第4章

类别:其他 作者:Sherwood Anderson字数:15922更新时间:18/12/14 16:11:44
OneoftheBentleysisterscookedthelittleanimalandheateitwithgreatgusto。Theskinhetackedonaboardandsuspendedtheboardbyastringfromhisbedroomwindow。 Thatgavehismindanewturn。Afterthatheneverwentintothewoodswithoutcarryingtheslinginhispocketandhespenthoursshootingatimaginaryanimalsconcealedamongthebrownleavesinthetrees。Thoughtsofhiscomingmanhoodpassedandhewascontenttobeaboywithaboy\'simpulses。 OneSaturdaymorningwhenhewasabouttosetoffforthewoodswiththeslinginhispocketandabagfornutsonhisshoulder,hisgrandfatherstoppedhim。IntheeyesoftheoldmanwasthestrainedseriouslookthatalwaysalittlefrightenedDavid。AtsuchtimesJesseBentley\'seyesdidnotlookstraightaheadbutwaveredandseemedtobelookingatnothing。Somethinglikeaninvisiblecurtainap- pearedtohavecomebetweenthemanandalltherestoftheworld。\"Iwantyoutocomewithme,\" hesaidbriefly,andhiseyeslookedovertheboy\'sheadintothesky。\"Wehavesomethingimportanttodotoday。Youmaybringthebagfornutsifyouwish。Itdoesnotmatterandanywaywewillbegoingintothewoods。\" JesseandDavidsetoutfromtheBentleyfarm- houseintheoldphaetonthatwasdrawnbythewhitehorse。Whentheyhadgonealonginsilenceforalongwaytheystoppedattheedgeofafieldwhereaflockofsheepweregrazing。Amongthesheepwasalambthathadbeenbornoutofseason,andthisDavidandhisgrandfathercaughtandtiedsotightlythatitlookedlikealittlewhiteball。WhentheydroveonagainJesseletDavidholdthelambinhisarms。\"IsawityesterdayanditputmeinmindofwhatIhavelongwantedtodo,\"hesaid,andagainhelookedawayovertheheadoftheboywiththewavering,uncertainstareinhiseyes。 Afterthefeelingofexaltationthathadcometothefarmerasaresultofhissuccessfulyear,anothermoodhadtakenpossessionofhim。Foralongtimehehadbeengoingaboutfeelingveryhumbleandprayerful。AgainhewalkedaloneatnightthinkingofGodandashewalkedheagainconnectedhisownfigurewiththefiguresofolddays。Underthestarshekneltonthewetgrassandraiseduphisvoiceinprayer。NowhehaddecidedthatlikethemenwhosestoriesfilledthepagesoftheBible,hewouldmakeasacrificetoGod。\"IhavebeengiventheseabundantcropsandGodhasalsosentmeaboywhoiscalledDavid,\"hewhisperedtohimself。 \"PerhapsIshouldhavedonethisthinglongago。\" HewassorrytheideahadnotcomeintohismindinthedaysbeforehisdaughterLouisehadbeenbornandthoughtthatsurelynowwhenhehaderectedapileofburningsticksinsomelonelyplaceinthewoodsandhadofferedthebodyofalambasaburntoffering,Godwouldappeartohimandgivehimamessage。 Moreandmoreashethoughtofthematter,hethoughtalsoofDavidandhispassionateself-lovewaspartiallyforgotten。\"Itistimefortheboytobeginthinkingofgoingoutintotheworldandthemessagewillbeoneconcerninghim,\"hedecided。 \"Godwillmakeapathwayforhim。HewilltellmewhatplaceDavidistotakeinlifeandwhenheshallsetoutonhisjourney。Itisrightthattheboyshouldbethere。IfIamfortunateandanangelofGodshouldappear,DavidwillseethebeautyandgloryofGodmademanifesttoman。ItwillmakeatruemanofGodofhimalso。\" InsilenceJesseandDaviddrovealongtheroaduntiltheycametothatplacewhereJessehadoncebeforeappealedtoGodandhadfrightenedhisgrandson。Themorninghadbeenbrightandcheer- ful,butacoldwindnowbegantoblowandcloudshidthesun。WhenDavidsawtheplacetowhichtheyhadcomehebegantotremblewithfright,andwhentheystoppedbythebridgewherethecreekcamedownfromamongthetrees,hewantedtospringoutofthephaetonandrunaway。 AdozenplansforescaperanthroughDavid\'shead,butwhenJessestoppedthehorseandclimbedoverthefenceintothewood,hefollowed。\"Itisfoolishtobeafraid。Nothingwillhappen,\"hetoldhimselfashewentalongwiththelambinhisarms。 Therewassomethinginthehelplessnessofthelittleanimalheldsotightlyinhisarmsthatgavehimcourage。Hecouldfeeltherapidbeatingofthebeast\'sheartandthatmadehisownheartbeatlessrapidly。Ashewalkedswiftlyalongbehindhisgrandfather,heuntiedthestringwithwhichthefourlegsofthelambwerefastenedtogether。\"Ifanythinghappenswewillrunawaytogether,\"hethought。 Inthewoods,aftertheyhadgonealongwayfromtheroad,Jessestoppedinanopeningamongthetreeswhereaclearing,overgrownwithsmallbushes,ranupfromthecreek。Hewasstillsilentbutbeganatoncetoerectaheapofdrystickswhichhepresentlysetafire。Theboysatonthegroundwiththelambinhisarms。Hisimaginationbegantoinvesteverymovementoftheoldmanwithsignifi- canceandhebecameeverymomentmoreafraid。\"I mustputthebloodofthelambontheheadoftheboy,\"Jessemutteredwhenthestickshadbeguntoblazegreedily,andtakingalongknifefromhispocketheturnedandwalkedrapidlyacrosstheclearingtowardDavid。 Terrorseizeduponthesouloftheboy。Hewassickwithit。Foramomenthesatperfectlystillandthenhisbodystiffenedandhesprangtohisfeet。 Hisfacebecameaswhiteasthefleeceofthelambthat,nowfindingitselfsuddenlyreleased,randownthehill。Davidranalso。Fearmadehisfeetfly。Overthelowbushesandlogsheleapedfrantically。Asheranheputhishandintohispocketandtookoutthebranchedstickfromwhichtheslingforshootingsquirrelswassuspended。Whenhecametothecreekthatwasshallowandsplasheddownoverthestones,hedashedintothewaterandturnedtolookback,andwhenhesawhisgrandfatherstillrunningtowardhimwiththelongknifeheldtightlyinhishandhedidnothesitate,butreachingdown,se- lectedastoneandputitinthesling。Withallhisstrengthhedrewbacktheheavyrubberbandsandthestonewhistledthroughtheair。IthitJesse,whohadentirelyforgottentheboyandwaspursuingthelamb,squarelyinthehead。Withagroanhepitchedforwardandfellalmostattheboy\'sfeet。WhenDavidsawthathelaystillandthathewasappar- entlydead,hisfrightincreasedimmeasurably。Itbe- cameaninsanepanic。 Withacryheturnedandranoffthroughthewoodsweepingconvulsively。\"Idon\'tcare——Ikilledhim,butIdon\'tcare,\"hesobbed。AsheranonandonhedecidedsuddenlythathewouldnevergobackagaintotheBentleyfarmsortothetownofWinesburg。\"IhavekilledthemanofGodandnowIwillmyselfbeamanandgointotheworld,\"hesaidstoutlyashestoppedrunningandwalkedrap- idlydownaroadthatfollowedthewindingsofWineCreekasitranthroughfieldsandforestsintothewest。 OnthegroundbythecreekJesseBentleymoveduneasilyabout。Hegroanedandopenedhiseyes。 Foralongtimehelayperfectlystillandlookedatthesky。Whenatlasthegottohisfeet,hismindwasconfusedandhewasnotsurprisedbytheboy\'sdisappearance。BytheroadsidehesatdownonalogandbegantotalkaboutGod。Thatisalltheyevergotoutofhim。WheneverDavid\'snamewasmentionedhelookedvaguelyattheskyandsaidthatamessengerfromGodhadtakentheboy。\"IthappenedbecauseIwastoogreedyforglory,\"hedeclared,andwouldhavenomoretosayinthematter。 AMANOFIDEAS HELIVEDWITHhismother,agrey,silentwomanwithapeculiarashycomplexion。Thehouseinwhichtheylivedstoodinalittlegroveoftreesbe- yondwherethemainstreetofWinesburgcrossedWineCreek。HisnamewasJoeWelling,andhisfa- therhadbeenamanofsomedignityinthecommu- nity,alawyer,andamemberofthestatelegislatureatColumbus。Joehimselfwassmallofbodyandinhischaracterunlikeanyoneelseintown。Hewaslikeatinylittlevolcanothatliessilentfordaysandthensuddenlyspoutsfire。No,hewasn\'tlikethat—— hewaslikeamanwhoissubjecttofits,onewhowalksamonghisfellowmeninspiringfearbecauseafitmaycomeuponhimsuddenlyandblowhimawayintoastrangeuncannyphysicalstateinwhichhiseyesrollandhislegsandarmsjerk。Hewaslikethat,onlythatthevisitationthatdescendeduponJoeWellingwasamentalandnotaphysicalthing。 Hewasbesetbyideasandinthethroesofoneofhisideaswasuncontrollable。Wordsrolledandtumbledfromhismouth。Apeculiarsmilecameuponhislips。Theedgesofhisteeththatweretippedwithgoldglistenedinthelight。Pouncinguponaby- standerhebegantotalk。Forthebystandertherewasnoescape。Theexcitedmanbreathedintohisface,peeredintohiseyes,poundeduponhischestwithashakingforefinger,demanded,compelledattention。 InthosedaystheStandardOilCompanydidnotdeliveroiltotheconsumerinbigwagonsandmotortrucksasitdoesnow,butdeliveredinsteadtoretailgrocers,hardwarestores,andthelike。JoewastheStandardOilagentinWinesburgandinseveraltownsupanddowntherailroadthatwentthroughWinesburg。Hecollectedbills,bookedorders,anddidotherthings。Hisfather,thelegislator,hadse- curedthejobforhim。 InandoutofthestoresofWinesburgwentJoeWelling——silent,excessivelypolite,intentuponhisbusiness。Menwatchedhimwitheyesinwhichlurkedamusementtemperedbyalarm。Theywerewaitingforhimtobreakforth,preparingtoflee。 Althoughtheseizuresthatcameuponhimwereharmlessenough,theycouldnotbelaughedaway。 Theywereoverwhelming。Astrideanidea,Joewasovermastering。Hispersonalitybecamegigantic。Itoverrodethemantowhomhetalked,swepthimaway,sweptallaway,allwhostoodwithinsoundofhisvoice。 InSylvesterWest\'sDrugStorestoodfourmenwhoweretalkingofhorseracing。WesleyMoyer\'sstallion,TonyTip,wastoraceattheJunemeetingatTiffin,Ohio,andtherewasarumorthathewouldmeetthestiffestcompetitionofhiscareer。ItwassaidthatPopGeers,thegreatracingdriver,wouldhimselfbethere。AdoubtofthesuccessofTonyTiphungheavyintheairofWinesburg。 IntothedrugstorecameJoeWelling,brushingthescreendoorviolentlyaside。Withastrangeab- sorbedlightinhiseyeshepounceduponEdThomas,hewhoknewPopGeersandwhoseopin- ionofTonyTip\'schanceswasworthconsidering。 \"ThewaterisupinWineCreek,\"criedJoeWel- lingwiththeairofPheidippidesbringingnewsofthevictoryoftheGreeksinthestruggleatMara- thon。HisfingerbeatatattoouponEdThomas\'sbroadchest。\"ByTrunionbridgeitiswithinelevenandahalfinchesoftheflooring,\"hewenton,thewordscomingquicklyandwithalittlewhistlingnoisefrombetweenhisteeth。Anexpressionofhelp- lessannoyancecreptoverthefacesofthefour。 \"Ihavemyfactscorrect。Dependuponthat。I wenttoSinnings\'HardwareStoreandgotarule。 ThenIwentbackandmeasured。Icouldhardlybe- lievemyowneyes。Ithasn\'trainedyouseefortendays。AtfirstIdidn\'tknowwhattothink。Thoughtsrushedthroughmyhead。Ithoughtofsubterraneanpassagesandsprings。Downunderthegroundwentmymind,delvingabout。Isatonthefloorofthebridgeandrubbedmyhead。Therewasn\'tacloudinthesky,notone。Comeoutintothestreetandyou\'llsee。Therewasn\'tacloud。Thereisn\'tacloudnow。Yes,therewasacloud。Idon\'twanttokeepbackanyfacts。Therewasacloudinthewestdownnearthehorizon,acloudnobiggerthanaman\'shand。 \"NotthatIthinkthathasanythingtodowithit。 Thereitis,yousee。YouunderstandhowpuzzledI was。 \"Thenanideacametome。Ilaughed。You\'lllaugh,too。OfcourseitrainedoverinMedinaCounty。That\'sinteresting,eh?Ifwehadnotrains,nomails,notelegraph,wewouldknowthatitrainedoverinMedinaCounty。That\'swhereWineCreekcomesfrom。Everyoneknowsthat。LittleoldWineCreekbroughtusthenews。That\'sinteresting。 Ilaughed。IthoughtI\'dtellyou——it\'sinteresting,eh?\" JoeWellingturnedandwentoutatthedoor。Tak- ingabookfromhispocket,hestoppedandranafingerdownoneofthepages。Againhewasab- sorbedinhisdutiesasagentoftheStandardOilCompany。\"Hern\'sGrocerywillbegettinglowoncoaloil。I\'llseethem,\"hemuttered,hurryingalongthestreet,andbowingpolitelytotherightandleftatthepeoplewalkingpast。 WhenGeorgeWillardwenttoworkfortheWines- burgEaglehewasbesiegedbyJoeWelling。Joeen- viedtheboy。ItseemedtohimthathewasmeantbyNaturetobeareporteronanewspaper。\"ItiswhatIshouldbedoing,thereisnodoubtofthat,\" hedeclared,stoppingGeorgeWillardontheside- walkbeforeDaugherty\'sFeedStore。Hiseyesbegantoglistenandhisforefingertotremble。\"OfcourseImakemoremoneywiththeStandardOilCompanyandI\'monlytellingyou,\"headded。\"I\'vegotnoth- ingagainstyoubutIshouldhaveyourplace。Icoulddotheworkatoddmoments。HereandthereI wouldrunfindingoutthingsyou\'llneversee。\" BecomingmoreexcitedJoeWellingcrowdedtheyoungreporteragainstthefrontofthefeedstore。 Heappearedtobelostinthought,rollinghiseyesaboutandrunningathinnervoushandthroughhishair。Asmilespreadoverhisfaceandhisgoldteethglittered。\"Yougetoutyournotebook,\"hecom- manded。\"Youcarryalittlepadofpaperinyourpocket,don\'tyou?Iknewyoudid。Well,yousetthisdown。Ithoughtofittheotherday。Let\'stakedecay。Nowwhatisdecay?It\'sfire。Itburnsupwoodandotherthings。Youneverthoughtofthat? Ofcoursenot。Thissidewalkhereandthisfeedstore,thetreesdownthestreetthere——they\'reallonfire。They\'reburningup。Decayyouseeisalwaysgoingon。Itdoesn\'tstop。Waterandpaintcan\'tstopit。Ifathingisiron,thenwhat?Itrusts,yousee。 That\'sfire,too。Theworldisonfire。Startyourpiecesinthepaperthatway。Justsayinbigletters\'TheWorldIsOnFire。\'Thatwillmake\'emlookup。 They\'llsayyou\'reasmartone。Idon\'tcare。Idon\'tenvyyou。Ijustsnatchedthatideaoutoftheair。I wouldmakeanewspaperhum。Yougottoadmitthat。\"\' Turningquickly,JoeWellingwalkedrapidlyaway。 Whenhehadtakenseveralstepshestoppedandlookedback。\"I\'mgoingtosticktoyou,\"hesaid。 \"I\'mgoingtomakeyouaregularhummer。Ishouldstartanewspapermyself,that\'swhatIshoulddo。 I\'dbeamarvel。Everybodyknowsthat。\" WhenGeorgeWillardhadbeenforayearontheWinesburgEagle,fourthingshappenedtoJoeWel- ling。Hismotherdied,hecametoliveattheNewWillardHouse,hebecameinvolvedinaloveaffair,andheorganizedtheWinesburgBaseballClub。 Joeorganizedthebaseballclubbecausehewantedtobeacoachandinthatpositionhebegantowintherespectofhistownsmen。\"Heisawonder,\"theydeclaredafterJoe\'steamhadwhippedtheteamfromMedinaCounty。\"Hegetseverybodyworkingtogether。Youjustwatchhim。\" UponthebaseballfieldJoeWellingstoodbyfirstbase,hiswholebodyquiveringwithexcitement。Inspiteofthemselvesalltheplayerswatchedhimclosely。Theopposingpitcherbecameconfused。 \"Now!Now!Now!Now!\"shoutedtheexcitedman。\"Watchme!Watchme!Watchmyfingers! Watchmyhands!Watchmyfeet!Watchmyeyes! Let\'sworktogetherhere!Watchme!Inmeyouseeallthemovementsofthegame!Workwithme! Workwithme!Watchme!Watchme!Watchme!\" WithrunnersoftheWinesburgteamonbases,JoeWellingbecameasoneinspired。Beforetheyknewwhathadcomeoverthem,thebaserunnerswerewatchingtheman,edgingoffthebases,advancing,retreating,heldasbyaninvisiblecord。TheplayersoftheopposingteamalsowatchedJoe。Theywerefascinated。Foramomenttheywatchedandthen,asthoughtobreakaspellthathungoverthem,theybeganhurlingtheballwildlyabout,andamidase- riesoffierceanimal-likecriesfromthecoach,therunnersoftheWinesburgteamscamperedhome。 JoeWelling\'sloveaffairsetthetownofWinesburgonedge。Whenitbeganeveryonewhisperedandshookhishead。Whenpeopletriedtolaugh,thelaughterwasforcedandunnatural。JoefellinlovewithSarahKing,alean,sad-lookingwomanwholivedwithherfatherandbrotherinabrickhousethatstoodoppositethegateleadingtotheWines- burgCemetery。 ThetwoKings,Edwardthefather,andTomtheson,werenotpopularinWinesburg。Theywerecalledproudanddangerous。TheyhadcometoWinesburgfromsomeplaceintheSouthandranacidermillontheTrunionPike。TomKingwasre- portedtohavekilledamanbeforehecametoWinesburg。Hewastwenty-sevenyearsoldandrodeabouttownonagreypony。Alsohehadalongyellowmustachethatdroppeddownoverhisteeth,andalwayscarriedaheavy,wicked-lookingwalkingstickinhishand。Oncehekilledadogwiththestick。ThedogbelongedtoWinPawsey,theshoemerchant,andstoodonthesidewalkwaggingitstail。TomKingkilleditwithoneblow。Hewasar- restedandpaidafineoftendollars。 OldEdwardKingwassmallofstatureandwhenhepassedpeopleinthestreetlaughedaqueerun- mirthfullaugh。Whenhelaughedhescratchedhisleftelbowwithhisrighthand。Thesleeveofhiscoatwasalmostwornthroughfromthehabit。Ashewalkedalongthestreet,lookingnervouslyaboutandlaughing,heseemedmoredangerousthanhissilent,fierce-lookingson。 WhenSarahKingbeganwalkingoutintheeve- ningwithJoeWelling,peopleshooktheirheadsinalarm。Shewastallandpaleandhaddarkringsunderhereyes。Thecouplelookedridiculousto- gether。UnderthetreestheywalkedandJoetalked。 Hispassionateeagerprotestationsoflove,heardcomingoutofthedarknessbythecemeterywall,orfromthedeepshadowsofthetreesonthehillthatranuptotheFairGroundsfromWaterworksPond,wererepeatedinthestores。MenstoodbythebarintheNewWillardHouselaughingandtalkingofJoe\'scourtship。Afterthelaughtercamethesilence。 TheWinesburgbaseballteam,underhismanage- ment,waswinninggameaftergame,andthetownhadbeguntorespecthim。Sensingatragedy,theywaited,laughingnervously。 LateonaSaturdayafternoonthemeetingbetweenJoeWellingandthetwoKings,theanticipationofwhichhadsetthetownonedge,tookplaceinJoeWelling\'sroomintheNewWillardHouse。GeorgeWillardwasawitnesstothemeeting。Itcameaboutinthisway: WhentheyoungreporterwenttohisroomaftertheeveningmealhesawTomKingandhisfathersittinginthehalfdarknessinJoe\'sroom。Thesonhadtheheavywalkingstickinhishandandsatnearthedoor。OldEdwardKingwalkednervouslyabout,scratchinghisleftelbowwithhisrighthand。Thehallwayswereemptyandsilent。 GeorgeWillardwenttohisownroomandsatdownathisdesk。Hetriedtowritebuthishandtrembledsothathecouldnotholdthepen。Healsowalkednervouslyupanddown。LiketherestofthetownofWinesburghewasperplexedandknewnotwhattodo。 Itwasseven-thirtyandfastgrowingdarkwhenJoeWellingcamealongthestationplatformtowardtheNewWillardHouse。Inhisarmsheheldabun- dleofweedsandgrasses。Inspiteoftheterrorthatmadehisbodyshake,GeorgeWillardwasamusedatthesightofthesmallspryfigureholdingthegrassesandhalfrunningalongtheplatform。 Shakingwithfrightandanxiety,theyoungre- porterlurkedinthehallwayoutsidethedooroftheroominwhichJoeWellingtalkedtothetwoKings。 Therehadbeenanoath,thenervousgiggleofoldEdwardKing,andthensilence。NowthevoiceofJoeWelling,sharpandclear,brokeforth。GeorgeWillardbegantolaugh。Heunderstood。Ashehadsweptallmenbeforehim,sonowJoeWellingwascarryingthetwomenintheroomofftheirfeetwithatidalwaveofwords。Thelistenerinthehallwalkedupanddown,lostinamazement。 InsidetheroomJoeWellinghadpaidnoattentiontothegrumbledthreatofTomKing。Absorbedinanideaheclosedthedoorand,lightingalamp,spreadthehandfulofweedsandgrassesuponthefloor。\"I\'vegotsomethinghere,\"heannouncedsol- emnly。\"IwasgoingtotellGeorgeWillardaboutit,lethimmakeapieceoutofitforthepaper。I\'mgladyou\'rehere。IwishSarahwereherealso。I\'vebeengoingtocometoyourhouseandtellyouofsomeofmyideas。They\'reinteresting。Sarahwouldn\'tletme。Shesaidwe\'dquarrel。That\'sfoolish。\" Runningupanddownbeforethetwoperplexedmen,JoeWellingbegantoexplain。\"Don\'tyoumakeamistakenow,\"hecried。\"Thisissomethingbig。\" Hisvoicewasshrillwithexcitement。\"Youjustfol- lowme,you\'llbeinterested。Iknowyouwill。Sup- posethis——supposeallofthewheat,thecorn,theoats,thepeas,thepotatoes,wereallbysomemira- clesweptaway。Nowhereweare,yousee,inthiscounty。Thereisahighfencebuiltallaroundus。 We\'llsupposethat。Noonecangetoverthefenceandallthefruitsoftheeartharedestroyed,nothingleftbutthesewildthings,thesegrasses。Wouldwebedonefor?Iaskyouthat。Wouldwebedonefor?\" AgainTomKinggrowledandforamomenttherewassilenceintheroom。ThenagainJoeplungedintotheexpositionofhisidea。\"Thingswouldgohardforatime。Iadmitthat。I\'vegottoadmitthat。 Nogettingaroundit。We\'dbehardputtoit。Morethanonefatstomachwouldcavein。Buttheycouldn\'tdownus。Ishouldsaynot。\" TomKinglaughedgoodnaturedlyandtheshiv- ery,nervouslaughofEdwardKingrangthroughthehouse。JoeWellinghurriedon。\"We\'dbegin,yousee,tobreedupnewvegetablesandfruits。Soonwe\'dregainallwehadlost。Mind,Idon\'tsaythenewthingswouldbethesameastheold。Theywouldn\'t。Maybethey\'dbebetter,maybenotsogood。That\'sinteresting,eh?Youcanthinkaboutthat。Itstartsyourmindworking,nowdon\'tit?\" IntheroomtherewassilenceandthenagainoldEdwardKinglaughednervously。\"Say,IwishSarahwashere,\"criedJoeWelling。\"Let\'sgouptoyourhouse。Iwanttotellherofthis。\" Therewasascrapingofchairsintheroom。ItwasthenthatGeorgeWillardretreatedtohisownroom。 LeaningoutatthewindowhesawJoeWellinggoingalongthestreetwiththetwoKings。TomKingwasforcedtotakeextraordinarylongstridestokeeppacewiththelittleman。Ashestrodealong,heleanedover,listening——absorbed,fascinated。JoeWellingagaintalkedexcitedly。\"Takemilkweednow,\"hecried。\"Alotmightbedonewithmilk- weed,eh?It\'salmostunbelievable。Iwantyoutothinkaboutit。Iwantyoutwotothinkaboutit。 Therewouldbeanewvegetablekingdomyousee。 It\'sinteresting,eh?It\'sanidea。WaittillyouseeSarah,she\'llgettheidea。She\'llbeinterested。Sarahisalwaysinterestedinideas。Youcan\'tbetoosmartforSarah,nowcanyou?Ofcourseyoucan\'t。Youknowthat。\" ADVENTURE ALICEHINDMAN,awomanoftwenty-sevenwhenGeorgeWillardwasamereboy,hadlivedinWines- burgallherlife。SheclerkedinWinney\'sDryGoodsStoreandlivedwithhermother,whohadmarriedasecondhusband。 Alice\'sstep-fatherwasacarriagepainter,andgiventodrink。Hisstoryisanoddone。Itwillbeworthtellingsomeday。 Attwenty-sevenAlicewastallandsomewhatslight。Herheadwaslargeandovershadowedherbody。Hershoulderswerealittlestoopedandherhairandeyesbrown。Shewasveryquietbutbeneathaplacidexterioracontinualfermentwenton。 Whenshewasagirlofsixteenandbeforeshebegantoworkinthestore,Alicehadanaffairwithayoungman。Theyoungman,namedNedCurrie,wasolderthanAlice。He,likeGeorgeWillard,wasemployedontheWinesburgEagleandforalongtimehewenttoseeAlicealmosteveryevening。Togetherthetwowalkedunderthetreesthroughthestreetsofthetownandtalkedofwhattheywoulddowiththeirlives。AlicewasthenaveryprettygirlandNedCurrietookherintohisarmsandkissedher。HebecameexcitedandsaidthingshedidnotintendtosayandAlice,betrayedbyherdesiretohavesome- thingbeautifulcomeintoherrathernarrowlife,alsogrewexcited。Shealsotalked。Theoutercrustofherlife,allofhernaturaldiffidenceandreserve,wastomawayandshegaveherselfovertotheemotionsoflove。When,lateinthefallofhersixteenthyear,NedCurriewentawaytoClevelandwherehehopedtogetaplaceonacitynewspaperandriseintheworld,shewantedtogowithhim。Withatremblingvoiceshetoldhimwhatwasinhermind。\"Iwillworkandyoucanwork,\"shesaid。\"Idonotwanttoharnessyoutoaneedlessexpensethatwillpre- ventyourmakingprogress。Don\'tmarrymenow。 Wewillgetalongwithoutthatandwecanbeto- gether。Eventhoughweliveinthesamehousenoonewillsayanything。Inthecitywewillbeun- knownandpeoplewillpaynoattentiontous。\" NedCurriewaspuzzledbythedeterminationandabandonofhissweetheartandwasalsodeeplytouched。Hehadwantedthegirltobecomehismis- tressbutchangedhismind。Hewantedtoprotectandcareforher。\"Youdon\'tknowwhatyou\'retalk- ingabout,\"hesaidsharply;\"youmaybesureI\'llletyoudonosuchthing。AssoonasIgetagoodjobI\'llcomeback。Forthepresentyou\'llhavetostayhere。It\'stheonlythingwecando。\" OntheeveningbeforeheleftWinesburgtotakeuphisnewlifeinthecity,NedCurriewenttocallonAlice。TheywalkedaboutthroughthestreetsforanhourandthengotarigfromWesleyMoyer\'sliveryandwentforadriveinthecountry。Themooncameupandtheyfoundthemselvesunabletotalk。 Inhissadnesstheyoungmanforgottheresolutionshehadmaderegardinghisconductwiththegirl。 TheygotoutofthebuggyataplacewherealongmeadowrandowntothebankofWineCreekandthereinthedimlightbecamelovers。Whenatmid- nighttheyreturnedtotowntheywerebothglad。Itdidnotseemtothemthatanythingthatcouldhap- peninthefuturecouldblotoutthewonderandbeautyofthethingthathadhappened。\"Nowwewillhavetosticktoeachother,whateverhappenswewillhavetodothat,\"NedCurriesaidasheleftthegirlatherfather\'sdoor。 Theyoungnewspapermandidnotsucceedinget- tingaplaceonaClevelandpaperandwentwesttoChicago。ForatimehewaslonelyandwrotetoAlicealmosteveryday。Thenhewascaughtupbythelifeofthecity;hebegantomakefriendsandfoundnewinterestsinlife。InChicagoheboardedatahousewheretherewereseveralwomen。OneofthemattractedhisattentionandheforgotAliceinWinesburg。Attheendofayearhehadstoppedwritingletters,andonlyonceinalongtime,whenhewaslonelyorwhenhewentintooneofthecityparksandsawthemoonshiningonthegrassasithadshonethatnightonthemeadowbyWineCreek,didhethinkofheratall。 InWinesburgthegirlwhohadbeenlovedgrewtobeawoman。Whenshewastwenty-twoyearsoldherfather,whoownedaharnessrepairshop,diedsuddenly。Theharnessmakerwasanoldsoldier,andafterafewmonthshiswifereceivedawidow\'spension。Sheusedthefirstmoneyshegottobuyaloomandbecameaweaverofcarpets,andAlicegotaplaceinWinney\'sstore。ForanumberofyearsnothingcouldhaveinducedhertobelievethatNedCurriewouldnotintheendreturntoher。 Shewasgladtobeemployedbecausethedailyroundoftoilinthestoremadethetimeofwaitingseemlesslonganduninteresting。Shebegantosavemoney,thinkingthatwhenshehadsavedtwoorthreehundreddollarsshewouldfollowherlovertothecityandtryifherpresencewouldnotwinbackhisaffections。 AlicedidnotblameNedCurrieforwhathadhap- penedinthemoonlightinthefield,butfeltthatshecouldnevermarryanotherman。ToherthethoughtofgivingtoanotherwhatshestillfeltcouldbelongonlytoNedseemedmonstrous。Whenotheryoungmentriedtoattractherattentionshewouldhavenothingtodowiththem。\"Iamhiswifeandshallremainhiswifewhetherhecomesbackornot,\"shewhisperedtoherself,andforallofherwillingnesstosupportherselfcouldnothaveunderstoodthegrowingmodernideaofawoman\'sowningherselfandgivingandtakingforherownendsinlife。 Aliceworkedinthedrygoodsstorefromeightinthemorninguntilsixatnightandonthreeeveningsaweekwentbacktothestoretostayfromsevenuntilnine。Astimepassedandshebecamemoreandmorelonelyshebegantopracticethedevicescommontolonelypeople。Whenatnightshewentupstairsintoherownroomshekneltonthefloortoprayandinherprayerswhisperedthingsshewantedtosaytoherlover。Shebecameattachedtoinanimateobjects,andbecauseitwasherown,couldnotbaretohaveanyonetouchthefurnitureofherroom。Thetrickofsavingmoney,begunforapurpose,wascarriedonaftertheschemeofgoingtothecitytofindNedCurriehadbeengivenup。Itbecameafixedhabit,andwhensheneedednewclothesshedidnotgetthem。Sometimesonrainyafternoonsinthestoreshegotoutherbankbookand,lettingitlieopenbeforeher,spenthoursdreamingimpossibledreamsofsavingmoneyenoughsothattheinterestwouldsupportbothherselfandherfuturehusband。 \"Nedalwayslikedtotravelabout,\"shethought。 \"I\'llgivehimthechance。SomedaywhenwearemarriedandIcansavebothhismoneyandmyown,wewillberich。Thenwecantraveltogetherallovertheworld。\" InthedrygoodsstoreweeksranintomonthsandmonthsintoyearsasAlicewaitedanddreamedofherlover\'sreturn。Heremployer,agreyoldmanwithfalseteethandathingreymustachethatdroopeddownoverhismouth,wasnotgiventoconversation,andsometimes,onrainydaysandinthewinterwhenastormragedinMainStreet,longhourspassedwhennocustomerscamein。Alicear- rangedandrearrangedthestock。Shestoodnearthefrontwindowwhereshecouldlookdownthede- sertedstreetandthoughtoftheeveningswhenshehadwalkedwithNedCurrieandofwhathehadsaid。\"Wewillhavetosticktoeachothernow。\"Thewordsechoedandre-echoedthroughthemindofthematuringwoman。Tearscameintohereyes。 Sometimeswhenheremployerhadgoneoutandshewasaloneinthestoresheputherheadonthecounterandwept。\"Oh,Ned,Iamwaiting,\"shewhisperedoverandover,andallthetimethecreep- ingfearthathewouldnevercomebackgrewstrongerwithinher。 Inthespringwhentherainshavepassedandbe- forethelonghotdaysofsummerhavecome,thecountryaboutWinesburgisdelightful。Thetownliesinthemidstofopenfields,butbeyondthefieldsarepleasantpatchesofwoodlands。Inthewoodedplacesaremanylittlecloisterednooks,quietplaceswhereloversgotositonSundayafternoons。Throughthetreestheylookoutacrossthefieldsandseefarmersatworkaboutthebarnsorpeopledrivingupanddownontheroads。Inthetownbellsringandoccasionallyatrainpasses,lookinglikeatoythinginthedistance。 ForseveralyearsafterNedCurriewentawayAlicedidnotgointothewoodwiththeotheryoungpeopleonSunday,butonedayafterhehadbeengonefortwoorthreeyearsandwhenherlonelinessseemedunbearable,sheputonherbestdressandsetout。Findingalittleshelteredplacefromwhichshecouldseethetownandalongstretchofthefields,shesatdown。Fearofageandineffectualitytookpossessionofher。Shecouldnotsitstill,andarose。Asshestoodlookingoutoverthelandsome- thing,perhapsthethoughtofneverceasinglifeasitexpressesitselfintheflowoftheseasons,fixedhermindonthepassingyears。Withashiverofdread,sherealizedthatforherthebeautyandfresh- nessofyouthhadpassed。Forthefirsttimeshefeltthatshehadbeencheated。ShedidnotblameNedCurrieanddidnotknowwhattoblame。Sadnesssweptoverher。Droppingtoherknees,shetriedtopray,butinsteadofprayerswordsofprotestcametoherlips。\"Itisnotgoingtocometome。Iwillneverfindhappiness。WhydoItellmyselflies?\" shecried,andanoddsenseofreliefcamewiththis,herfirstboldattempttofacethefearthathadbe- comeapartofhereverydaylife。 IntheyearwhenAliceHindmanbecametwenty- fivetwothingshappenedtodisturbthedullun- eventfulnessofherdays。HermothermarriedBushMilton,thecarriagepainterofWinesburg,andsheherselfbecameamemberoftheWinesburgMethod- istChurch。Alicejoinedthechurchbecauseshehadbecomefrightenedbythelonelinessofherpositioninlife。Hermother\'ssecondmarriagehadempha- sizedherisolation。\"Iambecomingoldandqueer。 IfNedcomeshewillnotwantme。Inthecitywhereheislivingmenareperpetuallyyoung。Thereissomuchgoingonthattheydonothavetimetogrowold,\"shetoldherselfwithagrimlittlesmile,andwentresolutelyaboutthebusinessofbecomingac- quaintedwithpeople。EveryThursdayeveningwhenthestorehadclosedshewenttoaprayermeetinginthebasementofthechurchandonSundayeveningattendedameetingofanorganizationcalledTheEpworthLeague。 WhenWillHurley,amiddle-agedmanwhoclerkedinadrugstoreandwhoalsobelongedtothechurch,offeredtowalkhomewithhershedidnotprotest。 \"OfcourseIwillnotlethimmakeapracticeofbeingwithme,butifhecomestoseemeonceinalongtimetherecanbenoharminthat,\"shetoldherself,stilldeterminedinherloyaltytoNedCurrie。 Withoutrealizingwhatwashappening,Alicewastryingfeeblyatfirst,butwithgrowingdetermina- tion,togetanewholduponlife。Besidethedrugclerkshewalkedinsilence,butsometimesinthedarknessastheywentstolidlyalongsheputoutherhandandtouchedsoftlythefoldsofhiscoat。Whenheleftheratthegatebeforehermother\'shouseshedidnotgoindoors,butstoodforamomentbythedoor。Shewantedtocalltothedrugclerk,toaskhimtositwithherinthedarknessontheporchbeforethehouse,butwasafraidhewouldnotun- derstand。\"ItisnothimthatIwant,\"shetoldher- self;\"Iwanttoavoidbeingsomuchalone。IfIamnotcarefulIwillgrowunaccustomedtobeingwithpeople。\" Duringtheearlyfallofhertwenty-seventhyearapassionaterestlessnesstookpossessionofAlice。Shecouldnotbeartobeinthecompanyofthedrugclerk,andwhen,intheevening,hecametowalkwithhershesenthimaway。Hermindbecamein- tenselyactiveandwhen,wearyfromthelonghoursofstandingbehindthecounterinthestore,shewenthomeandcrawledintobed,shecouldnotsleep。Withstaringeyesshelookedintothedark- ness。Herimagination,likeachildawakenedfromlongsleep,playedabouttheroom。Deepwithinhertherewassomethingthatwouldnotbecheatedbyphantasiesandthatdemandedsomedefiniteanswerfromlife。 Alicetookapillowintoherarmsandheldittightlyagainstherbreasts。Gettingoutofbed,shearrangedablanketsothatinthedarknessitlookedlikeaformlyingbetweenthesheetsand,kneelingbesidethebed,shecaressedit,whisperingwordsoverandover,likearefrain。\"Whydoesn\'tsome- thinghappen?WhyamIleftherealone?\"shemut- tered。AlthoughshesometimesthoughtofNedCurrie,shenolongerdependedonhim。Herdesirehadgrownvague。ShedidnotwantNedCurrieoranyotherman。Shewantedtobeloved,tohavesomethinganswerthecallthatwasgrowinglouderandlouderwithinher。 AndthenonenightwhenitrainedAlicehadanadventure。Itfrightenedandconfusedher。Shehadcomehomefromthestoreatnineandfoundthehouseempty。BushMiltonhadgoneofftotownandhermothertothehouseofaneighbor。Alicewentupstairstoherroomandundressedinthedarkness。 Foramomentshestoodbythewindowhearingtherainbeatagainsttheglassandthenastrangedesiretookpossessionofher。Withoutstoppingtothinkofwhatsheintendedtodo,sherandownstairsthroughthedarkhouseandoutintotherain。Asshestoodonthelittlegrassplotbeforethehouseandfeltthecoldrainonherbodyamaddesiretorunnakedthroughthestreetstookpossessionofher。 Shethoughtthattherainwouldhavesomecre- ativeandwonderfuleffectonherbody。Notforyearshadshefeltsofullofyouthandcourage。Shewantedtoleapandrun,tocryout,tofindsomeotherlonelyhumanandembracehim。Onthebricksidewalkbeforethehouseamanstumbledhome- ward。Alicestartedtorun。Awild,desperatemoodtookpossessionofher。\"WhatdoIcarewhoitis。 Heisalone,andIwillgotohim,\"shethought;andthenwithoutstoppingtoconsiderthepossibleresultofhermadness,calledsoftly。\"Wait!\"shecried。 \"Don\'tgoaway。Whoeveryouare,youmustwait。\" Themanonthesidewalkstoppedandstoodlis- tening。Hewasanoldmanandsomewhatdeaf。 Puttinghishandtohismouth,heshouted。\"What? Whatsay?\"hecalled。 Alicedroppedtothegroundandlaytrembling。 Shewassofrightenedatthethoughtofwhatshehaddonethatwhenthemanhadgoneonhiswayshedidnotdaregettoherfeet,butcrawledonhandsandkneesthroughthegrasstothehouse。 Whenshegottoherownroomsheboltedthedooranddrewherdressingtableacrossthedoorway。 Herbodyshookaswithachillandherhandstrem- bledsothatshehaddifficultygettingintohernight- dress。Whenshegotintobedsheburiedherfaceinthepillowandweptbrokenheartedly。\"Whatisthematterwithme?IwilldosomethingdreadfulifI amnotcareful,\"shethought,andturningherfacetothewall,begantryingtoforceherselftofacebravelythefactthatmanypeoplemustliveanddiealone,eveninWinesburg。 RESPECTABILITY IFYOUHAVElivedincitiesandhavewalkedintheparkonasummerafternoon,youhaveperhapsseen,blinkinginacornerofhisironcage,ahuge,grotesquekindofmonkey,acreaturewithugly,sag- ging,hairlessskinbelowhiseyesandabrightpur- pleunderbody。Thismonkeyisatruemonster。Inthecompletenessofhisuglinessheachievedakindofpervertedbeauty。Childrenstoppingbeforethecagearefascinated,menturnawaywithanairofdisgust,andwomenlingerforamoment,tryingper- hapstorememberwhichoneoftheirmaleacquain- tancesthethinginsomefaintwayresembles。