第2章

类别:其他 作者:Jack London字数:16558更新时间:18/12/14 15:44:31
Hehadgrowntaller;butwithhisincreasedheightheseemedleanerthanever。Also,hewasmorenervous。Withthenervousnessincreasedhispeevishnessandirritability。Thechildrenhadlearnedbymanybitterlessonstofightshyofhim。Hismotherrespectedhimforhisearningpower,butsomehowherrespectwastincturedwithfear。 Therewasnojoyousnessinlifeforhim。Theprocessionofthedaysheneversaw。Thenightshesleptawayintwitchingunconsciousness。Therestofthetimeheworked,andhisconsciousnesswasmachineconsciousness。Outsidethishismindwasablank。Hehadnoideals,andbutoneillusion;namely,thathedrankexcellentcoffee。Hewasawork- beast。Hehadnomentallifewhatever;yetdeepdowninthecryptsofhismind,unknowntohim,werebeingweighedandsiftedeveryhourofhistoil,everymovementofhishands,everytwitchofhismuscles,andpreparationsweremakingforafuturecourseofactionthatwouldamazehimandallhislittleworld。 Itwasinthelatespringthathecamehomefromworkonenightawareofunusualtiredness。Therewasakeenexpectancyintheairashesatdowntothetable,buthedidnotnotice。Hewentthroughthemealinmoodysilence,mechanicallyeatingwhatwasbeforehim。Thechildrenum\'dandah\'dandmadesmackingnoiseswiththeirmouths。Buthewasdeaftothem。 \"D\'yeknowwhatyou\'reeatin\'?\"hismotherdemandedatlast,desperately。 Helookedvacantlyatthedishbeforehim,andvacantlyather。 \"Floatin\'island,\"sheannouncedtriumphantly。 \"Oh,\"hesaid。 \"Floatingisland!\"thechildrenchorussedloudly。 \"Oh,\"hesaid。Andaftertwoorthreemouthfuls,headded,\"IguessI ain\'thungryto-night。\" Hedroppedthespoon,shovedbackhischair,andarosewearilyfromthetable。 \"An\'IguessI\'llgotobed。\" Hisfeetdraggedmoreheavilythanusualashecrossedthekitchenfloor。 UndressingwasaTitan\'stask,amonstrousfutility,andheweptweaklyashecrawledintobed,oneshoestillon。Hewasawareofarising,swellingsomethinginsidehisheadthatmadehisbrainthickandfuzzy。Hisleanfingersfeltasbigashiswrist,whileintheendsofthemwasaremotenessofsensationvagueandfuzzylikehisbrain。Thesmallofhisbackachedintolerably。Allhisbonesached。Heachedeverywhere。Andinhisheadbegantheshrieking,pounding,crashing,roaringofamillionlooms。Allspacewasfilledwithflyingshuttles。Theydartedinandout,intricately,amongstthestars。Heworkedathousandloomshimself,andevertheyspeededup,fasterandfaster,andhisbrainunwound,fasterandfaster,andbecamethethreadthatfedthethousandflyingshuttles。 Hedidnotgotoworknextmorning。Hewastoobusyweavingcolossallyonthethousandloomsthatraninsidehishead。Hismotherwenttowork,butfirstshesentforthedoctor。Itwasasevereattackoflagrippe,hesaid。Jennieservedasnurseandcarriedouthisinstructions。 Itwasaverysevereattack,anditwasaweekbeforeJohnnydressedandtotteredfeeblyacrossthefloor。Anotherweek,thedoctorsaid,andhewouldbefittoreturntowork。TheforemanoftheloomroomvisitedhimonSundayafternoon,thefirstdayofhisconvalescence。Thebestweaverintheroom,theforemantoldhismother。Hisjobwouldbeheldforhim。 HecouldcomebacktoworkaweekfromMonday。 \"Whydon\'tyouthank\'im,Johnny?\"hismotheraskedanxiously。 \"He\'sbenthatsickheain\'thimselfyet,\"sheexplainedapologeticallytothevisitor。 Johnnysathunchedupandgazingsteadfastlyatthefloor。Hesatinthesamepositionlongaftertheforemanhadgone。Itwaswarmoutdoors,andhesatonthestoopintheafternoon。Sometimeshislipsmoved。Heseemedlostinendlesscalculations。 Nextmorning,afterthedaygrewwarm,hetookhisseatonthestoop。Hehadpencilandpaperthistimewithwhichtocontinuehiscalculations,andhecalculatedpainfullyandamazingly。 \"Whatcomesaftermillions?\"heaskedatnoon,whenWillcamehomefromschool。\"An\'howd\'yework\'em?\" Thatafternoonfinishedhistask。Eachday,butwithoutpaperandpencil,hereturnedtothestoop。Hewasgreatlyabsorbedintheonetreethatgrewacrossthestreet。Hestudieditforhoursatatime,andwasunusuallyinterestedwhenthewindswayeditsbranchesandfluttereditsleaves。Throughouttheweekheseemedlostinagreatcommunionwithhimself。OnSunday,sittingonthestoop,helaughedaloud,severaltimes,totheperturbationofhismother,whohadnotheardhimlaughforyears。 Nextmorning,intheearlydarkness,shecametohisbedtorousehim。Hehadhadhisfillofsleepalltheweek,andawokeeasily。Hemadenostruggle,nordidheattempttoholdontothebeddingwhenshestrippeditfromhim。Helayquietly,andspokequietly。 \"Itain\'tnouse,ma。\" \"You\'llbelate,\"shesaid,undertheimpressionthathewasstillstupidwithsleep。 \"I\'mawake,ma,an\'Itellyouitain\'tnouse。Youmightaswelllemmealone。Iain\'tgoin\'togitup。\" \"Butyou\'llloseyourjob!\"shecried。 \"Iain\'tgoin\'togitup,\"herepeatedinastrange,passionlessvoice。 Shedidnotgotoworkherselfthatmorning。Thiswassicknessbeyondanysicknessshehadeverknown。Feveranddeliriumshecouldunderstand;butthiswasinsanity。ShepulledthebeddingupoverhimandsentJennieforthedoctor。 Whenthatpersonarrived,Johnnywassleepinggently,andgentlyheawokeandallowedhispulsetobetaken。 \"Nothingthematterwithhim,\"thedoctorreported。\"Badlydebilitated,that\'sall。Notmuchmeatonhisbones。\" \"He\'salwaysbeenthatway,\"hismothervolunteered。 \"Nowgo\'way,ma,an\'letmefinishmysnooze。\" Johnnyspokesweetlyandplacidly,andsweetlyandplacidlyherolledoveronhissideandwenttosleep。 Atteno\'clockheawokeanddressedhimself。Hewalkedoutintothekitchen,wherehefoundhismotherwithafrightenedexpressiononherface。 \"I\'mgoin\'away,ma,\"heannounced,\"an\'Ijes\'wanttosaygood-bye。\" Shethrewherapronoverherheadandsatdownsuddenlyandwept。Hewaitedpatiently。 \"Imighta-knownit,\"shewassobbing。 \"Where?\"shefinallyasked,removingtheapronfromherheadandgazingupathimwithastrickenfaceinwhichtherewaslittlecuriosity。 \"Idon\'tknow——anywhere。\" Ashespoke,thetreeacrossthestreetappearedwithdazzlingbrightnessonhisinnervision。Itseemedtolurkjustunderhiseyelids,andhecouldseeitwheneverhewished。 \"An\'yourjob?\"shequavered。 \"Iain\'tnevergoin\'toworkagain。\" \"MyGod,Johnny!\"shewailed,\"don\'tsaythat!\" Whathehadsaidwasblasphemytoher。AsamotherwhohearsherchilddenyGod,wasJohnny\'smothershockedbyhiswords。 \"What\'sgotintoyou,anyway?\"shedemanded,withalameattemptatimperativeness。 \"Figures,\"heanswered。\"Jes\'figures。I\'vebendoin\'alotoffigurin\' thisweek,an\'it\'smostsurprisin\'。\" \"Idon\'tseewhatthat\'sgottodowithit,\"shesniffled。 Johnnysmiledpatiently,andhismotherwasawareofadistinctshockatthepersistentabsenceofhispeevishnessandirritability。 \"I\'llshowyou,\"hesaid。\"I\'mplum\'tiredout。Whatmakesmetired? Moves。I\'vebenmovin\'eversinceIwasborn。I\'mtiredofmovin\',an\'I ain\'tgoin\'tomoveanymore。RememberwhenIworkedintheglass-house? Iusedtodothreehundreddozenaday。NowIreckonImadeabouttendifferentmovestoeachbottle。That\'sthirty-sixthousan\'movesaday。 Tendays,threehundredan\'sixtythousan\'moves。Onemonth,onemillionan\'eightythousan\'moves。Chuckouttheeightythousan\'\"——hespokewiththecomplacentbeneficenceofaphilanthropist——\"chuckouttheeightythousan\',thatleavesamillionmovesamonth——twelvemillionmovesayear。 \"AttheloomsI\'mmovin\'twic\'stasmuch。Thatmakestwenty-fivemillionmovesayear,an\'itseemstomeI\'vebenamovin\'thatway\'mostamillionyears。 \"NowthisweekIain\'tmovedatall。Iain\'tmadeonemoveinhoursan\' hours。Itellyouitwasswell,jes\'settin\'there,hoursan\'hours,an\' doin\'nothin\'。Iain\'tneverbenhappybefore。Ineverhadanytime。 I\'vebenmovin\'allthetime。Thatain\'tnowaytobehappy。An\'Iain\'tgoingtodoitanymore。I\'mjes\'goin\'toset,an\'set,an\'rest,an\' rest,andthenrestsomemore。\" \"Butwhat\'sgoin\'tocomeofWillan\'thechildren?\"sheaskeddespairingly。 \"That\'sit,\'Willan\'thechildren,\'\"herepeated。 Buttherewasnobitternessinhisvoice。Hehadlongknownhismother\'sambitionfortheyoungerboy,butthethoughtofitnolongerrankled。 Nothingmatteredanymore。Noteventhat。 \"Iknow,ma,whatyou\'vebenplannin\'forWill——keepin\'himinschooltomakeabook-keeperoutofhim。Butitain\'tnouse,I\'vequit。He\'sgottogotowork。\" \"An\'afterIhavebrungyouupthewayIhave,\"shewept,startingtocoverherheadwiththeapronandchanginghermind。 \"Youneverbrungmeup,\"heansweredwithsadkindliness。\"Ibrungmyselfup,ma,an\'IbrungupWill。He\'sbigger\'nme,an\'heavier,an\'taller。 WhenIwasakid,IreckonIdidn\'tgitenoughtoeat。Whenhecomealongan\'wasakid,Iwasworkin\'an\'earnin\'grubforhimtoo。Butthat\'sdonewith。Willcangotowork,sameasme,orhecangotohell,Idon\'tcarewhich。I\'mtired。I\'mgoin\'now。Ain\'tyougoin\'tosaygoodbye?\" Shemadenoreply。Theapronhadgoneoverherheadagain,andshewascrying。Hepausedamomentinthedoorway。 \"I\'msureIdonethebestIknewhow,\"shewassobbing。 Hepassedoutofthehouseanddownthestreet。Awandelightcameintohisfaceatthesightofthelonetree。\"Jes\'ain\'tgoin\'todonothin\',\" hesaidtohimself,halfaloud,inacrooningtone。Heglancedwistfullyupatthesky,butthebrightsundazzledandblindedhim。 Itwasalongwalkhetook,andhedidnotwalkfast。Ittookhimpastthejute-mill。Themuffledroaroftheloomroomcametohisears,andhesmiled。Itwasagentle,placidsmile。Hehatednoone,noteventhepounding,shriekingmachines。Therewasnobitternessinhim,nothingbutaninordinatehungerforrest。 Thehousesandfactoriesthinnedoutandtheopenspacesincreasedasheapproachedthecountry。Atlastthecitywasbehindhim,andhewaswalkingdownaleafylanebesidetherailroadtrack。Hedidnotwalklikeaman。Hedidnotlooklikeaman。Hewasatravestyofthehuman。Itwasatwistedandstuntedandnamelesspieceoflifethatshambledlikeasicklyape,armsloose-hanging,stoop-shouldered,narrow-chested,grotesqueandterrible。 Hepassedbyasmallrailroadstationandlaydowninthegrassunderatree。Allafternoonhelaythere。Sometimeshedozed,withmusclesthattwitchedinhissleep。Whenawake,helaywithoutmovement,watchingthebirdsorlookingupattheskythroughthebranchesofthetreeabovehim。 Onceortwicehelaughedaloud,butwithoutrelevancetoanythinghehadseenorfelt。 Aftertwilighthadgone,inthefirstdarknessofthenight,afreighttrainrumbledintothestation。Whentheenginewasswitchingcarsontotheside-track,Johnnycreptalongthesideofthetrain。Hepulledopentheside-doorofanemptybox-carandawkwardlyandlaboriouslyclimbedin。 Heclosedthedoor。Theenginewhistled。Johnnywaslyingdown,andinthedarknesshesmiled。 AWICKEDWOMAN ItwasbecauseshehadbrokenwithBillythatLorettahadcomevisitingtoSantaClara。Billycouldnotunderstand。Hissisterhadreportedthathehadwalkedthefloorandcriedallnight。Lorettahadnotsleptallnighteither,whileshehadweptmostofthenight。Daisyknewthis,becauseitwasinherarmsthattheweepinghadbeendone。AndDaisy\'shusband,CaptainKitt,knew,too。ThetearsofLoretta,andthecomfortingbyDaisy,hadlosthimsomesleep。 NowCaptainKittdidnotliketolosesleep。NeitherdidhewantLorettatomarryBilly——noranybodyelse。ItwasCaptainKitt\'sbeliefthatDaisyneededthehelpofheryoungersisterinthehousehold。Buthedidnotsaythisaloud。Instead,healwaysinsistedthatLorettawastooyoungtothinkofmarriage。SoitwasCaptainKitt\'sideathatLorettashouldbepackedoffonavisittoMrs。Hemingway。Therewouldn\'tbeanyBillythere。 BeforeLorettahadbeenatSantaClaraaweek,shewasconvincedthatCaptainKitt\'sideawasagoodone。Inthefirstplace,thoughBillywouldn\'tbelieveit,shedidnotwanttomarryBilly。Andinthesecondplace,thoughCaptainKittwouldn\'tbelieveit,shedidnotwanttoleaveDaisy。BythetimeLorettahadbeenatSantaClaratwoweeks,shewasabsolutelycertainthatshedidnotwanttomarryBilly。ButshewasnotsosureaboutnotwantingtoleaveDaisy。NotthatshelovedDaisyless,butthatshe——haddoubts。 ThedayofLoretta\'sarrival,anebulousplanbeganshapingitselfinMrs。 Hemingway\'sbrain。TheseconddaysheremarkedtoJackHemingway,herhusband,thatLorettawassoinnocentayoungthingthatwereitnotforhersweetguilelessnessshewouldbepositivelystupid。Inproofofwhich,Mrs。Hemingwaytoldherhusbandseveralthingsthatmadehimchuckle。BythethirddayMrs。Hemingway\'splanhadtakenrecognizableform。Thenitwasthatshecomposedaletter。Ontheenvelopeshewrote:\"Mr。EdwardBashford,AthenianClub,SanFrancisco。\" \"DearNed,\"theletterbegan。Shehadoncebeenviolentlylovedbyhimforthreeweeksinherpre-maritaldays。ButshehadcovenantedherselftoJackHemingway,whohadpriorclaims,andherheartaswell;andNedBashfordhadphilosophicallynotbrokenhisheartoverit。Hemerelyaddedtheexperiencetoalargefundofsimilarlycollecteddataoutofwhichhemanufacturedphilosophy。ArtisticallyandtemperamentallyhewasaGreek—— atiredGreek。HewasfondofquotingfromNietzsche,intokenthathe,too,hadpassedthroughthelongsicknessthatfollowsupontheardentsearchfortruth;thathetoohademerged,tooexperienced,tooshrewd,tooprofound,everagaintobeafflictedbythemadnessofyouthsintheirloveoftruth。\"\'Toworshipappearance,\'\"heoftenquoted;\"\'tobelieveinforms,intones,inwords,inthewholeOlympusofappearance!\'\"Thisparticularexcerpthealwaysconcludedwith,\"\'ThoseGreeksweresuperficial——OUTOFPROFUNDITY!\'\" HewasafairlyyoungGreek,jadedandworn。Womenwerefaithlessandunveracious,heheld——atsuchtimesthathehadrelapsesanddescendedtopessimismfromhiswontedhighphilosophicalcalm。Hedidnotbelieveinthetruthofwomen;but,faithfultohisGermanmaster,hedidnotstripfromthemtheairygauzesthatveiledtheiruntruth。Hewascontenttoacceptthemasappearancesandtomakethebestofit。Hewassuperficial—— OUTOFPROFUNDITY。 \"Jacksaystobesuretosaytoyou,\'goodswimming,\'\"Mrs。Hemingwaywroteinherletter;\"andalso\'tobringyourfishingdudsalong。\'\"Mrs。 Hemingwaywroteotherthingsintheletter。Shetoldhimthatatlastshewaspreparedtoexhibittohimanabsolutelytrue,unsullied,andinnocentwoman。\"Amoreguileless,immaculatebudofwomanhoodneverblushedontheplanet,\"wasoneoftheseveralwaysinwhichshephrasedtheinducement。 Andtoherhusbandshesaidtriumphantly,\"IfIdon\'tmarryNedoffthistime——\"leavingunstatedtheterriblealternativethatshelackedeithervocabularytoexpressorimaginationtoconceive。 Contrarytoallherforebodings,LorettafoundthatshewasnotunhappyatSantaClara。Truly,Billywrotetohereveryday,buthisletterswerelessdistressingthanhispresence。Also,theordealofbeingawayfromDaisywasnotsosevereasshehadexpected。ForthefirsttimeinherlifeshewasnotlostineclipseintheblazeofDaisy\'sbrilliantandmaturepersonality。UndersuchfavourablecircumstancesLorettacamerapidlytothefront,whileMrs。Hemingwaymodestlyandshamelesslyretreatedintothebackground。 Lorettabegantodiscoverthatshewasnotapaleorbshiningbyreflection。Quiteunconsciouslyshebecameasmallcentreofthings。Whenshewasatthepiano,therewassomeonetoturnthepagesforherandtoexpresspreferencesforcertainsongs。Whenshedroppedherhandkerchief,therewassomeonetopickitup。Andtherewassomeonetoaccompanyherinramblingsandflowergatherings。Also,shelearnedtocastfliesinstillpoolsandbelowsavageriffles,andhownottoentanglesilklinesandgut-leaderswiththeshrubbery。 JackHemingwaydidnotcaretoteachbeginners,andfishedmuchbyhimself,ornotatall,thusgivingNedBashfordampletimeinwhichtoconsiderLorettaasanappearance。Assuch,shewasallthathisphilosophydemanded。Herblueeyeshadthedirectgazeofaboy,andoutofhisprofundityhedelightedinthemandforboretoshudderattheduplicityhisphilosophybadehimtobelievelurkedintheirdepths。Shehadthegraceofaslenderflower,thefragilityofcolourandlineoffinechina,inallofwhichhepleasuredgreatly,withoutthoughtoftheLifeForcepalpitatingbeneathandinspiteofBernardShaw——inwhomhebelieved。 Lorettaburgeoned。Sheswiftlydevelopedpersonality。ShediscoveredawillofherownandwishesofherownthatwerenoteverlastinglyentwinedwiththewillandthewishesofDaisy。ShewaspettedbyJackHemingway,spoiledbyAliceHemingway,anddevotedlyattendedbyNedBashford。Theyencouragedherwhimsandlaughedatherfollies,whileshedevelopedtheprettylittletyranniesthatarelatentinallprettyanddelicatewomen。 HerenvironmentactedasasoporificuponherancientdesirealwaystolivewithDaisy。ThisdesirenolongerproddedherasinthedaysofhercompanionshipwithBilly。ThemoreshesawofBilly,themorecertainshehadbeenthatshecouldnotliveawayfromDaisy。ThemoreshesawofNedBashford,themoresheforgotherpressingneedofDaisy。 NedBashfordlikewisedidsomeforgetting。Heconfusedsuperficialitywithprofundity,andentangledappearancewithrealityuntilheaccountedthemone。Lorettawasdifferentfromotherwomen。Therewasnomasqueradeabouther。Shewasreal。HesaidasmuchtoMrs。Hemingway,andmore,whoagreedwithhimandatthesametimecaughtherhusband\'seyeliddroopingdownforthemomentinanunmistakablewink。 ItwasatthistimethatLorettareceivedaletterfromBillythatwassomewhatdifferentfromhisothers。Inthemain,likeallhisletters,itwaspathological。Itwasalongrecitalofsymptomsandsufferings,hisnervousness,hissleeplessness,andthestateofhisheart。Thenfollowedreproaches,suchashehadnevermadebefore。Theyweresharpenoughtomakeherweep,andtrueenoughtoputtragedyintoherface。Thistragedyshecarrieddowntothebreakfasttable。ItmadeJackandMrs。Hemingwayspeculative,anditworriedNed。Theyglancedtohimforexplanation,butheshookhishead。 \"I\'llfindoutto-night,\"Mrs。Hemingwaysaidtoherhusband。 ButNedcaughtLorettaintheafternooninthebigliving-room。Shetriedtoturnaway。Hecaughtherhands,andshefacedhimwithwetlashesandtremblinglips。Helookedather,silentlyandkindly。Thelashesgrewwetter。 \"There,there,don\'tcry,littleone,\"hesaidsoothingly。 Heputhisarmprotectinglyaroundhershoulder。Andtohisshoulder,likeatiredchild,sheturnedherface。HethrilledinwaysunusualforaGreekwhohasrecoveredfromthelongsickness。 \"Oh,Ned,\"shesobbedonhisshoulder,\"ifyouonlyknewhowwickedIam!\" Hesmiledindulgently,andbreathedinagreatbreathfreightedwiththefragranceofherhair。Hethoughtofhisworld-experienceofwomen,anddrewanotherlongbreath。Thereseemedtoemanatefromhertheperfectsweetnessofachild——\"theauraofawhitesoul,\"wasthewayhephrasedittohimself。 Thenhenoticedthathersobswereincreasing。 \"What\'sthematter,littleone?\"heaskedpettinglyandalmostpaternally。 \"HasJackbeenbullyingyou?Orhasyourdearlybelovedsisterfailedtowrite?\" Shedidnotanswer,andhefeltthathereallymustkissherhair,thathecouldnotberesponsibleifthesituationcontinuedmuchlonger。 \"Tellme,\"hesaidgently,\"andwe\'llseewhatIcando。\" \"Ican\'t。Youwilldespiseme——Oh,Ned,Iamsoashamed!\" Helaughedincredulously,andlightlytouchedherhairwithhislips——solightlythatshedidnotknow。 \"Dearlittleone,letusforgetallaboutit,whateveritis。IwanttotellyouhowIlove——\" Sheutteredasharpcrythatwasalldelight,andthenmoaned—— \"Toolate!\" \"Toolate?\"heechoedinsurprise。 \"Oh,whydidI?WhydidI?\"shewasmoaning。 Hewasawareofaswiftchillathisheart。 \"What?\"heasked。 \"Oh,I……he……Billy。 \"Iamsuchawickedwoman,Ned。Iknowyouwillneverspeaktomeagain。\" \"This——er——thisBilly,\"hebeganhaltingly。\"Heisyourbrother?\" \"No……he……Ididn\'tknow。Iwassoyoung。Icouldnothelpit。 Oh,Ishallgomad!Ishallgomad!\" ItwasthenthatLorettafelthisshoulderandtheencirclingarmbecomelimp。Hedrewawayfromhergently,andgentlyhedepositedherinabigchair,wheresheburiedherfaceandsobbedafresh。Hetwistedhismoustachefiercely,thendrewupanotherchairandsatdown。 \"I——Idonotunderstand,\"hesaid。 \"Iamsounhappy,\"shewailed。 \"Whyunhappy?\" \"Because……he……hewantsmetomarryhim。\" Hisfaceclearedontheinstant,andheplacedahandsoothinglyonhers。 \"Thatshouldnotmakeanygirlunhappy,\"heremarkedsagely。\"Becauseyoudon\'tlovehimisnoreason——ofcourse,youdon\'tlovehim?\" Lorettashookherheadandshouldersinavigorousnegative。 \"What?\" Bashfordwantedtomakesure。 \"No,\"sheassertedexplosively。\"Idon\'tloveBilly!Idon\'twanttoloveBilly!\" \"Becauseyoudon\'tlovehim,\"Bashfordresumedwithconfidence,\"isnoreasonthatyoushouldbeunhappyjustbecausehehasproposedtoyou。\" Shesobbedagain,andfromthemidstofhersobsshecried—— \"That\'sthetrouble。IwishIdidlovehim。Oh,IwishIweredead!\" \"Now,mydearchild,youareworryingyourselfovertrifles。\"Hisotherhandcrossedoverafteritsmateandrestedonhers。\"Womendoiteveryday。Becauseyouhavechangedyourmindordidnotknowyourmind,becauseyouhave——touseanunnecessarilyharshword——jiltedaman——\" \"Jilted!\"Shehadraisedherheadandwaslookingathimwithtear-dimmedeyes。\"Oh,Ned,ifthatwereall!\" \"All?\"heaskedinahollowvoice,whilehishandsslowlyretreatedfromhers。Hewasabouttospeakfurther,thenremainedsilent。 \"ButIdon\'twanttomarryhim,\"Lorettabrokeforthprotestingly。 \"ThenIshouldn\'t,\"hecounselled。 \"ButIoughttomarryhim。\" \"OUGHTtomarryhim?\" Shenodded。 \"Thatisastrongword。\" \"Iknowitis,\"sheacquiesced,whileshestrovetocontrolhertremblinglips。Thenshespokemorecalmly。\"Iamawickedwoman,aterriblywickedwoman。NooneknowshowwickedIam——exceptBilly。\" Therewasapause。NedBashford\'sfacewasgrave,andhelookedqueerlyatLoretta。 \"He——Billyknows?\"heaskedfinally。 Areluctantnodandflamingcheekswasthereply。 Hedebatedwithhimselfforawhile,seeming,likeadiver,tobepreparinghimselffortheplunge。 \"Tellmeaboutit。\"Hespokeveryfirmly。\"Youmusttellmeallofit。\" \"Andwillyou——ever——forgiveme?\"sheaskedinafaint,smallvoice。 Hehesitated,drewalongbreath,andmadetheplunge。 \"Yes,\"hesaiddesperately。\"I\'llforgiveyou。Goahead。\" \"Therewasnoonetotellme,\"shebegan。\"Wewerewitheachothersomuch。Ididnotknowanythingoftheworld——then。\" Shepausedtomeditate。Bashfordwasbitinghislipimpatiently。 \"IfIhadonlyknown——\" Shepausedagain。 \"Yes,goon,\"heurged。 \"Weweretogetheralmosteveryevening。\" \"Billy?\"hedemanded,withasavagenessthatstartledher。 \"Yes,ofcourse,Billy。Wewerewitheachothersomuch……IfIhadonlyknown……Therewasnoonetotellme……Iwassoyoung——\" Herlipspartedasthoughtospeakfurther,andsheregardedhimanxiously。 \"Thescoundrel!\" WiththeexplosionNedBashfordwasonhisfeet,nolongeratiredGreek,butaviolentlyangryyoungman。 \"Billyisnotascoundrel;heisagoodman,\"Lorettadefended,withafirmnessthatsurprisedBashford。 \"Isupposeyou\'llbetellingmenextthatitwasallyourfault,\"hesaidsarcastically。 Shenodded。 \"What?\"heshouted。 \"Itwasallmyfault,\"shesaidsteadily。\"Ishouldneverhavelethim。I wastoblame。\" Bashfordceasedfromhispacingupanddown,andwhenhespoke,hisvoicewasresigned。 \"Allright,\"hesaid。\"Idon\'tblameyouintheleast,Loretta。Andyouhavebeenveryhonest。ButBillyisright,andyouarewrong。Youmustgetmarried。\" \"ToBilly?\"sheasked,inadim,far-awayvoice。 \"Yes,toBilly。I\'llseetoit。Wheredoeshelive?I\'llmakehim。\" \"ButIdon\'twanttomarryBilly!\"shecriedoutinalarm。\"Oh,Ned,youwon\'tdothat?\" \"Ishall,\"heansweredsternly。\"Youmust。AndBillymust。Doyouunderstand?\" Lorettaburiedherfaceinthecushionedchairback,andbrokeintoapassionatestormofsobs。 AllthatBashfordcouldmakeoutatfirst,ashelistened,was:\"ButI don\'twanttoleaveDaisy!Idon\'twanttoleaveDaisy!\" Hepacedgrimlybackandforth,thenstoppedcuriouslytolisten。 \"HowwasItoknow?——Boo——hoo,\"Lorettawascrying。\"Hedidn\'ttellme。 Nobodyelseeverkissedme。Ineverdreamedakisscouldbesoterrible……until,boo-hoo……untilhewrotetome。Ionlygottheletterthismorning。\" Hisfacebrightened。Itseemedasthoughlightwasdawningonhim。 \"Isthatwhatyou\'recryingabout?\" \"N——no。\" Hisheartsank。 \"Thenwhatareyoucryingabout?\"heaskedinahopelessvoice。 \"BecauseyousaidIhadtomarryBilly。AndIdon\'twanttomarryBilly。 Idon\'twanttoleaveDaisy。Idon\'tknowwhatIwant。IwishIweredead。\" Henervedhimselfforanothereffort。 \"Nowlookhere,Loretta,besensible。Whatisthisaboutkisses。Youhaven\'ttoldmeeverything?\" \"I——Idon\'twanttotellyoueverything。\" Shelookedathimbeseechinglyinthesilencethatfell。 \"MustI?\"shequaveredfinally。 \"Youmust,\"hesaidimperatively。\"Youmusttellmeeverything。\" \"Well,then……mustI?\" \"Youmust。\" \"He……I……we……\"shebeganflounderingly。Thenblurtedout,\"I lethim,andhekissedme。\" \"Goon,\"Bashfordcommandeddesperately。 \"That\'sall,\"sheanswered。 \"All?\"Therewasavastincredulityinhisvoice。 \"All?\"Inhervoicewasaninterrogationnolessvast。 \"Imean——er——nothingworse?\"Hewasoverwhelminglyawareofhisownawkwardness。 \"Worse?\"Shewasfranklypuzzled。\"Asthoughtherecouldbe!Billysaid—— \" \"Whendidhesayit?\"Bashforddemandedabruptly。 \"InhisletterIgotthismorning。Billysaidthatmy……our……ourkisseswereterribleifwedidn\'tgetmarried。\" Bashford\'sheadwasswimming。 \"WhatelsedidBillysay?\"heasked。 \"Hesaidthatwhenawomanallowedamantokissher,shealwaysmarriedhim——thatitwasterribleifshedidn\'t。Itwasthecustom,hesaid;andI sayitisabad,wickedcustom,andIdon\'tlikeit。IknowI\'mterrible,\" sheaddeddefiantly,\"butIcan\'thelpit。\" Bashfordabsent-mindedlybroughtoutacigarette。 \"DoyoumindifIsmoke?\"heasked,ashestruckamatch。 Thenhecametohimself。 \"Ibegyourpardon,\"hecried,flingingawaymatchandcigarette。\"Idon\'twanttosmoke。Ididn\'tmeanthatatall。WhatImeanis——\" HebentoverLoretta,caughtherhandsinhis,thensatonthearmofthechairandsoftlyputonearmaroundher。 \"Loretta,Iamafool。Imeanit。AndImeansomethingmore。Iwantyoutobemywife。\" Hewaitedanxiouslyinthepausethatfollowed。 \"Youmightanswerme,\"heurged。 \"Iwill……if——\" \"Yes,goon。Ifwhat?\" \"IfIdon\'thavetomarryBilly。\" \"Youcan\'tmarrybothofus,\"healmostshouted。 \"Anditisn\'tthecustom……what……whatBillysaid?\" \"No,itisn\'tthecustom。Now,Loretta,willyoumarryme?\" \"Don\'tbeangrywithme,\"shepouteddemurely。 Hegatheredherintohisarmsandkissedher。 \"Iwishitwerethecustom,\"shesaidinafaintvoice,fromthemidstoftheembrace,\"becausethenI\'dhavetomarryyou,Neddear……wouldn\'tI?\" JUSTMEAT Hestrolledtothecornerandglancedupanddowntheintersectingstreet,butsawnothingsavetheoasesoflightshedbythestreetlampsatthesuccessivecrossings。Thenhestrolledbackthewayhehadcome。Hewasashadowofaman,slidingnoiselesslyandwithoutunduemovementthroughthesemi-darkness。Alsohewasveryalert,likeawildanimalinthejungle,keenlyperceptiveandreceptive。Themovementofanotherinthedarknessabouthimwouldneedtohavebeenmoreshadowythanhetohaveescapedhim。 Inadditiontotherunningadvertisementofthestateofaffairscarriedtohimbyhissenses,hehadasubtlerperception,aFEEL,oftheatmospherearoundhim。Heknewthatthehouseinfrontofwhichhepausedforamoment,containedchildren。Yetbynowilledeffortofperceptiondidhehavethisknowledge。Forthatmatter,hewasnotevenawarethatheknew,sooccultwastheimpression。Yet,didamomentariseinwhichaction,inrelationtothathouse,wereimperative,hewouldhaveactedontheassumptionthatitcontainedchildren。Hewasnotawareofallthatheknewabouttheneighbourhood。 Inthesameway,heknewnothow,heknewthatnodangerthreatenedinthefootfallsthatcameupthecrossstreet。Beforehesawthewalker,heknewhimforabelatedpedestrianhurryinghome。Thewalkercameintoviewatthecrossinganddisappearedonupthestreet。Themanthatwatched,notedalightthatflaredupinthewindowofahouseonthecorner,andasitdieddownheknewitforanexpiringmatch。Thiswasconsciousidentificationoffamiliarphenomena,andthroughhismindflittedthethought,\"Wantedtoknowwhattime。\"Inanotherhouseoneroomwaslighted。Thelightburneddimlyandsteadily,andhehadthefeelthatitwasasick-room。 Hewasespeciallyinterestedinahouseacrossthestreetinthemiddleoftheblock。Tothishousehepaidmostattention。Nomatterwhatwayhelooked,norwhatwayhewalked,hislooksandhisstepsalwaysreturnedtoit。Exceptforanopenwindowabovetheporch,therewasnothingunusualaboutthehouse。Nothingcameinnorout。Nothinghappened。Therewerenolightedwindows,norhadlightsappearedanddisappearedinanyofthewindows。Yetitwasthecentralpointofhisconsideration。Heralliedtoiteachtimeafteradivinationofthestateoftheneighbourhood。 Despitehisfeelofthings,hewasnotconfident。Hewassupremelyconsciousoftheprecariousnessofhissituation。Thoughunperturbedbythefootfallsofthechancepedestrian,hewasaskeyedupandsensitiveandreadytobestartledasanytimorousdeer。Hewasawareofthepossibilityofotherintelligencesprowlingaboutinthedarkness—— intelligencessimilartohisowninmovement,perception,anddivination。 Fardownthestreethecaughtaglimpseofsomethingthatmoved。Andheknewitwasnolatehome-goer,butmenaceanddanger。Hewhistledtwicetothehouseacrossthestreet,thenfadedawayshadow-liketothecornerandaroundthecorner。Herehepausedandlookedabouthimcarefully。 Reassured,hepeeredbackaroundthecornerandstudiedtheobjectthatmovedandthatwascomingnearer。Hehaddivinedaright。Itwasapoliceman。 Themanwentdownthecrossstreettothenextcorner,fromtheshelterofwhichhewatchedthecornerhehadjustleft。Hesawthepolicemanpassby,goingstraightonupthestreet。Heparalleledthepoliceman\'scourse,andfromthenextcorneragainwatchedhimgoby;thenhereturnedthewayhehadcome。Hewhistledoncetothehouseacrossthestreet,andafteratimewhistledonceagain。Therewasreassuranceinthewhistle,justastherehadbeenwarninginthepreviousdoublewhistle。 Hesawadarkbulkoutlineitselfontheroofoftheporchandslowlydescendapillar。Thenitcamedownthesteps,passedthroughthesmallirongate,andwentdownthesidewalk,takingontheformofaman。Hethatwatchedkeptonhisownsideofthestreetandmovedonabreasttothecorner,wherehecrossedoverandjoinedtheother。Hewasquitesmallalongsidethemanheaccosted。 \"How\'dyoumakeout,Matt?\"heasked。 Theothergruntedindistinctly,andwalkedoninsilenceafewsteps。 \"IreckonIlandedthegoods,\"hesaid。 Jimchuckledinthedarkness,andwaitedforfurtherinformation。Theblockspassedbyundertheirfeet,andhegrewimpatient。 \"Well,howaboutthemgoods?\"heasked。\"Whatkindofahauldidyoumake,anyway?\" \"Iwastoobusytofiggeritout,butit\'sfat。Icantellyouthatmuch,Jim,it\'sfat。Idon\'tdasttothinkhowfatitis。Waittillwegettotheroom。\" Jimlookedathimkeenlyunderthestreetlampofthenextcrossing,andsawthathisfacewasatriflegrimandthathecarriedhisleftarmpeculiarly。 \"What\'sthematterwithyourarm?\"hedemanded。 \"Thelittlecussbitme。HopeIdon\'tgethydrophoby。Folksgetshydrophobyfrommanbitesometimes,don\'tthey?\" \"Gaveyoufight,eh?\"Jimaskedencouragingly。 Theothergrunted。 \"You\'reharder\'nhelltogetinformationfrom,\"Jimburstoutirritably。 \"Tellusaboutit。Youain\'tgoin\'tolosemoneyjusta-tellin\'aguy。\" \"IguessIchokedhimsome,\"cametheanswer。Then,bywayofexplanation,\"Hewokeuponme。\" \"Youdiditneat。Ineverheardasound。\" \"Jim,\"theothersaidwithseriousness,\"it\'sahangin\'matter。Ifixed\'m。Ihadto。Hewokeuponme。Youan\'me\'sgottodosomelayin\'lowforaspell。\" Jimgavealowwhistleofcomprehension。 \"Didyouhearmewhistle?\"heaskedsuddenly。 \"Sure。Iwasalldone。Iwasjustcomin\'out。\" \"Itwasabull。Buthewasn\'tonalittlebit。Wentrightbyan\'kepta- paddin\'thehoofoutasight。ThenIcomebackan\'gaveyouthewhistle。 Whatmadeyoutakesolongafterthat?\" \"Iwaswaitin\'tomakesure,\"Mattexplained。\"IwasmightygladwhenI heardyouwhistleagain。It\'shardworkwaitin\'。Ijustsattherean\' thoughtan\'thought……oh,allkinds\'ofthings。It\'sremarkablewhatafellow\'llthinkabout。Andthentherewasadarncatthatkeptmovin\' aroundthehouseall\'botherin\'mewithitsnoises。\" \"An\'it\'sfat!\"Jimexclaimedirrelevantlyandwithjoy。 \"I\'msuretellin\'you,Jim,it\'sfat。I\'mplum\'anxiousforanotherlookat\'em。\" Unconsciouslythetwomenquickenedtheirpace。Yettheydidnotrelaxfromtheircaution。Twicetheychangedtheircourseinordertoavoidpolicemen,andtheymadeverysurethattheywerenotobservedwhentheydivedintothedarkhallwayofacheaproominghousedowntown。 Notuntiltheyhadgainedtheirownroomonthetopfloor,didtheyscratchamatch。WhileJimlightedalamp,Mattlockedthedoorandthrewtheboltsintoplace。Asheturned,henoticedthathispartnerwaswaitingexpectantly。Mattsmiledtohimselfattheother\'seagerness。 \"Themsearch-lightsisallright,\"hesaid,drawingforthasmallpocketelectriclampandexaminingit。\"Butwegottogetanewbattery。It\'srunnin\'prettyweak。Ithoughtonceortwiceit\'dleavemeinthedark。 Funnyarrangementsinthathouse。Ineargotlost。Hisroomwasontheleft,an\'thatfooledmesome。\" \"Itoldyouitwasontheleft,\"Jiminterrupted。 \"Youtoldmeitwasontheright,\"Mattwenton。\"IguessIknowwhatyoutoldme,an\'there\'sthemapyoudrew。\" Fumblinginhisvestpocket,hedrewoutafoldedslipofpaper。Asheunfoldedit,Jimbentoverandlooked。 \"Ididmakeamistake,\"heconfessed。 \"Yousuredid。Itgotmeguessin\'someforawhile。\" \"Butitdon\'tmatternow,\"Jimcried。\"Let\'sseewhatyougot。\" \"Itdoesmatter,\"Mattretorted。\"Itmattersalot……tome。I\'vegottorunalltherisk。Iputmyheadinthetrapwhileyoustayonthestreet。Yougottogetontoyourselfan\'bemorecareful。Allright,I\'llshowyou。\" Hedippedlooselyintohistrouserspocketandbroughtoutahandfulofsmalldiamonds。Hespilledthemoutinablazingstreamonthegreasytable。Jimletoutagreatoath。 \"That\'snothing,\"Mattsaidwithtriumphantcomplacence。\"Iain\'tbegunyet。\" Fromonepocketafteranotherhecontinuedbringingforththespoil。Thereweremanydiamondswrappedinchamoisskinthatwerelargerthanthoseinthefirsthandful。Fromonepockethebroughtoutahandfulofverysmallcutgems。 \"Sundust,\"heremarked,ashespilledthemonthetableinaspacebythemselves。 Jimexaminedthem。 \"Justthesame,theyretailforacoupleofdollarseach,\"hesaid。\"Isthatall?\" \"Ain\'titenough?\"theotherdemandedinanaggrievedtone。 \"Sureitis,\"Jimansweredwithunqualifiedapproval。\"Better\'nI expected。Iwouldn\'ttakeacentlessthantenthousan\'forthebunch。\" \"Tenthousan\',\"Mattsneered。\"They\'reworthtwic\'tthat,an\'Idon\'tknowanythingaboutjoolery,either。Lookatthatbigboy!\" Hepickeditoutfromthesparklingheapandhelditneartothelampwiththeairofanexpert,weighingandjudging。 \"Worthathousan\'allbyitslonely,\"wasJim\'squickerjudgment。 \"Athousan\'yourgrandmother,\"wasMatt\'sscornfulrejoinder。\"Youcouldn\'tbuyitforthree。\" \"Wakemeup!I\'mdreamin\'!\"ThesparkleofthegemswasinJim\'seyes,andhebegansortingoutthelargerdiamondsandexaminingthem。\"We\'rerichmen,Matt——we\'llberegularswells。\" \"It\'lltakeyearstogetridof\'em,\"wasMatt\'smorepracticalthought。 \"Butthinkhowwe\'lllive!Nothin\'todobutspendthemoneyan\'goongettin\'ridofem。\" Matt\'seyeswerebeginningtosparkle,thoughsombrely,ashisphlegmaticnaturewokeup。 \"ItoldyouIdidn\'tdastthinkhowfatitwas,\"hemurmuredinalowvoice。 \"Whatakillin\'!Whatakillin\'!\"wastheother\'smoreecstaticutterance。 \"Ialmostforgot,\"Mattsaid,thrustinghishandintohisinsidecoatpocket。 Astringoflargepearlsemergedfromwrappingsoftissuepaperandchamoisskin。Jimscarcelyglancedatthem。 \"They\'reworthmoney,\"hesaid,andreturnedtothediamonds。 Asilencefellonthetwomen。Jimplayedwiththegems,runningthemthroughhisfingers,sortingthemintopiles,andspreadingthemoutflatandwide。Hewasaslender,weazenedman,nervous,irritable,high-strung,andanaemic——atypicalchildofthegutter,withunbeautifultwistedfeatures,small-eyed,withfaceandmouthperpetuallyandfeverishlyhungry,brutishinacat-likeway,stampedtothecorewithdegeneracy。 Mattdidnotfingerthediamonds。Hesatwithchinonhandsandelbowsontable,blinkingheavilyattheblazingarray。Hewasineverywayacontrasttotheother。Nocityhadbredhim。Hewasheavy-muscledandhairy,gorilla-likeinstrengthandaspect。Forhimtherewasnounseenworld。Hiseyeswerefullandwideapart,andthereseemedinthemacertainboldbrotherliness。Theyinspiredconfidence。Butacloserinspectionwouldhaveshownthathiseyeswerejustatrifletoofull,justashadetoowideapart。Heexceeded,spilledoverthelimitsofnormality,andhisfeaturestoldliesaboutthemanbeneath。 \"Thebunchisworthfiftythousan\',\"Jimremarkedsuddenly。 \"Ahundredthousan\',\"Mattsaid。 Thesilencereturnedandenduredalongtime,tobebrokenagainbyJim。 \"Whatinhellwashedoin\'with\'emallatthehouse?——that\'swhatIwanttoknow。I\'da-thoughthe\'dkept\'eminthesafedownatthestore。\" Matthadjustbeenconsideringthevisionofthethrottledmanashehadlastlookeduponhiminthedimlightoftheelectriclantern;buthedidnotstartatthementionofhim。 \"There\'snotellin\',\"heanswered。\"Hemighta-bengettin\'readytochuckhispardner。Hemighta-pulledoutinthemornin\'forpartsunknown,ifwehadn\'thappenedalong。Iguessthere\'sjustasmanythievesamonghonestmenasthereisamongthieves。Youreadaboutsuchthingsinthepapers,Jim。Pardnersisalwaysknifin\'eachother。\" Aqueer,nervouslookcameintotheother\'seyes。Mattdidnotbetraythathenotedit,thoughhesaid