第5章

类别:其他 作者:Joseph Conrad字数:17771更新时间:18/12/14 10:45:39
scendedslowly,pathetically,andthen,withthelongblackeyelasheslyingonherwhitecheeks,shelookedreadytofalldowninaswoon。Butsheneverevenswayedwhereshestood。Heurgedherloudlytofollowhimatonce,andwalkedtowardsthedooratthebottomofthecellarstairswithoutlookingbehindhim。 And,asamatteroffact,shedidmoveafterhimapaceortwo。But,ofcourse,hewasnotallowedtoreachthedoor。Therewereangryexclamations,ashort,fiercescuffle。Flungawayviolently,hecameflyingback- wardsuponher,andfell。Shethrewoutherarmsinagestureofdismayandsteppedaside,justclearofhishead,whichstruckthegroundheavilynearhershoe。 \"Hegruntedwiththeshock。Bythetimehehadpickedhimselfup,slowly,dazedly,hewasawaketotherealityofthings。Themanintowhosehandshehadthrusttheleathercasehadextractedtherefromanarrowstripofbluishpaper。Hehelditupabovehishead,and,asafterthescuffleanexpectantuneasystill- nessreignedoncemore,hethrewitdowndisdainfullywiththewords,\'Ithink,comrades,thatthisproofwashardlynecessary。\' \"Quickasthought,thegirlstoopedaftertheflutter- ingslip。Holdingitspreadoutinbothhands,shelookedatit;then,withoutraisinghereyes,openedherfingersslowlyandletitfall。 \"Iexaminedthatcuriousdocumentafterwards。Itwassignedbyaveryhighpersonage,andstampedandcountersignedbyotherhighofficialsinvariouscountriesofEurope。Inhistrade——orshallIsay,inhismission?—— thatsortoftalismanmighthavebeennecessary,nodoubt。Eventothepoliceitself——allbuttheheads—— hehadbeenknownonlyasSevrinthenotedanarchist。 \"Hehunghishead,bitinghislowerlip。Achangehadcomeoverhim,asortofthoughtful,absorbedcalm- ness。Nevertheless,hepanted。Hissidesworkedvisi- bly,andhisnostrilsexpandedandcollapsedinweirdcontrastwithhissombreaspectofafanaticalmonkinameditativeattitude,butwithsomething,too,inhisfaceofanactorintentupontheterribleexigenciesofhispart。BeforehimHornedeclaimed,haggardandbearded,likeaninspireddenunciatoryprophetfromawilderness。Twofanatics。Theyweremadetounder- standeachother。Doesthissurpriseyou?Isup- poseyouthinkthatsuchpeoplewouldbefoamingatthemouthandsnarlingateachother?\" IprotestedhastilythatIwasnotsurprisedintheleast;thatIthoughtnothingofthekind;thatanarchistsingeneralweresimplyinconceivabletomementally,morally,logically,sentimentally,andevenphysically。 Xreceivedthisdeclarationwithhisusualwoodennessandwenton。 \"Hornehadburstoutintoeloquence。Whilepour- ingoutscornfulinvective,helettearsescapefromhiseyesandrolldownhisblackbeardunheeded。Sevrinpantedquickerandquicker。Whenheopenedhismouthtospeak,everyonehungonhiswords。 \"\'Don\'tbeafool,Horne,\'hebegan。\'YouknowverywellthatIhavedonethisfornoneofthereasonsyouarethrowingatme。\'Andinamomenthebecameoutwardlyassteadyasarockundertheother\'sluridstare。\'Ihavebeenthwarting,deceiving,andbetrayingyou——fromconviction。\' \"HeturnedhisbackonHorne,andaddressingthegirl,repeatedthewords:\'Fromconviction。\' \"It\'sextraordinaryhowcoldshelooked。Isupposeshecouldnotthinkofanyappropriategesture。Therecanhavebeenfewprecedentsindeedforsuchasitu- ation。 \"\'Clearasdaylight,\'headded。\'Doyouunderstandwhatthatmeans?Fromconviction。\' \"Andstillshedidnotstir。Shedidnotknowwhattodo。Butthelucklesswretchwasabouttogivehertheopportunityforabeautifulandcorrectgesture。 \"\'Ihavefeltinmethepowertomakeyousharethisconviction,\'heprotested,ardently。Hehadfor- gottenhimself;hemadeasteptowardsher——perhapshestumbled。Tomeheseemedtobestoopinglowasiftotouchthehemofhergarment。Andthentheappropriategesturecame。Shesnatchedherskirtawayfromhispollutingcontactandavertedherheadwithanupwardtilt。Itwasmagnificentlydone,thisgestureofconventionallyunstainedhonour,ofanun- blemishedhigh-mindedamateur。 \"Nothingcouldhavebeenbetter。Andheseemedtothinkso,too,foroncemoreheturnedaway。Butthistimehefacednoone。Hewasagainpantingfright- fully,whilehefumbledhurriedlyinhiswaistcoatpocket,andthenraisedhishandtohislips。Therewassomethingfurtiveinthismovement,butdirectlyafter- wardshisbearingchanged。Hislabouredbreathinggavehimaresemblancetoamanwhohadjustrunadesperaterace;butacuriousairofdetachment,ofsud- denandprofoundindifference,replacedthestrainofthestrivingeffort。Theracewasover。Ididnotwanttoseewhatwouldhappennext。Iwasonlytoowellaware。Ituckedtheyounglady\'sarmunderminewithoutaword,andmademywaywithhertothestairs。 \"Herbrotherwalkedbehindus。Half-wayuptheshortflightsheseemedunabletoliftherfeethighenoughforthesteps,andwehadtopullandpushtogethertothetop。Inthepassageshedraggedherselfalong,hangingonmyarm,helplesslybentlikeanoldwoman。Weissuedintoanemptystreetthroughahalf-opendoor,staggeringlikebesottedrevellers。Atthecornerwestoppedafour-wheeler,andtheancientdriverlookedroundfromhisboxwithmorosescornatoureffortstogetherin。TwiceduringthedriveIfelthercollapseonmyshoulderinahalffaint。Facingus,theyouthinknickerbockersremainedasmuteasafish,and,tillhejumpedoutwiththelatch-key,satmorestillthanIwouldhavebelieveditpossible。 \"Atthedooroftheirdrawing-roomsheleftmyarmandwalkedinfirst,catchingatthechairsandtables。 Sheunpinnedherhat,then,exhaustedwiththeeffort,hercloakstillhangingfromhershoulders,flungher- selfintoadeeparmchair,sideways,herfacehalfburiedinacushion。Thegoodbrotherappearedsilentlybeforeherwithaglassofwater。Shemotioneditaway。Hedrankithimselfandwalkedofftoadis- tantcorner——behindthegrandpiano,somewhere。AllwasstillinthisroomwhereIhadseen,forthefirsttime,Sevrin,theanti-anarchist,captivatedandspell- boundbytheconsummateandhereditarygrimacesthatinacertainsphereoflifetaketheplaceoffeelingswithanexcellenteffect。Isupposeherthoughtswerebusywiththesamememory。Hershouldersshookviolently。Apureattackofnerves。Whenitquieteddownsheaffectedfirmness,\'Whatisdonetoamanofthatsort?Whatwilltheydotohim?\' \"\'Nothing。Theycandonothingtohim,\'Iassuredher,withperfecttruth。Iwasprettycertainhehaddiedinlessthantwentyminutesfromthemomenthishandhadgonetohislips。Forifhisfanaticalanti- anarchismwentevenasfarascarryingpoisoninhispocket,onlytorobhisadversariesoflegitimateven- geance,Iknewhewouldtakecaretoprovidesomethingthatwouldnotfailhimwhenrequired。 \"Shedrewanangrybreath。Therewereredspotsonhercheeksandafeverishbrillianceinhereyes。 \"\'Haseveranyonebeenexposedtosuchaterribleexperience?Tothinkthathehadheldmyhand! Thatman!\'Herfacetwitched,shegulpeddownapatheticsob。\'IfIeverfeltsureofanything,itwasofSevrin\'shigh-mindedmotives。\' \"Thenshebegantoweepquietly,whichwasgoodforher。Thenthroughherfloodoftears,halfresentful,\'Whatwasithesaidtome?——\"Fromconviction!\" Itseemedavilemockery。Whatcouldhemeanbyit?\' \"\'That,mydearyounglady,\'Isaid,gently,\'ismorethanIoranybodyelsecaneverexplaintoyou。\'\" Mr。Xflickedacrumboffthefrontofhiscoat。 \"Andthatwasstrictlytrueastoher。ThoughHorne,forinstance,understoodverywell;andsodidI,especiallyafterwehadbeentoSevrin\'slodginginadismalbackstreetofanintenselyrespectablequarter。 Hornewasknownthereasafriend,andwehadnodifficultyinbeingadmitted,theslatternlymaidmerelyremarking,assheletusin,that\'MrSevrinhadnotbeenhomethatnight。\'Weforcedopenacoupleofdrawersinthewayofduty,andfoundalittleusefulinformation。 Themostinterestingpartwashisdiary;forthisman,engagedinsuchdeadlywork,hadtheweaknesstokeeparecordofthemostdamnatorykind。Therewerehisactsandalsohisthoughtslaidbaretous。Butthedeaddon\'tmindthat。Theydon\'tmindanything。 \"\'Fromconviction。\'Yes。Avaguebutardenthumanitarianismhadurgedhiminhisfirstyouthintothebitterestextremityofnegationandrevolt。After- wardshisoptimismflinched。Hedoubtedandbecamelost。Youhaveheardofconvertedatheists。Theseturnoftenintodangerousfanatics,butthesoulremainsthesame。Afterhehadgotacquaintedwiththegirl,therearetobemetinthatdiaryofhisveryqueerpolitico-amorousrhapsodies。Hetookhersovereigngrimaceswithdeadlyseriousness。Helongedtocon- verther。Butallthiscannotinterestyou。Fortherest,Idon\'tknowifyouremember——itisagoodmanyyearsagonow——thejournalisticsensationofthe\'Hermi- oneStreetMystery\';thefindingofaman\'sbodyinthecellarofanemptyhouse;theinquest;somearrests; manysurmises——thensilence——theusualendformanyobscuremartyrsandconfessors。Thefactis,hewasnotenoughofanoptimist。Youmustbeasavage,tyrannical,pitiless,thick-and-thinoptimist,likeHorne,forinstance,tomakeagoodsocialrebeloftheextremetype。 Herosefromthetable。Awaiterhurriedupwithhisovercoat;anotherheldhishatinreadiness。 \"Butwhatbecameoftheyounglady?\"Iasked。 \"Doyoureallywanttoknow?\"hesaid,buttoninghimselfinhisfurcoatcarefully。\"IconfesstothesmallmaliceofsendingherSevrin\'sdiary。Shewentintoretirement;thenshewenttoFlorence;thenshewentintoretreatinaconvent。Ican\'ttellwhereshewillgonext。Whatdoesitmatter?Gestures!Gestures! Meregesturesofherclass。\" Hefittedonhisglossyhighhatwithextremepre- cision,andcastingarapidglanceroundtheroom,fullofwell-dressedpeople,innocentlydining,mutteredbetweenhisteeth: \"Andnothingelse!Thatiswhytheirkindisfatedtoperish。\" InevermetMr。Xagainafterthatevening。Itooktodiningatmyclub。OnmynextvisittoParisIfoundmyfriendallimpatiencetohearoftheeffectproducedonmebythisrareitemofhiscollection。Itoldhimallthestory,andhebeamedonmewiththeprideofhisdistinguishedspecimen。 \"Isn\'tXwellworthknowing?\"hebubbledoveringreatdelight。\"He\'sunique,amazing,absolutelyterrific。\" Hisenthusiasmgrateduponmyfinerfeelings。I toldhimcurtlythattheman\'scynicismwassimplyabominable。 \"Oh,abominable!abominable!\"assentedmyfriend,effusively。\"Andthen,youknow,helikestohavehislittlejokesometimes,\"headdedinaconfidentialtone。 Ifailtounderstandtheconnectionofthislastre- mark。Ihavebeenutterlyunabletodiscoverwhereinallthisthejokecomesin。 ANINDIGNANTTALE THEBRUTE DODGINGinfromtherain-sweptstreet,IexchangedasmileandaglancewithMissBlankinthebaroftheThreeCrows。Thisexchangewaseffectedwithex- tremepropriety。Itisashocktothinkthat,ifstillalive,MissBlankmustbesomethingoversixtynow。 Howtimepasses! Noticingmygazedirectedinquiringlyattheparti- tionofglassandvarnishedwood,MissBlankwasgoodenoughtosay,encouragingly: \"OnlyMr。JermynandMr。StonorintheparlourwithanothergentlemanI\'veneverseenbefore。\" Imovedtowardstheparlourdoor。Avoicedis- coursingontheotherside(itwasbutamatchboardpartition),rosesoloudlythattheconcludingwordsbecamequiteplaininalltheiratrocity。 \"ThatfellowWilmotfairlydashedherbrainsout,andagoodjob,too!\" Thisinhumansentiment,sincetherewasnothingprofaneorimproperinit,failedtodoasmuchastochecktheslightyawnMissBlankwasachievingbehindherhand。Andsheremainedgazingfixedlyatthewindow-panes,whichstreamedwithrain。 AsIopenedtheparlourdoorthesamevoicewentoninthesamecruelstrain: \"IwasgladwhenIheardshegottheknockfromsomebodyatlast。SorryenoughforpoorWilmot,though。ThatmanandIusedtobechumsatonetime。Ofcoursethatwastheendofhim。Aclearcaseifthereeverwasone。Nowayoutofit。Noneatall。\" ThevoicebelongedtothegentlemanMissBlankhadneverseenbefore。Hestraddledhislonglegsonthehearthrug。Jermyn,leaningforward,heldhispocket- handkerchiefspreadoutbeforethegrate。Helookedbackdismallyoverhisshoulder,andasIslippedbehindoneofthelittlewoodentables,Inoddedtohim。Ontheothersideofthefire,imposinglycalmandlarge,satMr。Stonor,jammedtightintoacapaciousWindsorarmchair。Therewasnothingsmallabouthimbuthisshort,whiteside-whiskers。Yardsandyardsofextrasuperfinebluecloth(madeupintoanovercoat) reposedonachairbyhisside。Andhemustjusthavebroughtsomelinerfromsea,becauseanotherchairwassmotheredunderhisblackwaterproof,ampleasapall,andmadeofthree-foldoiledsilk,double-stitchedthroughout。Aman\'shand-bagoftheusualsizelookedlikeachild\'stoyonthefloornearhisfeet。 Ididnotnodtohim。Hewastoobigtobenoddedtointhatparlour。HewasaseniorTrinitypilotandcondescendedtotakehisturninthecutteronlyduringthesummermonths。HehadbeenmanytimesinchargeofroyalyachtsinandoutofPortVictoria。 Besides,it\'snousenoddingtoamonument。Andhewaslikeone。Hedidn\'tspeak,hedidn\'tbudge。Hejustsatthere,holdinghishandsomeoldheadup,immovable,andalmostbiggerthanlife。Itwasex- tremelyfine。Mr。Stonor\'spresencereducedpooroldJermyntoamereshabbywispofaman,andmadethetalkativestrangerintweedsonthehearthruglookabsurdlyboyish。Thelattermusthavebeenafewyearsoverthirty,andwascertainlynotthesortofindividualthatgetsabashedatthesoundofhisownvoice,becausegatheringmein,asitwere,byafriendlyglance,hekeptitgoingwithoutacheck。 \"Iwasgladofit,\"herepeated,emphatically。\"Youmaybesurprisedatit,butthenyouhaven\'tgonethroughtheexperienceI\'vehadofher。Icantellyou,itwassomethingtoremember。Ofcourse,Igotoffscotfreemyself——asyoucansee。Shedidherbesttobreakupmypluckformetho\'。Shejollyneardroveasfineafellowaseverlivedintoamadhouse。Whatdoyousaytothat——eh?\" NotaneyelidtwitchedinMr。Stonor\'senormousface。 Monumental!Thespeakerlookedstraightintomyeyes。 \"Itusedtomakemesicktothinkofhergoingabouttheworldmurderingpeople。\" Jermynapproachedthehandkerchiefalittlenearertothegrateandgroaned。Itwassimplyahabithehad。 \"I\'veseenheronce,\"hedeclared,withmournfulin- difference。\"Shehadahouse——\" Thestrangerintweedsturnedtostaredownathim,surprised。 \"Shehadthreehouses,\"hecorrected,authoritatively。 ButJermynwasnottobecontradicted。 \"Shehadahouse,Isay,\"herepeated,withdismalobstinacy。\"Agreat,big,ugly,whitething。Youcouldseeitfrommilesaway——stickingup。\" \"Soyoucould,\"assentedtheotherreadily。\"ItwasoldColchester\'snotion,thoughhewasalwaysthreaten- ingtogiveherup。Hecouldn\'tstandherracketanymore,hedeclared;itwastoomuchofagoodthingforhim;hewouldwashhishandsofher,ifhenevergotholdofanother——andsoon。Idaresayhewouldhavechuckedher,only——itmaysurpriseyou——hismissuswouldn\'thearofit。Funny,eh?Butwithwomen,youneverknowhowtheywilltakeathing,andMrs。 Colchester,withhermoustachesandbigeyebrows,setupforbeingasstrong-mindedastheymakethem。Sheusedtowalkaboutinabrownsilkdress,withagreatgoldcablefloppingaboutherbosom。Youshouldhaveheardhersnappingout:\'Rubbish!\'or\'Stuffandnon- sense!\'Idaresaysheknewwhenshewaswelloff。 Theyhadnochildren,andhadneversetupahomeany- where。WheninEnglandshejustmadeshifttohangoutanyhowinsomecheaphotelorboarding-house。I daresayshelikedtogetbacktothecomfortsshewasusedto。Sheknewverywellshecouldn\'tgainbyanychange。And,moreover,Colchester,thoughafirst- rateman,wasnotwhatyoumaycallinhisfirstyouth,and,perhaps,shemayhavethoughtthathewouldn\'tbeabletogetholdofanother(asheusedtosay)soeasily。Anyhow,foronereasonoranother,itwas\'Rubbish\'and\'Stuffandnonsense\'forthegoodlady。 IoverheardonceyoungMr。Apsehimselfsaytoherconfidentially:\'Iassureyou,Mrs。Colchester,Iambeginningtofeelquiteunhappyaboutthenameshe\'sgettingforherself。\'\'Oh,\'saysshe,withherdeeplittlehoarselaugh,\'ifonetooknoticeofallthesillytalk,\' andsheshowedApseallheruglyfalseteethatonce。 \'Itwouldtakemorethanthattomakemelosemyconfidenceinher,Iassureyou,\'saysshe。\" Atthispoint,withoutanychangeoffacialexpression,Mr。Stonoremittedashort,sardoniclaugh。Itwasveryimpressive,butIdidn\'tseethefun。Ilookedfromonetoanother。Thestrangeronthehearthrughadanuglysmile。 \"AndMr。ApseshookbothMrs。Colchester\'shands,hewassopleasedtohearagoodwordsaidfortheirfavourite。AlltheseApses,youngandoldyouknow,wereperfectlyinfatuatedwiththatabominable,dan- gerous——\" \"Ibegyourpardon,\"Iinterrupted,forheseemedtobeaddressinghimselfexclusivelytome;\"butwhoonearthareyoutalkingabout?\" \"IamtalkingoftheApsefamily,\"heanswered,courteously。 Inearlyletoutadamnatthis。ButjustthentherespectedMissBlankputherheadin,andsaidthatthecabwasatthedoor,ifMr。Stonorwantedtocatchtheeleventhreeup。 Atoncetheseniorpilotaroseinhismightybulkandbegantostruggleintohiscoat,withawe-inspiringup- heavals。ThestrangerandIhurriedimpulsivelytohisassistance,anddirectlywelaidourhandsonhimhebecameperfectlyquiescent。Wehadtoraiseourarmsveryhigh,andtomakeefforts。Itwaslikecaparisoningadocileelephant。Witha\"Thanks,gentlemen,\"hedivedunderandsqueezedhimselfthroughthedoorinagreathurry。 Wesmiledateachotherinafriendlyway。 \"Iwonderhowhemanagestohoisthimselfupaship\'sside-ladder,\"saidthemanintweeds;andpoorJermyn,whowasamereNorthSeapilot,withoutofficialstatusorrecognitionofanysort,pilotonlybycourtesy,groaned。 \"Hemakeseighthundredayear。\" \"Areyouasailor?\"Iaskedthestranger,whohadgonebacktohispositionontherug。 \"Iusedtobetillacoupleofyearsago,whenIgotmarried,\"answeredthiscommunicativeindividual。\"I evenwenttoseafirstinthatveryshipwewerespeak- ingofwhenyoucamein。\" \"Whatship?\"Iasked,puzzled。\"Ineverheardyoumentionaship。\" \"I\'vejusttoldyouhername,mydearsir,\"hereplied。 \"TheApseFamily。Surelyyou\'veheardofthegreatfirmofApse&Sons,shipowners。Theyhadaprettybigfleet。TherewastheLucyApse,andtheHaroldApse,andAnne,John,Malcolm,Clara,Juliet,andsoon——noendofApses。Everybrother,sister,aunt,cousin,wife——andgrandmother,too,forallIknow——ofthefirmhadashipnamedafterthem。Good,solid,old-fashionedcrafttheywere,too,builttocarryandtolast。Noneofyournew-fangled,labour-savingappliancesinthem,butplentyofmenandplentyofgoodsaltbeefandhardtackputaboard——andoffyougotofightyourwayoutandhomeagain。\" ThemiserableJermynmadeasoundofapproval,whichsoundedlikeagroanofpain。Thoseweretheshipsforhim。Hepointedoutindolefultonesthatyoucouldn\'tsaytolabour-savingappliances:\"Jumplivelynow,myhearties。\"Nolabour-savingappliancewouldgoaloftonadirtynightwiththesandsunderyourlee。 \"No,\"assentedthestranger,withawinkatme。 \"TheApsesdidn\'tbelieveinthemeither,apparently。 Theytreatedtheirpeoplewell——aspeopledon\'tgettreatednowadays,andtheywereawfullyproudoftheirships。Nothingeverhappenedtothem。Thislastone,theApseFamily,wastobeliketheothers,onlyshewastobestillstronger,stillsafer,stillmoreroomyandcom- fortable。Ibelievetheymeanthertolastforever。 Theyhadherbuiltcomposite——iron,teak-wood,andgreenheart,andherscantlingwassomethingfabulous。 Ifeveranorderwasgivenforashipinaspiritofpridethisonewas。Everythingofthebest。Thecommodorecaptainoftheemploywastocommandher,andtheyplannedtheaccommodationforhimlikeahouseonshoreunderabig,tallpoopthatwentnearlytothemainmast。NowonderMrs。Colchesterwouldn\'tlettheoldmangiveherup。Why,itwasthebesthomesheeverhadinallhermarrieddays。Shehadanerve,thatwoman。 \"Thefussthatwasmadewhilethatshipwasbuild- ing!Let\'shavethisalittlestronger,andthatalittleheavier;andhadn\'tthatotherthingbetterbechangedforsomethingalittlethicker。Thebuildersenteredintothespiritofthegame,andthereshewas,growingintotheclumsiest,heaviestshipofhersizerightbeforealltheireyes,withoutanybodybecomingawareofitsomehow。Shewastobe2,000tonsregister,oralittleover;nolessonanyaccount。Butseewhathappens。 Whentheycametomeasurehersheturnedout1,999 tonsandafraction。Generalconsternation!AndtheysayoldMr。Apsewassoannoyedwhentheytoldhimthathetooktohisbedanddied。Theoldgentlemanhadretiredfromthefirmtwenty-fiveyearsbefore,andwasninety-sixyearsoldifaday,sohisdeathwasn\'t,perhaps,sosurprising。StillMr。LucianApsewascon- vincedthathisfatherwouldhavelivedtoahundred。 Sowemayputhimattheheadofthelist。Nextcomesthepoordevilofashipwrightthatbrutecaughtandsquashedasshewentofftheways。Theycalleditthelaunchofaship,butI\'veheardpeoplesaythat,fromthewailingandyellingandscramblingoutoftheway,itwasmorelikelettingadevillooseupontheriver。Shesnappedallhercheckslikepack-thread,andwentforthetugsinattendancelikeafury。Beforeanybodycouldseewhatshewasuptoshesentoneofthemtothebottom,andlaidupanotherforthreemonths\'repairs。Oneofhercablesparted,andthen,suddenly——youcouldn\'ttellwhy——sheletherselfbebroughtupwiththeotherasquietasalamb。 \"That\'showshewas。Youcouldneverbesurewhatshewouldbeuptonext。Thereareshipsdifficulttohandle,butgenerallyyoucandependonthembehav- ingrationally。Withthatship,whateveryoudidwithheryouneverknewhowitwouldend。Shewasawickedbeast。Or,perhaps,shewasonlyjustin- sane。\" HeutteredthissuppositioninsoearnestatonethatIcouldnotrefrainfromsmiling。Heleftoffbitinghislowerliptoapostrophizeme。 \"Eh!Whynot?Whycouldn\'ttherebesomethinginherbuild,inherlinescorrespondingto——What\'smadness?Onlysomethingjustatinybitwronginthemakeofyourbrain。Whyshouldn\'ttherebeamadship——Imeanmadinaship-likeway,sothatundernocircumstancescouldyoubesureshewoulddowhatanyothersensibleshipwouldnaturallydoforyou。Thereareshipsthatsteerwildly,andshipsthatcan\'tbequitetrustedalwaystostay;otherswantcarefulwatchingwhenrunninginagale;and,again,theremaybeashipthatwillmakeheavyweatherofitineverylittleblow。Butthenyouexpecthertobealwaysso。Youtakeitaspartofhercharacter,asaship,justasyoutakeaccountofaman\'speculiaritiesoftemperwhenyoudealwithhim。Butwithheryoucouldn\'t。Shewasunaccountable。Ifshewasn\'tmad,thenshewasthemostevil-minded,underhand,savagebrutethateverwentafloat。I\'veseenherruninaheavygalebeautifullyfortwodays,andonthethirdbroachtotwiceinthesameafternoon。Thefirsttimesheflungthehelmsmancleanoverthewheel,butasshedidn\'tquitemanagetokillhimshehadanothertryaboutthreehoursafterwards。Sheswampedherselfforeandaft,burstallthecanvaswehadset,scaredallhandsintoapanic,andevenfrightenedMrs。Colchesterdownthereinthesebeautifulsterncabinsthatshewassoproudof。Whenwemusteredthecrewtherewasonemanmissing。Sweptoverboard,ofcourse,withoutbeingeitherseenorheard,poordevil!andIonlywondermoreofusdidn\'tgo。 \"Alwayssomethinglikethat。Always。IheardanoldmatetellCaptainColchesteroncethatithadcometothiswithhim,thathewasafraidtoopenhismouthtogiveanysortoforder。Shewasasmuchofaterrorinharbourasatsea。Youcouldneverbecertainwhatwouldholdher。Ontheslightestprovocationshewouldstartsnappingropes,cables,wirehawsers,likecarrots。 Shewasheavy,clumsy,unhandy——butthatdoesnotquiteexplainthatpowerformischiefshehad。Youknow,somehow,whenIthinkofherIcan\'thelpre- memberingwhatwehearofincurablelunaticsbreakingloosenowandthen。\" Helookedatmeinquisitively。But,ofcourse,Icouldn\'tadmitthatashipcouldbemad。 \"Intheportswhereshewasknown,\"hewenton,\' \"theydreadedthesightofher。Shethoughtnothingofknockingawaytwentyfeetorsoofsolidstonefacingoffaquayorwipingofftheendofawoodenwharf。Shemusthavelostmilesofchainandhundredsoftonsofanchorsinhertime。Whenshefellaboardsomepoorunoffendingshipitwastheverydevilofajobtohaulheroffagain。Andshenevergothurtherself——justafewscratchesorso,perhaps。Theyhadwantedtohaveherstrong。Andsoshewas。StrongenoughtoramPolaricewith。Andasshebegansoshewenton。 Fromthedayshewaslaunchedsheneverletayearpasswithoutmurderingsomebody。Ithinktheownersgotveryworriedaboutit。Buttheywereastiff-neckedgenerationalltheseApses;theywouldn\'tadmittherecouldbeanythingwrongwiththeApseFamily。Theywouldn\'tevenchangehername。\'Stuffandnonsense,\' asMrs。Colchesterusedtosay。Theyoughtatleasttohaveshutherupforlifeinsomedrydockorother,awayuptheriver,andneverlethersmellsaltwateragain。I assureyou,mydearsir,thatsheinvariablydidkillsomeoneeveryvoyageshemade。Itwasperfectlywell-known。Shegotanameforit,farandwide。\" Iexpressedmysurprisethatashipwithsuchadeadlyreputationcouldevergetacrew。 \"Then,youdon\'tknowwhatsailorsare,mydearsir。 Letmejustshowyoubyaninstance。Onedayindockathome,whileloafingontheforecastlehead,Inoticedtworespectablesaltscomealong,oneamiddle-aged,competent,steadyman,evidently,theotherasmart,youngishchap。Theyreadthenameonthebowsandstoppedtolookather。Saystheelderman:\'ApseFamily。That\'sthesanguinaryfemaledog\'(I\'mputtingitinthatway)\'ofaship,Jack,thatkillsamaneveryvoyage。Iwouldn\'tsigninher——notforJoe,Iwouldn\'t。\'Andtheothersays:\'Ifsheweremine,I\'dhavehertowedonthemudandsetonfire,blammeifIwouldn\'t。\'Thenthefirstmanchimesin: \'Muchdotheycare!Menarecheap,Godknows。\' Theyoungeronespatinthewateralongside。\'Theywon\'thaveme——notfordoublewages。\' \"Theyhungaboutforsometimeandthenwalkedupthedock。HalfanhourlaterIsawthembothonourdecklookingaboutforthemate,andapparentlyveryanxioustobetakenon。Andtheywere。\" \"Howdoyouaccountforthis?\"Iasked。 \"Whatwouldyousay?\"heretorted。\"Reckless- ness!Thevanityofboastingintheeveningtoalltheirchums:\'We\'vejustshippedinthatthereApseFamily。 Blowher。Sheain\'tgoingtoscareus。\'Sheersailor- likeperversity!Asortofcuriosity。Well——alittleofallthat,nodoubt。Iputthequestiontotheminthecourseofthevoyage。Theansweroftheelderlychapwas: \"\'Amancandiebutonce。\'Theyoungerassuredmeinamockingtonethathewantedtosee\'howshewoulddoitthistime。\'ButItellyouwhat;therewasasortoffascinationaboutthebrute。\" Jermyn,whoseemedtohaveseeneveryshipintheworld,brokeinsulkily: \"Isawheronceoutofthisverywindowtowinguptheriver;agreatblackuglything,goingalonglikeabighearse。\" \"Somethingsinisteraboutherlooks,wasn\'tthere?\" saidthemanintweeds,lookingdownatoldJermynwithafriendlyeye。\"Ialwayshadasortofhorrorofher。ShegavemeabeastlyshockwhenIwasnomorethanfourteen,theveryfirstday——nay,hour——Ijoinedher。Fathercameuptoseemeoff,andwastogodowntoGravesendwithus。Iwashissecondboytogotosea。Mybigbrotherwasalreadyanofficerthen。We。 gotonboardabouteleveninthemorning,andfoundtheshipreadytodropoutofthebasin,sternfirst。Shehadnotmovedthreetimesherownlengthwhen,atalittlepluckthetuggavehertoenterthedockgates,shemadeoneofherrampagingstarts,andputsuchaweightonthecheckrope——anewsix-inchhawser——thatforwardtheretheyhadnochancetoeaseitroundintime,anditparted。Isawthebrokenendflyuphighintheair,andthenextmomentthatbrutebroughtherquarteragainstthepier-headwithajarthatstaggeredeverybodyaboutherdecks。Shedidn\'thurtherself。Notshe!Butoneoftheboysthematehadsentaloftonthemizzentodosomething,camedownonthepoop-deck——thump——rightinfrontofme。 Hewasnotmucholderthanmyself。Wehadbeengrinningateachotheronlyafewminutesbefore。Hemusthavebeenhandlinghimselfcarelessly,notexpect- ingtogetsuchajerk。Iheardhisstartledcry——Oh!—— inahightrebleashefelthimselfgoing,andlookedupintimetoseehimgolimpalloverashefell。Ough! PoorfatherwasremarkablywhiteaboutthegillswhenweshookhandsinGravesend。\'Areyouallright?\'hesays,lookinghardatme。\'Yes,father。\'\'Quitesure?\' \'Yes,father。\'\'Well,thengood-bye,myboy。\'Hetoldmeafterwardsthatforhalfawordhewouldhavecarriedmeoffhomewithhimthereandthen。Iamthebabyofthefamily——youknow,\"addedthemanintweeds,strokinghismoustachewithaningenuoussmile。 Iacknowledgedthisinterestingcommunicationbyasympatheticmurmur。Hewavedhishandcarelessly。 \"Thismighthaveutterlyspoiledachap\'snerveforgoingaloft,youknow——utterly。Hefellwithintwofeetofme,crackinghisheadonamooring-bitt。Nevermoved。Stonedead。Nicelookinglittlefellow,hewas。 Ihadjustbeenthinkingwewouldbegreatchums。 However,thatwasn\'tyettheworstthatbruteofashipcoulddo。Iservedinherthreeyearsofmytime,andthenIgottransferredtotheLucyApse,forayear。ThesailmakerwehadintheApseFamilyturnedupthere,too,andIrememberhimsayingtomeoneevening,afterwehadbeenaweekatsea:Isn\'tsheameeklittleship?\'NowonderwethoughttheLucyApseadear,meek,littleshipaftergettingclearofthatbig,rampag- ingsavagebrute。Itwaslikeheaven。Herofficersseemedtometherestfullestlotofmenonearth。TomewhohadknownnoshipbuttheApseFamily,theLucywaslikeasortofmagiccraftthatdidwhatyouwantedhertodoofherownaccord。Oneeveningwegotcaughtabackprettysharplyfromrightahead。Inabouttenminuteswehadherfullagain,sheetsaft,tacksdown,deckscleared,andtheofficerofthewatchleaningagainsttheweatherrailpeacefully。Itseemedsimplymarvelloustome。Theotherwouldhavestuckforhalf- an-hourinirons,rollingherdecksfullofwater,knock- ingthemenabout——sparscracking,bracessnapping,yardstakingcharge,andaconfoundedscaregoingonaftbecauseofherbeastlyrudder,whichshehadawayofflappingaboutfittoraiseyourhaironend。Icould- n\'tgetovermywonderfordays。 \"Well,Ifinishedmylastyearofapprenticeshipinthatjollylittleship——shewasn\'tsolittleeither,butafterthatotherheavydevilsheseemedbutaplaythingtohandle。Ifinishedmytimeandpassed;andthenjustasIwasthinkingofhavingthreeweeksofrealgoodtimeonshoreIgotatbreakfastaletteraskingmetheearliestdayIcouldbereadytojointheApseFamilyasthirdmate。Igavemyplateashovethatshotitintothemiddleofthetable;dadlookedupoverhispaper;motherraisedherhandsinastonishment,andI wentoutbare-headedintoourbitofgarden,whereI walkedroundandroundforanhour。 \"WhenIcameinagainmotherwasoutofthedining-room,anddadhadshiftedberthintohisbigarmchair。Theletterwaslyingonthemantelpiece。 \"\'It\'sverycreditabletoyoutogettheoffer,andverykindofthemtomakeit,\'hesaid。\'AndIseealsothatCharleshasbeenappointedchiefmateofthatshipforonevoyage。\' \"Therewas,overleaf,aP。S。tothateffectinMr。 Apse\'sownhandwriting,whichIhadoverlooked。 Charleywasmybigbrother。 \"Idon\'tlikeverymuchtohavetwoofmyboystogetherinoneship,\'fathergoeson,inhisdeliberate,solemnway。\'AndImaytellyouthatIwouldnotmindwritingMr。Apsealettertothateffect。\' \"Dearolddad!Hewasawonderfulfather。Whatwouldyouhavedone?Themerenotionofgoingback(andasanofficer,too),tobeworriedandbothered,andkeptonthejumpnightanddaybythatbrute,mademefeelsick。Butshewasn\'tashipyoucouldaffordtofightshyof。Besides,themostgenuineexcusecouldnotbegivenwithoutmortallyoffendingApse&Sons。 Thefirm,andIbelievethewholefamilydowntotheoldunmarriedauntsinLancashire,hadgrowndesper- atelytouchyaboutthataccursedship\'scharacter。Thiswasthecaseforanswering\'Readynow\'fromyourverydeath-bedifyouwishedtodieintheirgoodgraces。 Andthat\'spreciselywhatIdidanswer——bywire,tohaveitoveranddonewithatonce。 \"Theprospectofbeingshipmateswithmybigbrothercheeredmeupconsiderably,thoughitmademeabitanxious,too。EversinceIremembermyselfasalittlechaphehadbeenverygoodtome,andIlookeduponhimasthefinestfellowintheworld。Andsohewas。 Nobetterofficereverwalkedthedeckofamerchantship。Andthat\'safact。Hewasafine,strong,up- standing,sun-tanned,youngfellow,withhisbrownhaircurlingalittle,andaneyelikeahawk。Hewasjustsplendid。Wehadn\'tseeneachotherformanyyears,andeventhistime,thoughhehadbeeninEnglandthreeweeksalready,hehadn\'tshowedupathomeyet,buthadspenthissparetimeinSurreysomewheremak- inguptoMaggieColchester,oldCaptainColchester\'sniece。Herfather,agreatfriendofdad\'s,wasinthesugar-brokingbusiness,andCharleymadeasortofsecondhomeoftheirhouse。Iwonderedwhatmybigbrotherwouldthinkofme。Therewasasortofstern- nessaboutCharley\'sfacewhichneverleftit,notevenwhenhewaslarkinginhisratherwildfashion。 \"Hereceivedmewithagreatshoutoflaughter。 Heseemedtothinkmyjoiningasanofficerthegreatestjokeintheworld。Therewasadifferenceoftenyearsbetweenus,andIsupposeherememberedmebestinpinafores。Iwasakidoffourwhenhefirstwenttosea。 Itsurprisedmetofindhowboisteroushecouldbe。 \"\'Nowweshallseewhatyouaremadeof,\'hecried。 Andheheldmeoffbytheshoulders,andpunchedmyribs,andhustledmeintohisberth。\'Sitdown,Ned。I amgladofthechanceofhavingyouwithme。I\'llputthefinishingtouchtoyou,myyoungofficer,providingyou\'reworththetrouble。And,firstofall,getitwellintoyourheadthatwearenotgoingtoletthisbrutekillanybodythisvoyage。We\'llstopherracket。\' \"Iperceivedhewasindeadearnestaboutit。Hetalkedgrimlyoftheship,andhowwemustbecarefulandneverallowthisuglybeasttocatchusnappingwithanyofherdamnedtricks。 \"HegavemearegularlectureonspecialseamanshipfortheuseoftheApseFamily;thenchanginghistone,hebegantotalkatlarge,rattlingoffthewildest,funniestnonsense,tillmysidesachedwithlaughing。I couldseeverywellhewasabitabovehimselfwithhighspirits。Itcouldn\'tbebecauseofmycoming。Nottothatextent。But,ofcourse,Iwouldn\'thavedreamtofaskingwhatwasthematter。Ihadaproperrespectformybigbrother,Icantellyou。Butitwasallmadeplainenoughadayortwoafterwards,whenIheardthatMissMaggieColchesterwascomingforthevoy- age。Unclewasgivingherasea-tripforthebenefitofherhealth。 \"Idon\'tknowwhatcouldhavebeenwrongwithherhealth。Shehadabeautifulcolour,andadeuceofalotoffairhair。Shedidn\'tcarearapforwind,orrain,orspray,orsun,orgreenseas,oranything。Shewasablue-eyed,jollygirloftheverybestsort,butthewayshecheekedmybigbrotherusedtofrightenme。I alwaysexpectedittoendinanawfulrow。However,nothingdecisivehappenedtillafterwehadbeeninSydneyforaweek。Oneday,inthemen\'sdinnerhour,Charleystickshisheadintomycabin。Iwasstretchedoutonmybackonthesettee,smokinginpeace。 \"\'Comeashorewithme,Ned,\'hesays,inhiscurtway。 \"Ijumpedup,ofcourse,andawayafterhimdownthegangwayandupGeorgeStreet。Hestrodealonglikeagiant,andIathiselbow,panting。Itwascon- foundedlyhot。\'Whereonearthareyourushingmeto,Charley?\'Imadeboldtoask。 \"\'Here,\'hesays。 \"\'Here\'wasajeweller\'sshop。Icouldn\'timaginewhathecouldwantthere。Itseemedasortofmadfreak。Hethrustsundermynosethreerings,whichlookedverytinyonhisbig,brownpalm,growlingout—— \"\'ForMaggie!Which?\' \"Igotakindofscareatthis。Icouldn\'tmakeasound,butIpointedattheonethatsparkledwhiteandblue。Heputitinhiswaistcoatpocket,paidforitwithalotofsovereigns,andboltedout。WhenwegotonboardIwasquiteoutofbreath。\'Shakehands,oldchap,\'Igaspedout。Hegavemeathumpontheback。 \'Givewhatordersyouliketotheboatswainwhenthehandsturn-to,\'sayshe;\'Iamoffdutythisafternoon。\' \"Thenhevanishedfromthedeckforawhile,butpresentlyhecameoutofthecabinwithMaggie,andthesetwowentoverthegangwaypublicly,beforeallhands,goingforawalktogetheronthatawful,blazinghotday,withcloudsofdustflyingabout。Theycamebackafterafewhourslookingverystaid,butdidn\'tseemtohavetheslightestideawheretheyhadbeen。 Anyway,that\'stheanswertheybothmadetoMrs。 Colchester\'squestionattea-time。 \"Anddidn\'tsheturnonCharley,withhervoicelikeanoldnightcabman\'s!\'Rubbish。Don\'tknowwhereyou\'vebeen!Stuffandnonsense。You\'vewalkedthegirloffherlegs。Don\'tdoitagain。\' \"It\'ssurprisinghowmeekCharleycouldbewiththatoldwoman。Onlyononeoccasionhewhisperedtome,\'I\'mjollygladsheisn\'tMaggie\'saunt,exceptbymarriage。That\'snosortofrelationship。\'ButI thinkheletMaggiehavetoomuchofherownway。 Shewashoppingalloverthatshipinheryachtingskirtandaredtamo\'shanterlikeabrightbirdonadeadblacktree。Theoldsaltsusedtogrintothemselveswhentheysawhercomingalong,andofferedtoteachherknotsorsplices。Ibelieveshelikedthemen,forCharley\'ssake,Isuppose。 \"Asyoumayimagine,thefiendishpropensitiesofthatcursedshipwereneverspokenofonboard。Notinthecabin,atanyrate。Onlyonceonthehome- wardpassageCharleysaid,incautiously,somethingaboutbringingallhercrewhomethistime。CaptainColchesterbegantolookuncomfortableatonce,andthatsilly,hard-bittenoldwomanflewoutatCharleyasthoughhehadsaidsomethingindecent。Iwasquiteconfoundedmyself;astoMaggie,shesatcompletelymystified,openingherblueeyesverywide。Ofcourse,beforeshewasadayoldershewormeditalloutofme。 Shewasaverydifficultpersontolieto。 \"\'Howawful,\'shesaid,quitesolemn。\'Somanypoorfellows。Iamgladthevoyageisnearlyover。I won\'thaveamoment\'speaceaboutCharleynow。\' \"IassuredherCharleywasallright。IttookmorethanthatshipknewtogetoveraseamanlikeCharley。 Andsheagreedwithme。 \"NextdaywegotthetugoffDungeness;andwhenthetow-ropewasfastCharleyrubbedhishandsandsaidtomeinanundertone—— \"\'We\'vebaffledher,Ned。\' \'\"Lookslikeit,\'Isaid,withagrinathim。Itwasbeautifulweather,andtheseaassmoothasamillpond。 Wewentuptheriverwithoutashadowoftroubleexceptonce,whenoffHoleHaven,thebrutetookasuddensheerandnearlyhadabargeanchoredjustclearofthefairway。ButIwasaft,lookingafterthesteer- ing,andshedidnotcatchmenappingthattime。 Charleycameuponthepoop,lookingveryconcerned。 \'Closeshave,\'sayshe。 \"\'Nevermind,Charley,\'Ianswered,cheerily。 \'You\'vetamedher。\' \"Weweretotowrightuptothedock。TheriverpilotboardedusbelowGravesend,andthefirstwordsIheardhimsaywere:\'Youmayjustaswelltakeyourportanchorinboardatonce,Mr。Mate。\' \"ThishadbeendonewhenIwentforward。IsawMaggieontheforecastleheadenjoyingthebustleandIbeggedhertogoaft,butshetooknonoticeofme,ofcourse。ThenCharley,whowasverybusywiththeheadgear,caughtsightofherandshoutedinhisbiggestvoice:\'Getofftheforecastlehead,Maggie。You\'reinthewayhere。\'Forallanswershemadeafunnyfaceathim,andIsawpoorCharleyturnaway,hidingasmile。 Shewasflushedwiththeexcitementofgettinghomeagain,andherblueeyesseemedtosnapelectricsparksasshelookedattheriver。Acollierbrighadgoneroundjustaheadofus,andourtughadtostopherenginesinahurrytoavoidrunningintoher。 \"Inamoment,asisusuallythecase,alltheshippinginthereachseemedtogetintoahopelesstangle。A schoonerandaketchgotupasmallcollisionalltothemselvesrightinthemiddleoftheriver。Itwasexcitingtowatch,and,meantime,ourtugremainedstopped。Anyothershipthanthatbrutecouldhavebeencoaxedtokeepstraightforacoupleofminutes—— butnotshe!Herheadfelloffatonce,andshebegantodriftdown,takinghertugalongwithher。Inoticedaclusterofcoastersatanchorwithinaquarterofamileofus,andIthoughtIhadbetterspeaktothepilot。 \'Ifyoulethergetamongstthatlot,\'Isaid,quietly,\'shewillgrindsomeofthemtobitsbeforewegetheroutagain。\' \"\'Don\'tIknowher!\'crieshe,stampinghisfootinaperfectfury。Andheoutwithhiswhistletomakethatbotheredtuggettheship\'sheadupagainasquickaspossible。Heblewlikemad,wavinghisarmtoport,andpresentlywecouldseethatthetug\'sengineshadbeensetgoingahead。Herpaddleschurnedthewater,butitwasasifshehadbeentryingtotowarock——shecouldn\'tgetaninchoutofthatship。 Againthepilotblewhiswhistle,andwavedhisarmtoport。Wecouldseethetug\'spaddlesturningfasterandfasteraway,broadonourbow。