecried,watchinganxiously。 Thepondwaslarge,andhadthatperfectstillnessandthedarklustreofverydeepwater。Thereweretwosmallislandsovergrownwithbushesandafewtrees,towardsthemiddle。Birkinpushedhimselfoff,andveeredclumsilyinthepond。Luckilythepuntdriftedsothathecouldcatchholdofawillowbough,andpullittotheisland。 `Ratherovergrown,\'hesaid,lookingintotheinterior,`butverynice。 I\'llcomeandfetchyou。Theboatleaksalittle。\' Inamomenthewaswithheragain,andshesteppedintothewetpunt。 `It\'llfloatusallright,\'hesaid,andmanoeuvredagaintotheisland。 Theylandedunderawillowtree。Sheshrankfromthelittlejungleofrankplantsbeforeher,evil—smellingfigwortandhemlock。Butheexploredintoit。 `Ishallmowthisdown,\'hesaid,`andthenitwillberomantic——likePauletVirginie。\' `Yes,onecouldhavelovelyWatteaupicnicshere,\'criedUrsulawithenthusiasm。 Hisfacedarkened。 `Idon\'twantWatteaupicnicshere,\'hesaid。 `OnlyyourVirginie,\'shelaughed。 `Virginieenough,\'hesmiledwryly。`No,Idon\'twanthereither。\' Ursulalookedathimclosely。ShehadnotseenhimsinceBreadalby。 Hewasverythinandhollow,withaghastlylookinhisface。 `Youhavebeenill;haven\'tyou?\'sheasked,ratherrepulsed。 `Yes,\'herepliedcoldly。 Theyhadsatdownunderthewillowtree,andwerelookingatthepond,fromtheirretreatontheisland。 `Hasitmadeyoufrightened?\'sheasked。 `Whatof?\'heasked,turninghiseyestolookather。Somethinginhim,inhumanandunmitigated,disturbedher,andshookheroutofherordinaryself。 `Itisfrighteningtobeveryill,isn\'tit?\'shesaid。 `Itisn\'tpleasant,\'hesaid。`Whetheroneisreallyafraidofdeath,ornot,Ihaveneverdecided。Inonemood,notabit,inanother,verymuch。\' `Butdoesn\'titmakeyoufeelashamed?Ithinkitmakesonesoashamed,tobeill——illnessissoterriblyhumiliating,don\'tyouthink?\' Heconsideredforsomeminutes。 `May—be,\'hesaid。`Thoughoneknowsallthetimeone\'slifeisn\'treallyright,atthesource。That\'sthehumiliation。Idon\'tseethattheillnesscountssomuch,afterthat。Oneisillbecauseonedoesn\'tliveproperly——can\'t。It\'sthefailuretolivethatmakesoneill,andhumiliatesone。\' `Butdoyoufailtolive?\'sheasked,almostjeering。 `Whyyes——Idon\'tmakemuchofasuccessofmydays。Oneseemsalwaystobebumpingone\'snoseagainsttheblankwallahead。\' Ursulalaughed。Shewasfrightened,andwhenshewasfrightenedshealwayslaughedandpretendedtobejaunty。 `Yourpoornose!\'shesaid,lookingatthatfeatureofhisface。 `Nowonderit\'sugly,\'hereplied。 Shewassilentforsomeminutes,strugglingwithherownself—deception。 Itwasaninstinctinher,todeceiveherself。 `ButI\'mhappy——Ithinklifeisawfullyjolly,\'shesaid。 `Good,\'heanswered,withacertaincoldindifference。 Shereachedforabitofpaperwhichhadwrappedasmallpieceofchocolateshehadfoundinherpocket,andbeganmakingaboat。Hewatchedherwithoutheedingher。Therewassomethingstrangelypatheticandtenderinhermoving,unconsciousfinger—tips,thatwereagitatedandhurt,really。 `Idoenjoythings——don\'tyou?\'sheasked。 `Ohyes!ButitinfuriatesmethatIcan\'tgetright,atthereallygrowingpartofme。Ifeelalltangledandmessedup,andIcan\'tgetstraightanyhow。Idon\'tknowwhatreallytodo。Onemustdosomethingsomewhere。\' `Whyshouldyoualwaysbedoing?\'sheretorted。`Itissoplebeian。 Ithinkitismuchbettertobereallypatrician,andtodonothingbutjustbeoneself,likeawalkingflower。\' `Iquiteagree,\'hesaid,`ifonehasburstintoblossom。ButIcan\'tgetmyflowertoblossomanyhow。Eitheritisblightedinthebud,orhasgotthesmother—fly,oritisn\'tnourished。Curseit,itisn\'tevenabud。 Itisacontravenedknot。\' Againshelaughed。Hewassoveryfretfulandexasperated。Butshewasanxiousandpuzzled。Howwasonetogetout,anyhow。Theremustbeawayoutsomewhere。 Therewasasilence,whereinshewantedtocry。Shereachedforanotherbitofchocolatepaper,andbegantofoldanotherboat。 `Andwhyisit,\'sheaskedatlength,`thatthereisnoflowering,nodignityofhumanlifenow?\' `Thewholeideaisdead。Humanityitselfisdry—rotten,really。Therearemyriadsofhumanbeingshangingonthebush——andtheylookveryniceandrosy,yourhealthyyoungmenandwomen。ButtheyareapplesofSodom,asamatteroffact,DeadSeaFruit,gall—apples。Itisn\'ttruethattheyhaveanysignificance——theirinsidesarefullofbitter,corruptash。\' `Buttherearegoodpeople,\'protestedUrsula。 `Goodenoughforthelifeoftoday。Butmankindisadeadtree,coveredwithfinebrilliantgallsofpeople。\' Ursulacouldnothelpstiffeningherselfagainstthis,itwastoopicturesqueandfinal。Butneithercouldshehelpmakinghimgoon。 `Andifitisso,whyisit?\'sheasked,hostile。Theywererousingeachothertoafinepassionofopposition。 `Why,whyarepeopleallballsofbitterdust?Becausetheywon\'tfalloffthetreewhenthey\'reripe。Theyhangontotheiroldpositionswhenthepositionisover—past,tilltheybecomeinfestedwithlittlewormsanddry—rot。\' Therewasalongpause。Hisvoicehadbecomehotandverysarcastic。 Ursulawastroubledandbewildered,theywerebothobliviousofeverythingbuttheirownimmersion。 `Butevenifeverybodyiswrong——whereareyouright?\'shecried,`whereareyouanybetter?\' `I?——I\'mnotright,\'hecriedback。`AtleastmyonlyrightnessliesinthefactthatIknowit。IdetestwhatIam,outwardly。Iloathemyselfasahumanbeing。Humanityisahugeaggregatelie,andahugelieislessthanasmalltruth。Humanityisless,farlessthantheindividual,becausetheindividualmaysometimesbecapableoftruth,andhumanityisatreeoflies。Andtheysaythatloveisthegreatestthing;theypersistinsayingthis,thefoulliars,andjustlookatwhattheydo!Lookatallthemillionsofpeoplewhorepeateveryminutethatloveisthegreatest,andcharityisthegreatest——andseewhattheyaredoingallthetime。Bytheirworksyeshallknowthem,fordirtyliarsandcowards,whodaren\'tstandbytheirownactions,muchlessbytheirownwords。\' `But,\'saidUrsulasadly,`thatdoesn\'talterthefactthatloveisthegreatest,doesit?Whattheydodoesn\'talterthetruthofwhattheysay,doesit?\' `Completely,becauseifwhattheysayweretrue,thentheycouldn\'thelpfulfillingit。Buttheymaintainalie,andsotheyrunamokatlast。 It\'salietosaythatloveisthegreatest。Youmightaswellsaythathateisthegreatest,sincetheoppositeofeverythingbalances。Whatpeoplewantishate——hateandnothingbuthate。Andinthenameofrighteousnessandlove,theygetit。Theydistilthemselveswithnitroglycerine,allthelotofthem,outofverylove。It\'stheliethatkills。Ifwewanthate,letushaveit——death,murder,torture,violentdestruction—— letushaveit:butnotinthenameoflove。ButIabhorhumanity,Iwishitwassweptaway。Itcouldgo,andtherewouldbenoabsoluteloss,ifeveryhumanbeingperishedtomorrow。Therealitywouldbeuntouched。 Nay,itwouldbebetter。Therealtreeoflifewouldthenberidofthemostghastly,heavycropofDeadSeaFruit,theintolerableburdenofmyriadsimulacraofpeople,aninfiniteweightofmortallies。\' `Soyou\'dlikeeverybodyintheworlddestroyed?\'saidUrsula。 `Ishouldindeed。\' `Andtheworldemptyofpeople?\' `Yestruly。Youyourself,don\'tyoufinditabeautifulcleanthought,aworldemptyofpeople,justuninterruptedgrass,andaharesittingup?\' ThepleasantsincerityofhisvoicemadeUrsulapausetoconsiderherownproposition。Andreallyitwasattractive:aclean,lovely,humanlessworld。Itwasthereallydesirable。Herhearthesitated,andexulted。Butstill,shewasdissatisfiedwithhim。 `But,\'sheobjected,`you\'dbedeadyourself,sowhatgoodwoulditdoyou?\' `Iwoulddielikeashot,toknowthattheearthwouldreallybecleanedofallthepeople。Itisthemostbeautifulandfreeingthought。Thentherewouldneverbeanotherfoulhumanitycreated,forauniversaldefilement。\' `No,\'saidUrsula,`therewouldbenothing。\' `What!Nothing?Justbecausehumanitywaswipedout?Youflatteryourself。 There\'dbeeverything。\' `Buthow,iftherewerenopeople?\' `Doyouthinkthatcreationdependsonman!Itmerelydoesn\'t。 Therearethetreesandthegrassandbirds。Imuchprefertothinkofthelarkrisingupinthemorninguponahuman—lessworld。Manisamistake,hemustgo。Thereisthegrass,andharesandadders,andtheunseenhosts,actualangelsthatgoaboutfreelywhenadirtyhumanitydoesn\'tinterruptthem——andgoodpure—tissueddemons:verynice。\' ItpleasedUrsula,whathesaid,pleasedherverymuch,asaphantasy。 Ofcourseitwasonlyapleasantfancy。Sheherselfknewtoowelltheactualityofhumanity,itshideousactuality。Sheknewitcouldnotdisappearsocleanlyandconveniently。Ithadalongwaytogoyet,alongandhideousway。Hersubtle,feminine,demoniacalsoulknewitwell。 `Ifonlymanwassweptoffthefaceoftheearth,creationwouldgoonsomarvellously,withanewstart,non—human。Manisoneofthemistakesofcreation——liketheichthyosauri。Ifonlyheweregoneagain,thinkwhatlovelythingswouldcomeoutoftheliberateddays;——thingsstraightoutofthefire。\' `Butmanwillneverbegone,\'shesaid,withinsidious,diabolicalknowledgeofthehorrorsofpersistence。`Theworldwillgowithhim。\' `Ahno,\'heanswered,`notso。Ibelieveintheproudangelsandthedemonsthatareourfore—runners。Theywilldestroyus,becausewearenotproudenough。Theichthyosauriwerenotproud:theycrawledandflounderedaswedo。Andbesides,lookatelder—flowersandbluebells——theyareasignthatpurecreationtakesplace——eventhebutterfly。Buthumanitynevergetsbeyondthecaterpillarstage——itrotsinthechrysalis,itneverwillhavewings。Itisanti—creation,likemonkeysandbaboons。\' Ursulawatchedhimashetalked。Thereseemedacertainimpatientfuryinhim,allthewhile,andatthesametimeagreatamusementineverything,andafinaltolerance。Anditwasthistoleranceshemistrusted,notthefury。Shesawthat,allthewhile,inspiteofhimself,hewouldhavetobetryingtosavetheworld。Andthisknowledge,whilstitcomfortedherheartsomewherewithalittleself—satisfaction,stability,yetfilledherwithacertainsharpcontemptandhateofhim。Shewantedhimtoherself,shehatedtheSalvatorMunditouch。Itwassomethingdiffuseandgeneralisedabouthim,whichshecouldnotstand。Hewouldbehaveinthesameway,saythesamethings,givehimselfascompletelytoanybodywhocamealong,anybodyandeverybodywholikedtoappealtohim。Itwasdespicable,averyinsidiousformofprostitution。 `But,\'shesaid,`youbelieveinindividuallove,evenifyoudon\'tbelieveinlovinghumanity——?\' `Idon\'tbelieveinloveatall——thatis,anymorethanIbelieveinhate,oringrief。Loveisoneoftheemotionslikealltheothers—— andsoitisallrightwhilstyoufeelitButIcan\'tseehowitbecomesanabsolute。Itisjustpartofhumanrelationships,nomore。Anditisonlypartofanyhumanrelationship。Andwhyoneshouldberequiredalwaystofeelit,anymorethanonealwaysfeelssorrowordistantjoy,Icannotconceive。Loveisn\'tadesideratum——itisanemotionyoufeeloryoudon\'tfeel,accordingtocircumstance。\' `Thenwhydoyoucareaboutpeopleatall?\'sheasked,`ifyoudon\'tbelieveinlove?Whydoyoubotherabouthumanity?\' `WhydoI?BecauseIcan\'tgetawayfromit。\' `Becauseyouloveit,\'shepersisted。 Itirritatedhim。 `IfIdoloveit,\'hesaid,`itismydisease。\' `Butitisadiseaseyoudon\'twanttobecuredof,\'shesaid,withsomecoldsneering。 Hewassilentnow,feelingshewantedtoinsulthim。 `Andifyoudon\'tbelieveinlove,whatdoyoubelievein?\'sheaskedmocking。`Simplyintheendoftheworld,andgrass?\' Hewasbeginningtofeelafool。 `Ibelieveintheunseenhosts,\'hesaid。 `Andnothingelse?Youbelieveinnothingvisible,exceptgrassandbirds?Yourworldisapoorshow。\' `Perhapsitis,\'hesaid,coolandsuperiornowhewasoffended,assumingacertaininsufferablealoofsuperiority,andwithdrawingintohisdistance。 Ursuladislikedhim。Butalsoshefeltshehadlostsomething。Shelookedathimashesatcrouchedonthebank。TherewasacertainpriggishSunday—schoolstiffnessoverhim,priggishanddetestable。Andyet,atthesametime,themouldingofhimwassoquickandattractive,itgavesuchagreatsenseoffreedom:themouldingofhisbrows,hischin,hiswholephysique,somethingsoalive,somewhere,inspiteofthelookofsickness。 Anditwasthisdualityinfeelingwhichhecreatedinher,thatmadeafinehateofhimquickeninherbowels。Therewashiswonderful,desirablelife—rapidity,therarequalityofanutterlydesirableman:andtherewasatthesametimethisridiculous,meaneffacementintoaSalvatorMundiandaSunday—schoolteacher,aprigofthestiffesttype。 Helookedupather。Hesawherfacestrangelyenkindled,asifsuffusedfromwithinbyapowerfulsweetfire。Hissoulwasarrestedinwonder。 Shewasenkindledinherownlivingfire。Arrestedinwonderandinpure,perfectattraction,hemovedtowardsher。Shesatlikeastrangequeen,almostsupernaturalinherglowingsmilingrichness。 `Thepointaboutlove,\'hesaid,hisconsciousnessquicklyadjustingitself,`isthatwehatethewordbecausewehavevulgarisedit。Itoughttobeprescribed,tabooedfromutterance,formanyyears,tillwegetanew,betteridea。\' Therewasabeamofunderstandingbetweenthem。 `Butitalwaysmeansthesamething,\'shesaid。 `AhGod,no,letitnotmeanthatanymore,\'hecried。`Lettheoldmeaningsgo。\' `Butstillitislove,\'shepersisted。Astrange,wickedyellowlightshoneathiminhereyes。 Hehesitated,baffled,withdrawing。 `No,\'hesaid,`itisn\'t。Spokenlikethat,neverintheworld。You\'venobusinesstouttertheword。\' `Imustleaveittoyou,totakeitoutoftheArkoftheCovenantattherightmoment,\'shemocked。 Againtheylookedateachother。Shesuddenlysprangup,turnedherbacktohim,andwalkedaway。Hetooroseslowlyandwenttothewater\'sedge,where,crouching,hebegantoamusehimselfunconsciously。Pickingadaisyhedroppeditonthepond,sothatthestemwasakeel,theflowerfloatedlikealittlewaterlily,staringwithitsopenfaceuptothesky。Itturnedslowlyround,inaslow,slowDervishdance,asitveeredaway。 Hewatchedit,thendroppedanotherdaisyintothewater,andafterthatanother,andsatwatchingthemwithbright,absolvedeyes,crouchingnearonthebank。Ursulaturnedtolook。Astrangefeelingpossessedher,asifsomethingweretakingplace。Butitwasallintangible。Andsomesortofcontrolwasbeingputonher。Shecouldnotknow。Shecouldonlywatchthebrilliantlittlediscsofthedaisiesveeringslowlyintravelonthedark,lustrouswater。Thelittleflotillawasdriftingintothelight,acompanyofwhitespecksinthedistance。 `Doletusgototheshore,tofollowthem,\'shesaid,afraidofbeinganylongerimprisonedontheisland。Andtheypushedoffinthepunt。 Shewasgladtobeonthefreelandagain。Shewentalongthebanktowardsthesluice。Thedaisieswerescatteredbroadcastonthepond,tinyradiantthings,likeanexaltation,pointsofexaltationhereandthere。Whydidtheymovehersostronglyandmystically? `Look,\'hesaid,`yourboatofpurplepaperisescortingthem,andtheyareaconvoyofrafts。\' Someofthedaisiescameslowlytowardsher,hesitating,makingashybrightlittlecotilliononthedarkclearwater。Theirgaybrightcandourmovedhersomuchastheycamenear,thatshewasalmostintears。 `Whyaretheysolovely,\'shecried。`WhydoIthinkthemsolovely?\' `Theyareniceflowers,\'hesaid,heremotionaltonesputtingaconstraintonhim。 `Youknowthatadaisyisacompanyofflorets,aconcourse,becomeindividual。Don\'tthebotanistsputithighestinthelineofdevelopment? Ibelievetheydo。\' `Thecompositae,yes,Ithinkso,\'saidUrsula,whowasneververysureofanything。Thingssheknewperfectlywell,atonemoment,seemedtobecomedoubtfulthenext。 `Explainitso,then,\'hesaid。`Thedaisyisaperfectlittledemocracy,soit\'sthehighestofflowers,henceitscharm。\' `No,\'shecried,`no——never。Itisn\'tdemocratic。\' `No,\'headmitted。`It\'sthegoldenmoboftheproletariat,surroundedbyashowywhitefenceoftheidlerich。\' `Howhateful——yourhatefulsocialorders!\'shecried。 `Quite!It\'sadaisy——we\'llleaveitalone。\' `Do。Letitbeadarkhorseforonce,\'shesaid:`ifanythingcanbeadarkhorsetoyou,\'sheaddedsatirically。 Theystoodaside,forgetful。Asifalittlestunned,theybothweremotionless,barelyconscious。Thelittleconflictintowhichtheyhadfallenhadtorntheirconsciousnessandleftthemliketwoimpersonalforces,thereincontact。 Hebecameawareofthelapse。Hewantedtosaysomething,togetontoanewmoreordinaryfooting。 `Youknow,\'hesaid,`thatIamhavingroomshereatthemill?Don\'tyouthinkwecanhavesomegoodtimes?\' `Ohareyou?\'shesaid,ignoringallhisimplicationofadmittedintimacy。