\"Oh，dear，dear，dear!Becausethatiswhereeverydaughtergoesintrouble。Ishould——she_has。_Fancyyounotseeingthat——why，FannyDoverwouldhavetoldyouthatmuchinamoment。Butnowyouwillhavetothank_my_motherforteachingmeAttention，theparentofMemory。Pray，sir，whowerethewitnessestothatabominablemarriageofhers?\"
\"Iremembertwo，BaronHompesch——\"
\"No，CountHompesch。\"
\"AndCountMeurice。\"
\"Viscount。What，haveyouforgottenHerrFormes，FrauleinGraafe，ZugtheCapellmeister，andherverymother?Comenow，whosedaughterisshe?\"
\"Iforget，I\'msure。\"
\"WalterFerrisandEvaKlosking，ofZutzig，inDenmark。Pack——startforCopenhagen。Consultanordnancemapthere。FindoutZutzig。GotoZutzig，andyouhavegother。Itissomeholeinawilderness，andshecan\'tescape。\"
\"Youcleverlittleangel!I\'llbethereinthreedays。DoyoureallythinkIshallsucceed?\"
\"Yourownfaultifyoudon\'t。Shehasrunintoa_cul-de-sac_throughbeingtooclever；and，besides，womensometimesrunawayjusttobecaught，andhideonpurposetobefound。Ishouldnotwonderifshehassaidtoherself，\'Hewillfindmeifhelovesmesovery，verymuch——I\'lltryhim。\'\"
\"Notawordmore，angelicfox，\"saidVizard；\"I\'mofftoZutzig。\"
Hewentoutonfire。Sheopenedthewindowandscreechedafterhim，\"Everythingisfairafterherbehaviortome。Takeherabookofthosespiritualsongssheissofondof。\'Johnnycomesmarchinghome，\'isworththelot，Ireckon。\"
AwaywentVizard；foundCopenhagenwithease；Zutzigwithdifficulty，beingasmallvillage。Butoncethere，hesoonfoundthefarmhouseofEvaKlosking。Hedroveuptothedoor。ADanishlaborercameoutfromthestabledirectly；andabuxomgirl，withpalegoldenhair，openedthedoor。Thesetwoseizedhisluggage，andconveyeditintothehouse，andthehiredvehicletothestable。Vizardthoughtitmustbeaninn。
Thegirlbubbledmelodioussounds，andranoffandbroughtasweet，venerablename。VizardrecognizedEvaKloskingatonce。Theoldladysaid，\"Fewstrangerscomehere——areyounotEnglish?\"
\"Yes，madam。\"
\"ItisMr。Vizard——isitnot?\"
\"Yes，madam。\"
\"Ah，sir，mydaughterwillwelcomeyou，butnotmoreheartilythanIdo。
Mychildhastoldmeallsheowestoyou\"——theninDanish，\"Godblessthehouryoucomeunderthisroof。\"
Vizard\'sheartbeattumultuously，wonderinghowInaKloskingwouldreceivehim。Theservanthadtoldheratallstrangerwascome。Sheknewinamomentwhoitwas；soshehadtheadvantageofbeingprepared。
Shecametohim，hercheeksdyedwithblushes，andgavehimbothhands。
\"Youhere!\"saidshe；\"oh，happyday!Mother，hemusthavethesouthchamber。Iwillgoandprepareitforhim。Tecla!——Tecla!\"——andshewasallhostess。Shecommittedhimtohermother，whilesheandtheservantwentupstairs。
Hefeltdiscomfitedalittle。Hewantedtoknow，allinamoment，whethershewouldlovehim。
However，Danishhospitalityhasitsgoodside。Hesoonfoundouthemightlivetherestofhisdaysthereifhechose。
Hesoongotheralone，andsaid，\"YouknewIshouldfindyou，cruelone。\"
\"HowcouldIdreamofsuchathing?\"saidshe，blushing。
\"Oh，Loveisadetective。Yousaidtoyourself，\'IfhelovesmeasI
oughttobeloved，hewillsearchEuropeforme；buthewillfindme。\'\"
\"Oh，thenitwasnottobeatpeaceandrestonmymother\'sbosomIcamehere；itwastogiveyouthetroubleofrunningafterme。Oh，fie!\"
\"Youareright。Iamavainfool。\"
\"No，thatyouarenot。Afterall，howdoIknowallthatwasinmyheart?
(Ahem!)Besureofthis，youareverywelcome。Imustgoandseeaboutyourdinner。\"
InthatDanishfarmhouselifewasveryprimitive。EvaKlosking，andbothherdaughters，helpedthetwofemaleservants，ordirectedthem，ineverydepartment。SoIna，whowasonherdefense，hadmanyexcusesforescapingVizard，whenhepressedhertoohotly。Butatlastshewasobligedtosay，\"Oh，pray，myfriend——weareinDenmark:herewidowsareexpectedtobediscreet。\"
\"ButthatisnoreasonwhytheEnglishfellowswhoadorethemshouldbediscreet。\"
\"Perhapsnot:butthentheDanishladyrunsaway。\"
Whichshedid。
But，afterthebustleofthefirstday，hehadsomanyopportunities。Hewalkedwithher，satwithherwhilesheworked，andhungoverher，entranced，whileshesung。HeproducedthebookfromVizardCourtwithoutwarning，andshescreamedwithdelightatsightofit，andcaughthishandinbothhersandkissedit。Shereveledinthosesweetstrainswhichhadcomfortedherinaffliction:andoh，theeyessheturnedonhimaftersinginganysonginthisparticularbook!Thosetenderglancesthrilledhimtotheverymarrow。
Totellthehonesttruth，hisarrivalwasagodsendtoInaKlosking。Whenshefirstcamehometohernativeplace，andlaidherheadonhermother\'sbosom，shewasinElysium。Thehouse，thewoodfires，thecooingdoves，thebleatingcalves，theprimitivelife，therecollectionsofchildhood——allwerebalmtoher，andshefeltlikeendingherdaysthere。
But，asthedaysrolledon，cameasenseofmonotonyandexcessivetranquillity。Shewasonthevergeof_ennui_whenVizardbrokeinuponher。
Fromthatmomenttherewasnostagnation。Hemadelifeverypleasanttoher；onlyherdelicacytookthealarmathisopendeclarations；shethoughtthemsopremature。
Atlasthesaidtoher，oneday，\"IbegintofearyouwillneverlovemeasIloveyou。\"
\"Whoknows?\"saidshe。\"Timeworkswonders。\"
\"Iwonder，\"saidhe，\"whetheryouwillevermarryanyotherman?\"
Inawasshockedatthat。\"Oh，myfriend，howcouldI——unless，\"saidshe，withaslyside-glance，\"youconsented。\"
\"Consent?I\'dmassacrehim。\"
Inaturnedtowardhim。\"Youaskedmyhandatatimewhenyouthoughtme——Idon\'tknowwhatyouthought——thatisathingnowomancouldforget。
Andnowyouhavecomeallthiswayforme。Iamyours，ifyoucanwaitforme。\"
Hecaughtherinhisarms。Shedisengagedherself，gently，andherhandrestedanunnecessarymomentonhisshoulder。\"Isthathowyouunderstand\'waiting?\'\"saidshe，withablush，butanindulgentsmile。
\"Whatistheusewaiting?\"
\"Itisamatterofpropriety。\"
\"Howlongarewetowait?\"
\"Onlyafewmonths。Myfriend，itislikeaboytobetooimpatient。
Alas!wouldyoumarrymeinmywidow\'scap?\"
\"OfcourseIwould。Now，Ina，love，awidowwhohasbeentwoyearsseparatedfromherhusband!\"
\"Certainly，thatmakesadifference——inone\'sownmind。Butonemustrespecttheopinionoftheworld。Dearfriend，itisofyouIthink，thoughIspeakofmyself。\"
\"Youareanangel。Takeyourowntime。Afterall，whatdoesitmatter?I
don\'tleaveZutzigwithoutyou。\"
Ina\'spinktintandsparklingeyesbetrayedanythingbuthorroratthatinsaneresolution。However，shefeltitherdutytosaythatitwasunfortunatesheshouldalwaysbethepersontodistracthimfromhishomeduties。
\"Oh，nevermindthem，\"saidthissingle-heartedlover。\"IhaveappointedMissGaleviceroy。\"
However，onedayhehadaletterfromZoe，tellinghimthatLordUxmoorwasnowurginghertonametheday；butshehaddeclinedtodothat，notknowingwhenitmightsuithimtobeatVizardCourt。\"But，dearest，\"
saidshe，\"mind，youarenottohurryhomeforme。IamveryhappyasI
am，andIhopeyouwillsoonbeashappy，love。Sheisanoblewoman。\"
ThelatterpartofthislettertemptedVizardtoshowittoIna。Hesoonfoundhismistake。Shekissedit，andorderedhimoff。Heremonstrated。
Sheputon，forthefirsttimeinDenmark，hermarblelook，andsaid，\"Youwilllessenmyesteem，ifyouarecrueltoyoursister。Lethernamethewedding-dayatonce；andyoumustbetheretogiveheraway，andblessherunion，withabrother\'slove。\"
Hesubmitted，butalittlesullenly，andsaiditwasveryhard。
Hewrotetohissister，accordingly，andshenamedtheday，andVizardsettledtostartforhome，andbeintime。
Astotheproprieties，hehadinstructedMissMaitlandandFannyDover，andgiventhemandLaGale_carteblanche。_Itwastobeamagnificentwedding。
Thisbeingexcitement，FannyDoverwasinparadise。Moreover，arosy-cheekedcuratehadtakentheplaceofthevenerablevicar，andMissDover\'sthreattoflirtoutthestigmaofanunwasexecutedwithpromptitude，zeal，pertinacity，andthedexteritythatcomesofpractice。
WhenthedaycameforhisleavingZutzig，Vizardwasdejected。\"Whoknowswhenwemaymeetagain?\"saidhe。
Inaconsoledhim。\"Donotbesad，dearfriend。Youaredoingyourduty；
andasyoudoitpartlytopleaseme，Ioughttotryandrewardyou；
oughtInot?\"Andshegavehimastrangelook。
\"Iadviseyounottopressthatquestion，\"saidhe。
Attheveryhourofparting，Ina\'seyesweremoistwithtenderness，buttherewasasmileonherfaceveryexpressive；yethecouldnotmakeoutwhatitmeant。Shedidnotcry。Hethoughtthathard。Itwashisopinionthatwomencouldalwayscry。Shemighthavedonetheusualthingjusttogratifyhim。
Hereachedhomeingoodtime:andplayedthe_grandseigneur_——nobodycoulddoitbetterwhendriventoit——todohonortohissister。Shewasapeerlessbride:shestoodsuperiorwithebonlocksandcoalblackeyes，encircledbysixbridemaids——allpickedblondes。Thebevy，withthatgloriousfigureinthemiddle，seemedonegloriousandrareflower。
Afterthewedding，thebreakfast；andthenthetravelingcarriage；thefourliveriedpostilionsbedeckedwithfavors。
ButthebrideweptonVizard\'sneck；andalightseemedtoleavethehousewhenshewasgone。Thecarriageskeptdrivingawayoneafteranothertillfouro\'clock:andthenVizardsatdisconsolateinhisstudy，andfeltverylonely。
Yetathingnobiggerthanaleafsufficedtodriveawaythissombermood，apieceofamber-coloredpaperscribbledonwithapencil:atelegramfromAshmead:\"Goodnews:lostsheepturnedup。IsnowwithhermotheratClaridge\'sHotel。\"
ThenVizardwasinraptures。NowheunderstoodIna\'scomposure，andthehalfslylookshehadgivenhim，andherdryeyesatparting，andotherthings。HetoreuptoLondondirectly，withatelegramflyingahead:
burstinuponher，andhadherinhisarmsinamoment，beforehermother:shefencednolonger，butownedhehadgainedherlove，ashehaddeserveditineveryway。
SheconsentedtobemarriedthatweekinLondon:onlysheaskedforaContinentaltourbeforeenteringVizardCourtashiswife；butshedidnotstipulateevenforthat——sheonlyaskeditsubmissively，asonewhosedutyitnowwastoobey，notdictate。
TheyweremarriedinSt。George\'sChurchveryquietly，byspeciallicense。Thentheysawhermotheroff，andcrossedtoCalais。TheyspenttwohappymonthstogetherontheContinent，andreturnedtoLondon。
ButVizardwastooold-fashioned，andtooproudofhiswife，tosneakintoVizardCourtwithher。Hedidnotmakeitacountymatter；buthegavethevillagesucha_fete_ashadnotbeenseenformanyaday。ThepreparationswereintrustedtoMr。Ashmead，atIna\'srequest。\"Hewillbesuretomakeittheatrical，\"shesaid；\"butperhapsthesimplevillagerswilladmirethat，anditwillamuseyouandme，love:andthepoordearoldThingwillbeinhisglory——Ihopehewillnotdrinktoomuch。\"
Ashmeadwasindeedinhisglory。NothinghadbeenseeninaplaythathedidnotelectrifyIslipwith，andthesurroundingvillages。Hepastedlargepostersonwallsandbarndoors，andhissmallbillscurledroundthepatriarchsoftheforestandtheroadsidetrees，andblisteredthegateposts。
Thedaycame。Asoapypole，withalegofmuttononhighforthesuccessfulclimber。Racesinsacks。Shortblindfoldraceswithwheelbarrows。Pigwithagreasytail，tobewonbyhimwhocouldcatchhimandshoulderhim，withouttouchinganyotherpartofhim；bowlsoftreaclefortheboystoduckheadsinandfishoutcoins；skittles，ninepins，AuntSally，etc。，etc。，etc。
ButwhatastonishedthevillagersmostwasaMay-pole，withlongribbons，aboutwhichballetgirls，undisguisedasHighlanders，danced，andwoundandunwoundtheparty-coloredstreamers，tothemerryfiddle，andthendancedreelsuponaplatform，thenreturnedtotheirlittletent:butoutagainanddancedhornpipesundisguisedasJackyTars。
Beerflowedfromasturdyregimentofbarrels。\"TheCourt\"kitchenandthevillagebakehousekeptpouringforthmeats，baked，boiled，androast；
therewasapileofloaveslikeahaystack；andtheyroastedanoxwholeontheGreen；and，whentheyfoundtheywereburninghimraw，theyfetchedthebutcher，likesensiblefellows，anddismemberedthegiant，andsoroastedhimreasonably。
Inthemidstoftherevelingandfeasting，VizardandMrs。VizardweredrivenintoIslipvillageinthefamilycoach，withfourhorsesstreamingwithribbons。
TheydroveroundtheGreen，bowingandsmilinginanswertotheacclamationsandblessingsofthepoor，andthentoVizardCourt。Thegreatdoorsflewopen。Theservants，maleandfemale，linedthehallonbothsides，andreceivedherbowingandcourtesyinglow，ontheveryspotwhereshehadnearlymetherdeath；herhusbandtookherhandandconductedherinstatetoherownapartment。
Itwasopenhousetoallthatjoyfulday，andatnightmagnificentfireworksonthesweep，seenfromthedrawing-roombyMrs。Vizard，MissMaitland，MissGale，MissDover，andtherosy-cheekedcurate，whomshehadtiedtoherapron-strings。
Attwointhemorning，Mr。HarrisshowedMr。Ashmeadtohiscouch。Bothgentlemenwentupstairsalittlegraverthananyofourmodernjudges，andfirmasarock；buttheirfirmnessresembledthatofaroofratherthanawall；forthesedignitiesastheywentmadeoneinvertedV——so，A。
Itistimethe\"Woman-hater\"drewtoaclose，forthewoman-haterisspoiled。Hebeginssarcasticspeeches，fromforceofhabit，butstopsshortinthemiddle。Heisaveryhappyman，andowesittoawoman，andknowsit。Headoresher；andtolovewellistobehappy。But，besidesthat，shewatchesoverhishappinessandhisgoodwiththatunobtrusivebutminutevigilancewhichbelongstohersex，andisoftenmisapplied，butnotsoveryoftenascynicssay。Eventhehonestfriendshipbetweenhimandtheremarkablewomanhecallshis\"viragos\"giveshimmanyapleasanthour。Heisstillahumorist，thoughcuredofhisflingatthefairsex。Hislasttolerablehitwasatthemonosyllabicnamesoftheimmortalcomposershiswifehaddisinterredinhislibrary。SayshetoparsonDenison，hotfromOxford，\"TheyremindmeoftheOxfordpoetsinthelastcentury:
\"AlmanovemcelebresgenuitRhedyeinapoetas。Bubb，Stubb，Grubb，Crabbe，Trappe。Brome，Carey，Tickell，Evans。\"
AsforInaVizard，LaKloskingnolonger，shehassteppedintohernewplacewithhernativedignity，seemlinessandcomposure。Atfirst，afewcountyladiesputtheirlittleheadstogether，andpreparedtogivethemselvesairs；butthebeauty，dignity，andenchantinggraceofMrs。
Vizardsweptthislittlefactionawaylikesmalldust。Herperfectcourtesy，hermildbutdeepdislikeofallfeminineback-biting，herdeadsilenceabouttheabsent，exceptwhenshecanspeakkindly——theseraretraitshaveforced，bydegrees，theesteemandconfidenceofherownsex。
Asforthemen，theyacceptedheratoncewithenthusiasm。SheandLadyUxmooraretheacknowledgedbellesofthecounty。LadyUxmoor\'sfaceisthemostadmired；butMrs。Vizardcomesnext，andhersatinshoulders，statuesquebustandarms，andexquisitehand，turnthescalewithsome。
Butwhenshespeaks，shecharms；andwhenshesings，allcompetitiondies。
Sheisfaithfultomusic，andespeciallytosacredmusic。Sheisnotveryfondofsingingatparties，andsometimesgivesoffensebydeclining。
Musicsetsfoolstalking，becauseitexcitesthem，andthentheirfollycomesoutbytheroadnaturehasprovided。ButwhenMrs。Vizardhastosinginonekey，andpeopletalkinfiveotherkeys，thatgivesthisartistsuchphysicalpainthatsheoftendeclines，merelytoescapeit。
Itdoesnotmuchmortifyhervanity，shehassolittle。
Shealwayssingsinchurch，andsingsout，too，whensheisthere；andplaystheharmonium。Shetrainsthevillagers——girls，boysandadults——withuntiringgoodhumorandpatience。
Amongherpupilsaretwofinevoices——TomWilder，agrandbass，andtherosy-cheekedcurate，agreaterraritystill，agenuinecounter-tenor。
Thesetwocanbothreadmusictolerably；butthecurateusedtosingeverything，howeverfullofjoy，withapatheticwhine，forwhichVizardchaffedhiminvain；butMrs。Vizardpersuadedhimoutofit，whereargumentandsatirefailed。
PeoplecomefarandneartohearthehymnsatIslipChurch，sunginfullharmony——trebles，tenors，counter-tenor，andbass。
Atrait——sheallowsnothingtobesunginchurchunrehearsed。TherehearsalsareonSaturdaynight，andnevershirked，suchistherespectfor\"OurDame。\"Tobesure，\"OurDame\"fillsthestomachsandwetsthewhistlesofherfaithfulchoironSaturdaynights。
OnSundaynightsthereareperformancesofsacredmusicinthegreatdining-hall。Butthesearerathermoreambitiousthanthoseinthevillagechurch。Theperformersmeetonthathappyfootingofcamaraderiethefineartscreate，thesuperiorrespectshowntoMrs。Vizardbeingmainlypaidtoherasthegreatermusician。Theyattackanthemsandservices；andatrio，bytheparson，theblacksmith，and\"OurDame，\"isreallyanextraordinarytreat，owingtothegreatbeautyofthevoices。
Itisalsopiquanttohearthefemalesingerconstantlysix，andoftenten，notesbelowthemalecounter-tenor；butthencomesWilderwithhisdiapason，andtheharmonyisnoble；themoresothatMrs。Vizardrehearsesherpupilsintheswell——afiguretoolittlepracticedinmusic，andnowherecarriedoutasshedoesit。
OnenighttheorganistofBarfordwasthere。TheysungKent\'sserviceinF，andMrs。Vizardstilladmiredit。Sheandtheparsonswelledintheduet，\"TobeaLighttolightentheGentiles，\"etc。Organistapprovedtheexecution，butsaidthecompositionwasameagerthing，quiteoutofdate。\"Wehavemuchfinerthingsnowbylearnedmenoftheday。\"
\"Ah，\"saidshe，\"bringmeone。\"
So，nextSunday，hebroughtheralearnedcomposition，andplayedittoher，preliminarytotheirsingingit。Butshedeclineditonthespot。
\"What!\"saidshe。\"Mr。X。，wouldyoucomparethismeaninglessstuffwithKentinF?Why，inKent，thedominantsentimentofeachcompositionisadmirablypreserved。His\'Magnificat\'isloftyjubilation，withafree，onwardrush。His\'Dimittis\'isdivinereposeafterlife\'sfever。Butthispoorpedant\'s\'Magnificat\'beginswithamerecrash，andthenfallsintothepathetic——anexcellentthinginitsplace，butnotinasongoftriumph。Astohis\'Dimittis，\'itsimplydefiesthewords。ThisisnoChristiansunset。ItisnotgoodoldSimeongentlydecliningtohisrest，contenttoclosethoseeyeswhichhadseentheworld\'ssalvation。Thisisatempest，andallthewindowsrattling，andthegreatNapoleondying，amidthefuryoftheelements，with\'te\'ted\'arme\'e!\'onhisdyinglips，and\'battle\'inhisexpiringsoul。No，sir；ifthelearnedEnglishmenofthisdaycandonothingnearerthemarkthanDOLEFULMAGNIFICATSandSTORMYNUNCDIMITTISES，IshallstandfaithfultopoordeadKent，andhisfellows——theyweremysolaceinsicknessandsoretrouble。\"
Inaccordancewiththeseviewsofvocalmusic，anddesiroustoexpanditssphere，Mrs。Vizardhasjustofferedhandsomeprizesinthecountyforthebestservice，inwhichthedominantsentimentofthewordsshallbeaswellpreservedasinKent\'sdespisedservice；andanotherprizetowhoevercansetanyfamousshortsecularpoem，orpoeticalpassage(notinballadmeter)，togoodandappropriatemusic。
Thishaselicitedseveralpieces。ThecomposershavetriedtheirhandsonDryden\'sOde；onthemeetingofHectorandAndromache(Pope\'s\"Homer\")；
ontwoshortpoemsofTennyson；etc。，etc。
Butitisonlythebeginningofagoodthing。Thepieces，areunderconsideration。Vizardsaysthecompetitorsaretrifiers。_He_shallsetMr。Arnold\'sversionof\"HeroandLeander\"totheharp，andsingithimself。This，heintimates，willsilencecompetitionandproveanera。I
thinksotoo，ifhismusicshould_happen_toequalthelinesinvalue。
ButIhardlythinkitwill，becausethesaidVizard，thoughhehastasteandear，doesnotknowonenotefromanother。SoIhope\"HeroandLeander\"willfallintoablerhands；andinanycase，ItrustMrs。Vizardwillsucceedinherworthydesiretoenlarge，verygreatly，thesphereandthenobilityofvocalmusic。Itisadesireworthyofthisremarkablecharacter，ofwhomInowtakemyleavewithregret。
ImustownthatregretiscausedinpartbymyfearthatImaynothavedoneherallthejusticeIdesired。
Ihavelongfeltandregrettedthatmanyablefemalewritersaredoingmuchtoperpetuatethepettyvicesofasex，which，afterall，isatpresentbuthalfeducated，bydevotingthreethickvolumestosuchemptywomenasBiography，thoughalowerartthanFiction，wouldnotwastethreepageson。Theypleadtruthandfidelitytonature。\"Wewritetheaveragewoman，fortheaveragewomantoread，\"saythey。Buttheyarenotconsistent；fortheaveragewomanisunderfivefeet，andratherugly。
Nowthesepaltrywomenareallbeautiful——[Greek]，asHomerhathit。
FictionhasjustasmuchrighttoselectlargefemalesoulsasBiographyorPaintinghas；andtopickoutaselfish，shallow，illiteratecreature，withnothingbutbeauty，andbestowthreeenormousvolumesonher，istomakeaperverseselection，beautybeing，afterall，rarerinwomenthanwit，sense，andgoodness。Itisasfalseandignobleinart，astomarryaprettyfacewithoutheartandbrainsissillyinconduct。
Besides，itgivesthefemale_reader_alowmodelinsteadofahighone，andsodoesheralittleharm；whereasawriteroughttodogood——ortry，atallevents。
Havingallthisinmymind，andrememberinghowmanynoblewomenhaveshonelikestarsineveryageandeveryland，andfeelingsurethat，ascivilizationadvances，suchwomenwillbecomefarmorecommon，IhavetriedtolookaheadandpaintLaKlosking。
Butsuchportraitureisdifficult。Itislikewritingastatue。
\"Quimihinoncreditfaciatlicetipsepericlum，Moxfueritstudisaequiorillemeis。\"
HarringtonVizard，Esq。，caughtMissFannyDoveronthetoproundbutoneofthestepsofhislibrary。Shelookeddown，pinkish，andsaidshewassearchingfor\"Tillotson\'sSermons。\"
\"Whatonearthcanyouwantofthem?\"
\"Toimprovemymind，tobesure，\"saidtheminx。
Vizardsaid，\"Nowyoustaythere，miss——don\'tyoumove；\"andhesentforIna。Shecamedirectly，andhesaid，\"Thingshavecometoaclimax。Myladyishuntingfor\'Tillotson\'sSermons。\'PoorDenison!\"(Thatwastherosycurate\'sname。)
\"Well，\"saidFanny，turningred，\"ItoldyouI_should。_WhyshouldIbegoodanylonger?Allthesickarecuredonewayorother，andIammyselfagain。\"
\"Humph!\"saidVizard。\"Unfortunatelyforyourlittleplansofconduct，theheadsofthisestablishment，herepresent，havesatinsecretcommittee，andyourwingsaretobeclipped——byorderofcouncil。\"
\"La!\"saidFanny，pertly。
Vizardimposedsilencewithalordlywave。\"Itisalaughablething；butthisdivineisinearnest。Hehasrevealedhishopesandfearstome。\"
\"Thenheisagreatbaby，\"saidFanny，comingdownthesteps。\"No，no；wearebothtoopoor。\"Andsheventedalittlesigh。
\"Notyou。Thevicarhaswrittentovacate。Now，Idon\'tlikeyoumuch，becauseyounevermakemelaugh；butI\'mawfullyfondofDenison；and，ifyouwillmarrymydearDenison，youshallhavethevicarage；itisafatone。\"
\"Oh，cousin!\"
\"And，\"saidMrs。Vizard，\"hepermitsmetofurnishitforyou。YouandI
willmakeit\'abijou。\'\"
Fannykissedthemboth，impetuously:thensaidshewouldhavealittlecry。Nosoonersaidthandone。InduecourseshewasMrs。Denison，andbrokeasolemnvowthatsheneverwouldteachgirlsSt。Matthew。
Likecoquettesingeneral，whohavehadtheirflingatthepropertime，shemakesaprettygoodwife；butshehasonefault——sheistoohardupongirlswhoflirt。
Mr。Ashmeadflourishes。Besideshisagencyshesometimestreatsforanewpiece，collectsalittlecompany，andtourstheprovincialtheaters。
HealwaysplaysthemaweekatTaddington，andwithperfectgravitylosessixpoundspernight。Thenhehasa\"bespeak，\"VizardorUxmoorturnabout。Thereisalineofcarriages；thesnobscrowdintoseethegentry。Vizardpaystwentypoundsforhisbox，andtakestwentypounds\'
worthoftickets，and，Josephisinhisglory，andstaysbehindthecompanytogotoIslipChurchnextday，andspendahappynightattheCourt。Afterthathesayshefeels_good_forthreeorfourdays。
Mrs。GalenowleasestheHillstokefarmofVizard，anddoesprettywell。
Shebreedsagreatmanysheepandcattle。Thehighgroundandshelteringwoodssuitthem。Shemakesalittlemoneyeveryyear，andgetsaverygoodhousefornothing。DoctressGaleisstillalleyes，andnoticeseverything。Shestudieshard，andpracticesalittle。TheytriedtokeepheroutoftheTaddingtoninfirmary；butshewent，almostcrying，toVizard，andheexplodedwithwrath。HeconsultedLordUxmoor，andbetweenthemtheinfirmarywasthreatenedwiththewithdrawalofeightyannualsubscriptionsiftheypersisted。Themanagerscaveddirectly，andDoctressGaleisasteadyvisitor。
Afewmothersarecomingtotheirsensesandsendingforhertotheirunmarrieddaughters。Thisisthemainsourceofherprofessionalincome。
Shehas，however，takenoneenormousfeefromabonvivant，whoselifeshesavedbyesculents。Shetoldhimatoncehewasbeyondthereachofmedicine，andshecoulddonothingforhimunlesshechosetoliveinherhouse，andeatanddrinkonlywhatsheshouldgivehim。Hehadahorrorofdying，thoughhehadlivedsowell；sohesubmitted，andshedidactuallycurethatoneglutton。Butshesaysshewillneverdoitagain。
\"Afterfortyyearsofmadedishestheyoughttobecontenttodie；itisbarejustice，\"quothRhodaGale，M。D。
AnapothecaryinBarfordthreatenedtoindictthisGallicphysician。Buttheothermedicalmendissuadedhim，partlyfromliberality，partlyfromdiscretion:thefinewouldhavebeenpaidbypublicsubscriptiontwentytimesoverandnothinggainedbutobloquy。Thedoctresswouldneverhaveyielded。
Shevisits，andprescribes，andlaughsatthelaw，asloveissaidtolaughatlocksmiths。
Tobesure，inthiscountry，alawisnolaw，whenithasnofoundationinjustice，morality，orpublicpolicy。
Happyinherposition，andinherfriends，shenowreviewspasteventswiththecandorofamindthatlovestruthsincerely。ShewentintoVizard\'sstudyoneday，foldedherarms，anddeliveredherselfasfollows:\"Iguessthere\'ssomethingIoughttosaytoyou。WhenItoldyouaboutourtreatmentatEdinburgh，thewoundstillbled，andIdidnotmeasuremywordsasIought，professingscience。NowIfeelacalltosaythattheEdinburghschoolwas，afterall，moreliberaltousthananyotherinGreatBritainorIreland。Theothersclosedthedoorinourfaces。Thisschoolopenedithalf。Atfirsttherewasaliberalspirit；
butthefriendsofjusticegotfrightened，andtheunionistsstronger。Wewereoverpoweredateveryturn。ButwhatIomittedtoimpressonyou，is，thatwhenweweredefeated，itwasalwaysbyverysmallmajorities。Thatwassoevenwiththeopinionsofthejudges，whichhavebeendeliveredsinceItoldyoumytale。Thereweresixjurists，andonlysevenpettifoggers。Itwassoallthrough。Now，forpracticalpurposes，theactofamajorityistheactofabody。Itmustbeso。Itisthewayoftheworld:butwhenanaccuratepersoncomestodescribeabusiness，anddealwiththecharacterofawholeuniversity，sheisnottocallthelargerhalfthewhole，andmakethematterworsethanitwas。Thatisnotscientific。Sciencediscriminates。\"
Iamnotsorrythedoctressofferedthislittleexplanation；itaccordswithhersobermindandhervenerationoftruth。ButIcouldhavedispensedwithitforone。InBritain，whenwearehurt，wehowl；andthedeuceisinitiftheweakmaynothowlwhenthestrongoverpowerthembytheartsoftheweak。
ShouldthatpartofmytalerouseanyhonestsympathywiththisEnglishwomanwhocanlegallyprescribe，consult，andtakefees，inFrance，butnotinEngland，thoughshecouldeclipseatapublicexaminationnine-tenthsofthosewhocan，itmaybeaswelltoinformthemthat，evenwhilehernarrativewasinthepress，ourGovernmentdeclareditwoulddosomethingforthereliefofmedicalwomen，butwouldsleepuponit。
Thisis，onthewhole，encouraging。Butstill，wherethereisnostimulusoffactionorpersonalinteresttourgeameasure，butonlysuch\"unconsideredtrifles\"aspublicjusticeandpublicpolicy，therearealwaystwogreatdangers:1。Thatthesleepmayknownowaking；2。ThataftertoolongasleeptheBritishlegislatormayjumpoutofbedallinahurry，anddotheworkineffectually；fornothingleadsoftenertorecklesshastethanlongdelay。
Ihope，then，thatafewofmyinfluentialreaderswillbevigilant，andchallengeafulldiscussionbythewholemindofParliament，sothatnotemporary，pettifogginghalf-measuremayslipintoathinhouse——likeaweaselintoanemptybarn——andsoobstructformanyyearslegislationupondurableprinciple。Thethingliesinanutshell。TheLegislaturehasbeenentrapped。Itneverintendedtooutlawwomeninthematter。Thepersonswhohaveoutlawedthemareallsubjects，andtheenginesofoutlawryhavebeen\"certificatesofattendanceonlectures，\"and\"publicexaminations。\"Byclosingthelectureroomandtheexaminationhalltoallwomen——learnedorunlearned——acliquehasoutlawedapopulation，undertheletter，notthespirit，ofabadlywrittenstatute。ButitisforthethreeestatesoftheBritishrealmtoleaveoffscribblingstatutes，andlearntowritethem，andtobridletheegotismofcliques，andrespectthenation。Thepresentformofgovernmentexistsonthatunderstanding，andsomustallformsofgovernmentinEngland。Anditissoeasy。Itonlywantsalittlesinglenessofmindandcommonsense。
Yearsagocertificatesofattendanceonvariouslectureswerereasonablydemanded。Theywereaslightpresumptiveevidenceofproficiency，andhadasupplementaryvalue，becausethepublicexaminationsweresolooseandinadequate；butonceestablishastiff，searching，sufficient，incorruptible，publicexamination，andthentohavepassedthatexaminationisnotpresumptive，butdemonstrative，proofofproficiency，andswallowsupallminorandmerelypresumptiveproofs。
Thereisnothingmuchstupiderthananachronism。Whatavailcertificatesoflecturesinourday?eithertheknowledgeobtainedatthelecturesenablesthepupiltopassthegreatexamination，oritdoesnot。Ifitdoes，thecertificateissuperfluous；ifitdoesnot，thecertificateisillusory。
WhattheBritishlegislator，ifforoncehewouldrisetobealawgiver，shoulddo，andthatquickly，istothrowopenthemedicalschoolstoallpersonsformatriculation。Tothrowopenallhospitalsandinfirmariestomatriculatedstudents，withoutrespectofsex，astheyarealreadyopen，byshamelesspartialityandtransparentgreed，tounmatriculatedwomen，providedtheyconfinetheirambitiontothemostrepulsiveandunfemininepartofmedicine，thenursingofbothsexes，andlayingoutofcorpses。
Boththeaboverights，asindependentofsexasothernaturalrights，shouldbeexpresslyprotectedby\"mandamus，\"and\"suitfordamages。\"Thelecturerstobecompelledtolecturetomixedclasses，ortogiveseparatelecturestomatriculatedwomenforhalffees，whicheverthoselecturersprefer。Beforethisclausealldifficultieswouldmelt，likehailinthedogdays。，Malemodestyisapurelyimaginaryarticle，setupforatradepurpose，andwillgivewaytojusticethemomentitcoststheproprietorsfiftypercent。Iknowmyownsexfromhairtoheel，andwilltakemyBibleoathof_that。_
Oftheforeignmatriculatedstudent，BritishorEuropean，nothingshouldbedemandedhuttheonething，whichmattersonestraw——viz。，infallibleproofsofproficiencyinanatomy，surgery，medicine，anditscollaterals，underpublicexamination。This，whichistheonlyrealsafeguard，andtheonlynecessarysafeguardtothepublic，andtheonlyone_thepublic_
ask，shouldheplaced，insomedegree，under_thesurecontrolofGovernment_withoutrespectofcities；andmuchgreatervigilanceexercisedthaneverhasbeenyet。Why，underthesystemwhichexcludeslearnedwomen，maledunceshavebeenpersonatedbyablestudents，andsodiplomasstolenagainandagain。Thestudent，maleorfemale，shouldhavepowertocompeltheexaminers，bymandamusandotherstringentremedies，toexamineatfittimesandseasons。Inallthe_paperwork_oftheseexaminations，thename，andofcoursethesex，ofthestudentshouldheconcealedfromtheexaminers。Thereisaverysimplewayofdoingit。
Shouldalawbepassedonthisbroadandsimplebasis，thatlawwillstandimmortal，withpettifoggingactsfallingallaround，accordingtothecustomofthecountry。Thelargerhalfofthepopulationwillnolongerbeunconstitutionallyjuggled，undercoveroflaw，outoftheirrighttotaketheirsecretailmentstoaskilledphysicianoftheirownsex，andcompelledtogo，blushing，writhing，and，afterall，concealingandfibbing，toamalephysician；thepickedfewnolongerrobbedoftheirrighttoscience，reputation，andBread。
Thegoodeffectonthewholemindofwomanwouldbeincalculable。Greatprizesofstudyandgeniusofferedtotheablefewhavealwaysasalutaryandwonderfuloperationonthemanywhonevergainthem；itwouldbegreatandgladtidingstoourwholefemaleyouthtosay，\"Youneednotbefrivolousidlers；youneednotgivethecoltsfiftyyards\'startfortheDerby——Imean，youneednotwastethreehoursoftheshortworkingdayindressingandundressing，andcombingyourhair。Youneednotthrowawaytheveryseed——timeoflifeonmusic，thoughyouareunmusicaltothebackbone；noryetonyourthree\"C\'s——croquet，crochet，andcoquetry:forCivilizationandsoundLawhaveopenedtoyouonegreat，noble，anddifficultprofessionwiththreebranches，twoofwhichNatureintendedyoufor。Thepathisarduous，butflowersgrowbesideit，andtheprizeisgreat。\"
Isaythatthisprize，andfrequentintercoursewiththosesuperiorwomenwhohavewonit，wouldleaventhewholesexwithhigherviewsoflifethanentertheirheadsatpresent；wouldraisetheirself-respect，andsetthousandsofthemtostudythegreatandnoblethingsthatareinmedicine，andconnectedwithit，insteadofchildishthings。
Istherereallyonemanlyheartthatwouldgrudgethisboontoasexwhichisthenurseandbenefactressofeverymaninhistenderandmostprecariousyears?
Realizethehardconditionofwomen。Amongbarbarianstheirlotisunmixedmisery；withustheirconditionisbetter，butnotwhatitoughttobe，becausewearebuthalfcivilized，andsotheirlotisstillveryunhappycomparedwithours。
Andwearesounreasonable。Wemencannotgostraighttenyardswithout_rewards_aswellaspunishments。Yetwecouldgovernourwomenbypunishmentsalone。Theyareeternallytemptedtofolly，yetsnubbedthemomenttheywouldbewise。Amillionshopsspreadtheirnets，andenticethembytheirdirestfoible。Theirverymothers——forwantofmedicalknowledgeinthesex——claspthefatal，idioticcorsetontheirgrowingbodies，thoughthinasalath。Sothegirlgrowsup，crippledintheribsandlungsbyherownmother；andherlife，too，isinstays——cabined，cribbed，confined:unlessshecanpaint，oract，orwritenovels，everypathofhonorableambitionisclosedtoher。Wetreatheraswedoourprivatesoldiers——thelash，butnopromotion；andourprivatesoldiersarethescumofEuropeforthatveryreason，andnoother。
Isaythattoopenthestudyandpracticeofmedicinetowomenfolk，undertheinfalliblesafeguardofastiffpublicexamination，willbetoriseinrespectforhumanrightstothelevelofEuropeannations，whodonotbragaboutjustfreedomhalfasloudaswedo，andtorespecttheconstitutionalrightsofmanymillioncitizens，whoallpaythetaxeslikemen，and，bythecontractwiththeStateimpliedinthatpayment，buytheclearhumanrighttheyhaveyettogodownontheirkneesfor。Itwillalsoimportintomedicalscienceanewandlesstheoretical，butcautious，teachable，observantkindofintellect；itwillgivethelargerhalfofthenationanhonorableambition，andanhonorablepursuit，towardwhichtheirheartsandinstinctsarebentbyNatureherself；itwilltendtoelevatethiswholesex，anditsyoungchildren，maleaswellasfemale，andsowilladvancethecivilizationoftheworld，whichinagespast，inourownday，andinalltime，hath，anddoth，andwill，keepstepexactlywiththeprogressofwomentowardmentalequalitywithmen。
