Sheconsideredthis.
\"Yes,itissurprising,\"sheadmitted,\"butit\'strue.Iwassorryforhim,butIadmiredhim.Iwasnotonlyimpressedbyhiscourageintakingchargeofme,butalsobythetrustandaffectionthework-peopleshowed.Hemustbeagoodman,howevermistakenhemaybeinthemethodsheemploys.Andlifeiscrueltothosepeople.\"
\"Lifeis-life,\"Iobserved.\"NeitheryounorInorKrebsisabletochangeit.\"
\"Hashecomeheretopractice?\"sheasked,afteramoment.
\"Yes.Doyouwantmetoinvitehimtodinner?\"andseeingthatshedidnotreplyIcontinued:\"InspiteofmyexplanationIsupposeyouthink,becauseKrebsdefendedthemanGalligan,thatamonstrousinjusticehasbeendone.\"
\"Thatisunworthyofyou,\"shesaid,bendingoverherstitch.
Ibegantopacetheroomagain,aswasmyhabitwhenoverwrought.
\"Well,Iwasgoingtotellyouaboutthisaffairifyouhadnotforestalledmebymentioningityourself.Itisn\'tpleasanttobevilifiedbyrascalswhomakecapitaloutofvilification,andamanhasarighttoexpectsomesympathyfromhiswife.\"
\"DidIeverdenyyouthat,Hugh?\"sheasked.\"Onlyyoudon\'teverseemtoneedit,towantit.\"
\"Andtherearethings,\"Ipursued,\"thingsinaman\'sprovincethatawomanoughttoacceptfromherhusband,thingswhichintheverynatureofthecaseshecanknownothingabout.\"
\"Butawomanmustthinkforherself,\"shedeclared.\"Sheshouldn\'tbecomeamereautomaton,——andthesequestionsinvolvesomuch!Peoplearediscussingthem,themagazinesandperiodicalsarebeginningtotakethemup.\"
Istaredather,somewhatappalledbythispointofview.Therehad,indeed,beensignsofitsdevelopmentbeforenow,butIhadnotheededthem.AndforthefirsttimeIbeheldMaudeinanewlight.
\"Oh,it\'snotthatIdon\'ttrustyou,\"shecontinued,\"I\'mopentoconviction,butImustbeconvinced.YourexplanationofthisGalligancaseseemsasensibleone,althoughit\'sdepressing.ButlifeishardanddepressingsometimesI\'vecometorealizethat.Iwanttothinkoverwhatyou\'vesaid,Iwanttotalkoveritsomemore.Whywon\'tyoutellmemoreofwhatyouaredoing?Ifyouonlywouldconfideinme——asyouhavenow!Ican\'thelpseeingthatwearegrowingfartherandfartherapart,thatbusiness,yourcareer,istakingallofyouandleavingmenothing.\"Shefaltered,andwentonagain.\"It\'sdifficulttotellyouthis——younevergivemethechance.Andit\'snotformysakealone,butforyours,too.Youaregrowingmoreandmoreself-centred,surroundingyourselfwithahardshell.Youdon\'trealizeit,butTomnoticesit,Perrynoticesit,ithurtsthem,it\'sthattheycomplainof.Hugh!\"shecriedappealingly,sensingmyresentment,forestallingthewordsofdefencereadyonmylips.\"Iknowthatyouarebusy,thatmanymendependonyou,itisn\'tthatI\'mnotproudofyouandyoursuccess,butyoudon\'tunderstandwhatawomancraves,——shedoesn\'twantonlytobeagoodhousekeeper,agoodmother,butshewantstosharealittle,atanyrate,inthelifeofherhusband,inhistroublesaswellasinhissuccesses.Shewantstobeofsomelittleuse,ofsomelittlehelptohim.\"
Myfeelingswerereducedtoamedley.
\"Butyouareahelptome——agreathelp,\"Iprotested.
Sheshookherhead.\"IwishIwere,\"shesaid.
Itsuddenlyoccurredtomethatshemightbe.Iwassoftened,andalarmedbythespectacleshehadrevealedofthewideningbreachbetweenus.Ilaidmyhandonhershoulder.
\"Well,I\'lltrytodobetter,Maude.\"
Shelookedupatme,questioninglyyetgratefully,throughamistoftears.Butherreply——whateveritmighthavebeen——wasforestalledbythesoundofshoutsandlaughterinthehallway.Shesprangupandrantothedoor.
\"It\'sthechildren,\"sheexclaimed,\"they\'vecomehomefromSusan\'sparty!\"
ItbeginsindeedtolookasifIwerewritingthisnarrativeupsidedown,forIhavesaidnothingaboutchildren.PerhapsonereasonforthisomissionisthatIdidnotreallyappreciatethem,thatIfounditimpossibletotakethesameminuteinterestinthemasTom,forinstance,whowas,apparently,notcontentalonewiththesixwhichhepossessed,buthadadoptedmine.Oneofthem,littleSarah,said\"UncleTom\"before\"Father.\"IdonotmeantosaythatIhadnotoccasionalmomentsoftendernesstowardthem,buttheywereoutofmythoughtsmuchofthetime.Ihaveoftenwondered,since,howtheyregardedme;how,intheirlittleminds,theydefinedtherelationship.Generally,whenIarrivedhomeintheeveningIlikedtositdownbeforemystudyfireandreadtheafternoonnewspapersoramagazine;butoccasionallyIwentatoncetothenurseryforafewmoments,tosurveywithcomplacencythemedleyoftoysonthefloor,andtokissallthree.Theyreceivedmycaresseswithacertainshyness——thetwoyoungerones,atleast,asthoughtheywereatalosstoplacemeasafactorintheestablishment.TheytumbledovereachothertogreetMaude,andevenTom.IfIwereanenigmatothem,whatmusttheyhavethoughtofhim?SometimesIwoulddiscoverhimonthenurseryfloor,withoneortwoofhisownchildren,buildingtowersandcastlesandrailroadstations,orfortstobeattackedanddemolishedbyregimentsofleadsoldiers.Hewasgrowingcomfortable-looking,ifnotexactlystout;prematurelypaternal,oddlywillingtorenouncethefiercerjoysoflife,thejoysofacquisition,ofconquest,ofyouth.
\"You\'dbettercomehomewithme,Chickabiddy,\"hewouldsay,\"thatfatherofyoursdoesn\'tappreciateyou.He\'stoobusygettingrich.\"
\"Chickabiddy,\"washisnameforlittleSarah.Halfofthenamestucktoher,andwhenshewasolderwecalledherBiddy.
Shewouldgazeathimquestioningly,hereyeslikeblueflowercups,astrangelittlemixtureofsolemnityandbubblingmirth,ofshynessandimpulsiveness.Shehadfatlegsthatcreasedabovethetopsoftheabsurdlittlebootsthatlookedtobetootight;sometimessherolledandtumbledinanecstasyofabandon,andagainshewouldsitmotionless,asthoughabsorbedindreams.Herhairwaslikecornsilkinthesun,twistingupintosoftcurlsafterherbath,whenshesatrosilypresidingoverhersuppertable.
AsIlookbackoverherearlyinfancy,IrealizethatIlovedher,althoughitisimpossibleformetosayhowmuchofthisloveisretrospective.WhyIwasnotmadabouthereveryhourofthedayisapuzzletomenow.Why,indeed,wasInotmadaboutallthreeofthem?
ThereweremomentswhenIheldandkissedthem,whensomethingwithinmemelted:momentswhenIwasawayfromthem,andthoughtofthem.Butthesemomentsdidnotlast.Thesomethingwithinmehardenedagain,I
becameindifferent,myfamilywaswipedoutofmyconsciousnessasthoughithadneverexisted.
TherewasMatthew,forinstance,theoldest.Whenhearrived,hewastoMaudeanever-endingmiracle,shewouldhavehiscribbroughtintoherroom,andIwouldfindherleaningoverthebedside,gazingathimwitharaptexpressionbeyondmycomprehension.Tomehewasjustabrick-redmorselofhumanity,allfoldsandwrinkles,andnotatallremarkableinanyway.Maudeusedtoannoymebygettingoutofbedinthemiddleofthenightwhenhecried,andatsuchtimesIwasapttowonderattheoddtrickthelife-forcehadplayedme,andaskmyselfwhyIgotmarriedatall.Itwasaqueermethodofcarryingontherace.Lateron,Ibegantotakeacursoryinterestinhim,towatchforsignsinhimofcertaincharacteristicsofmyownyouthwhich,inthephilosophyofmymanhood,I
hadcometoregardasdefects.Anditdisturbedmesomewhattoseethesesignsappear.IwishedhimtobewhatIhadbecomebyforceofwill——afighter.Buthewasasensitivechild,anxiousforapproval;notrobust,thoughspiritualratherthandelicate;evenincomparativeinfancyhecaredmoreforbooksthantoys,andhisgreatestjoywasinbeingreadto.Inspiteofthesetraits——perhapsbecauseofthem——therewasasympathybetweenus.Fromthetimethathecouldtalkthechildseemedtounderstandme.OccasionallyIsurprisedhimgazingatmewithacertainwistfullookthatcomesbacktomeasIwrite.
Moreton,TomusedtocallAlexandertheGreatbecausehewasafighterfromthecradle,beatinghiselderbrother,tooconsideratetostrikeback,andlikewise——whenopportunityoffered——hissister;andappropriatingtheirtoys.Aself-sufficient,doughtyyoungman,withtheroundheadthatwithstandsmanyblows,takingbynaturetocompetitionandbuccaneeringingeneral.IdidnotlovehimhalfsomuchasIdidMatthew——ifsuchintermittentemotionsasminemaybecalledlove.Itwasastandingjokeofmine——whichMaudestronglyresented——thatMoretonresembledCousinGeorgeofElkington.
Imbuedwiththehighestambitionofmytime,Ihadsetmybarqueonagreatcircle,andalmostbeforeIrealizeditthebarquewasburdenedwithawifeandfamilyandthesteeringhadinsensiblybecomemoredifficult;forMaudecarednothingaboutthedestination,andwhenItookanyhandoffthewheelourshipshowedatendencytomakeforaquietharbour.Thusthesocialinitiative,whichIbelievedshouldhavebeenthewoman\'s,wasthrustbackonme.Itwasalmostincredible,yetindisputable,inadaywhenmostAmericanwomenwerecreditedwithacravingforsocialambitionthatI,ofallmen,shouldhavemarriedawifeinwhomthecravingwaswhollyabsent!Shemighthavehadwhatotherwomenwouldhavegiventheirsoulsfor.ThereweremanyreasonswhyIwishedhertotakewhatIdeemedherproperplaceinthecommunityasmywife——notthatIcaredforwhatiscalledsocietyinthenarrowsense;withme,itwasalogicalpartofabroaderschemeoflife;anauxiliaryratherthananessential,butaneedfulauxiliary;ameansofdignifyingandadorningthepositionIwastaking.Notonlythat,butI
felttheneedofintercourse——ofintercourseofalighterandmoreconvivialnaturewithmenandwomenwhosawlifeasIsawit.Intheeveningswhenwedidnotgooutintothatworldourcityaffordedennuitookpossessionofme:Ihadneverlearnedtocareforbooks,Ihadnoresourcesoutsideofmyprofession,andwhenIwasnotworkingonsomelegalproblemIdawdledoverthenewspapersandwenttobed.Idon\'tmeantoimplythatourexistence,outsideofourcontinuedintimacywiththePetersesandtheBlackwoods,wassociallyisolated.WegavelittledinnersthatMaudecarriedoutwithskillandtaste;butitwasIwhosuggestedthem;wewentouttootherdinners,sometimestoNancy\'s——
thoughwesawlessandlessofher——sometimestootherhouses.ButMaudehadgivenevidenceofdomestictastesandadisinclinationforgaietythatthosewhoentertainedmorewerenotslowtosense.Ishouldhavelikedtotakealargerhouse,butIfeltthefutilityofsuggestingit;
thechildrenwerestillsmall,andshewasoccupiedwiththem.MeanwhileIbeheld,andattimeswithconsiderableirritation,thesocialworldchanging,growinglargerandmoresignificant,amoreimportantfunctionofthathigherphaseofAmericanexistencethenewcenturyseemeddefinitelytohaveinitiated.AsegregativeprocesswasawaytowhichMaudewaswhollyindifferent.Ourcitywasthrowingoffitssocialconservatism;wealth(whichimpliedabilityandsuperiority)wasplayingagreaterpart,entertainmentsweremoreluxurious,linesmorestrictlydrawn.Wehadanelaboratecountryclubforthosewhocouldaffordexpensiveamusements.MuchofthistransformationhadbeenduetotheinitiativeandleadershipofNancyDurrett
Greatandsuddenwealth,however,ifcombinedwithobscureantecedentsandquestionablequalifications,wasstilllookeduponaskance.InspiteofthefactthatAdolfSchererhad\"putusonthemap,\"thefamilyofthegreatiron-masterstillremainedoutsideofthesocialpale.Hehimselfmighthaveenteredhaditnotbeenforhiswife,whowassupposedtobe\"queer,\"whoremainedathomeinherhouseoppositeGallatinParkandmadelittleGermancakes,——ahugehousewhichanunknownarchitecthadtakenunusualpainstomakepretentiousandhideous,foritwasRhenish,MoorishandVictorianbyturns.Itsgeometricgroundsmatchedthoseofthepark,itselfamonumenttobadtasteinlandscape.Theneighbourhoodwashighlyrespectable,andinhabitedbyfamiliesofGermanextraction.
Thereweretwoflaxen-haireddaughterswhohadjustgraduatedfromanexpensiveboarding-schoolinNewYork,wheretheyhadreceivedthepolishneedfulforfuturecareers.Butthecareerswerenotforthcoming.
IwasthrownconstantlywithAdolfScherer;Ihadearnedhisgratitude,I
hadbecomenecessarytohim.ButafterthegreatcoupwherebyhehadfulfilledMr.Watling\'sprophecyandbecomethechieffactorinourbusinessworldhebegantoshowsignsofdiscontent,ofanirritabilitythatseemedforeigntohischaracter,andthatpuzzledme.Oneday,however,Istumbleduponthecauseofthisfermentation,towonderthatI
hadnotdiscovereditbefore.InmanywaysAdolfSchererwasachild.
WeweresittingintheBoyneClub.
\"Money——yes!\"heexclaimed,aproposofsomedemandmadeuponhimbyacharitablesociety.\"Theycometomeformymoney——thereisalwaysScherer,theysay.Hewillmakeupthedeficitinthehospitals.Butwhatisittheydoforme?Nothing.Dotheyinvitemetotheirhouses,totheirparties?\"
Thiswaswhathewanted,then,——socialrecognition.Isaidnothing,butIsawmyopportunity:Ihadtheclew,now,toacertainattitudehehadadoptedoflatetowardme,anattitudeofreproach;asthough,inreturnforhismanyfavourstome,thereweresomethingIhadleftundone.AndwhenIwenthomeIaskedMaudetocallonMrs.Scherer.
\"OnMrs.Scherer!\"sherepeated.
\"Yes,Iwantyoutoinvitethemtodinner.\"Theproposalseemedtotakeawayherbreath.\"Ioweherhusbandagreatdeal,andIthinkhefeelshurtthatthewivesofthemenheknowsdowntownhaven\'ttakenuphisfamily.\"Ifeltthatitwouldnotbewise,withMaude,toannouncemyratheramazingdiscoveryoftheiron-master\'ssocialambitions.
\"But,Hugh,theymustbeveryhappy,theyhavetheirfriends.Andafterallthistimewouldn\'titseemlikeanintrusion?\"
\"Idon\'tthinkso,\"Isaid,\"I\'msureitwouldpleasehim,andthem.Youknowhowkindhe\'sbeentous,howhesentusEastinhisprivatecarlastyear.\"
\"OfcourseI\'llgoifyouwishit,ifyou\'resuretheyfeelthatway.\"
Shedidmakethecall,thatveryweek,andsomewhattomysurprisereportedthatshelikedMrs.Schererandthedaughters:Maude\'slikesanddislikes,needlesstosay,werenotgovernedbymattersofpolicy.
\"Youwereright,Hugh,\"sheinformedme,almostwithenthusiasm,\"theydidseemlonely.Andtheyweresogladtoseeme,itwasratherpathetic.Mr.Scherer,itseems,hadtalkedtothemagreatdealaboutyou.TheywantedtoknowwhyIhadn\'tcomebefore.Thatwasratherembarrassing.Fortunatelytheydidn\'tgivemetimetotalk,Ineverheardpeopletalkastheydo.TheyallkissedmewhenIwentaway,andcamedownthestepswithme.AndMrs.Schererwentintotheconservatoryandpickedahugebouquet.Thereitis,\"shesaid,laughingly,pointingtoseveralvases.\"IseparatedthecoloursaswellasIcouldwhenIgothome.Wehadcoffee,andthemostdeliciousGermancakesintheTurkishroom,ortheMoorishroom,whicheveritis.I\'msureIshan\'tbeabletoeatanythingmorefordays.Whendoyouwishtohavethemfordinner?\"
\"Well,\"Isaid,\"weoughttohavetimetogettherightpeopletomeetthem.We\'llaskNancyandHam.\"
Maudeopenedhereyes.
\"Nancy!DoyouthinkNancywouldlikethem?\"
\"I\'mgoingtogiveherachance,anyway,\"Ireplied
Itwas,insomeways,amemorabledinner.Idon\'tknowwhatIexpectedinMrs.Scherer——fromMaude\'sdescriptionabenevolentandsomewhatstupid,blue-eyedGermanwoman,ofpeasantextraction.Therecouldbenodoubtaboutthepeasantextraction,butwhenshehobbledintoourlittleparlourwiththeaidofastout,gold-headedcaneshedominatedit.Herverylamenessaddedtoadistinctionthatevinceditselfinadozenways.
Hernosewashooked,hercolourhigh,——despitetheyearsinSteelville,——
herpeculiarcostumeheightenedtheeffectofherpersonality;herfire-
litblackeyesbespokeaspiritaccustomedtorule,andinsteadofbeinganaspirantforsocialhonours,sheseemedtoconferthem.Conversationceasedatherentrance.
\"I\'msorrywearelate,mydear,\"shesaid,asshegreetedMaudeaffectionately,\"butwehavefartocome.Andthisisyourhusband!\"
sheexclaimed,asIwasintroduced.Shescrutinizedme.\"Ihaveheardsomethingofyou,Mr.Paret.Youaresmart.ShallItellyouthesmartestthingyoueverdid?\"ShepattedMaude\'sshoulder.\"Whenyoumarriedyourwife——thatwasit.Ihavefalleninlovewithher.Ifyoudonotknowit,Itellyou.\"
Next,Nancywasintroduced.
\"SoyouareMrs.HambletonDurrett?\"
Nancyacknowledgedheridentitywithasmile,butthenextremarkwasabombshell.
\"Theleaderofsociety.\"
\"Alas!\"exclaimedNancy,\"Ihavebeenaccusedofmanyterriblethings.\"
Theirglancesmet.Nancy\'swasamused,baffling,likeasparkinamber.
Each,initsway,wasredoubtable.Agreatercontrastbetweentwowomencouldscarcelyhavebeenimagined.Itwaswellsaid(andnotsnobbishly)
thatgenerationshadbeenrequiredtomakeNancy\'sfigure:sheworeadressofbluesheen,thelightplayingonitsripples;andasshestood,apparentlywhollyatease,lookingdownatthewifeofAdolfScherer,sheremindedmeofanexpertswordsmanwho,withremarkableskill,waskeepingatoopressinganddeterminedaspirantatarm\'slength.IwaskeenlyawarethatMaudedidnotpossessthisgift,andIrealizedforthefirsttimesomethingofthesimilaritybetweenNancy\'scareerandmyown.
She,too,inherfemininesphere,exercised,andsubtly,apowerinwhichhumanpassionsweredeeplyinvolved.
IfNancyDurrettsymbolizedaristocracy,establishedorderandprestige,whatdidMrs.Schererrepresent?Notdemocracy,mobrule——certainly.
ThestockyGermanpeasantwomanwithhertightlydrawnhairandheavyjewelsseemedgrotesquelytoembodysomethingthatultimatelywouldhaveitsway,alustyandterribleforceintheinterestsofwhichmyownserviceswereenlisted;towhichtheoldAmericanelementinbusinessandindustry,themalecounterpartofNancyWillett,hadalreadysuccumbed.
Andnowitwasabouttostormthefemininefastnesses!Ibeheldawomanwhohadcometothiscountrywithashawlaverherheadtransformedintoanewspeciesofduchess,sureofherself,scorningthedelicateeuphemismsinwhichFancy\'skindwerewonttorefertoasocialrealm,thatwasnolessrealbecauseitsboundarieshadnotdefinitelybeendefined.Sheheldherstickfirmly,andgaveNancyanindomitablelook.
\"Iwantyoutomeetmydaughters.Gretchen,Anna,comehereandbeintroducedtoMrs.Durrett.\"
ItwasnotwithoutcuriosityIwatchedtheseofthesecondgenerationastheymadetheirbows,notedthedifferentiationinthetypeforwhichanAmericanenvironmentanda\"finishingschool\"hadbeenresponsible.
GretchenandAnnahadlearned——incrises,suchasthepresent——torestrainthesuperabundantvitalitytheyhadinherited.Iftheircheekboneswerealittletoohigh,theirDelftblueeyesalittletoosmall,theircolourwasoftheproverbialrose-leavesandcream.GeneHollister\'sdifficultywastoknowwhichtomarry.Theywerenicegirls,——ofthattherecouldbenodoubt;therewasnofalsemodestyintheirattitudetoward\"society\";nordidtheypretend——assomanysillypeopledid,thattheywerenotattemptingtogetanywhereinparticular,thatitwaslessdesirabletobeinthecentrethanonthedubiousouterwalks.They,too,weresogladtomeetMrs.Durrett.
Nancy\'seyestwinkledastheypassedon.
\"YouseewhatIhaveletyouinfor?\"Isaid.
\"MydearHugh,\"shereplied,\"soonerorlaterweshouldhavehadtofacethemanyhow.Ihaverecognizedthatforsometime.Withtheirmoney,andMr.Scherer\'sprestige,andthewillofthatladywiththestick,inafewyearsweshouldhavehadnothingtosay.Why,she\'safemaleNapoleon.Hilda\'sthemanofthefamily.\"
Afterthat,NancyinvariablyreferredtoMrs.SchererasHilda.
IfMrs.Schererwasasurprisetous,herhusbandwasastillgreaterone;andIhaddifficultyinrecognizingtheAdolfSchererwhocametoourdinnerpartyasthepersonageofthebusinessworldbeforewhomlessermenwerewonttocringe.Heseemedrathermysteriouslytohaveshedthatpersonality;becomeanawkward,ingratiating,rathertooexuberant,ordinarymanwithamarkedGermanaccent.FromtimetotimeI
foundmyselfspeculatinguneasilyonthisphenomenonasIglanceddownthetableathisgreattorso,whitewaist-coatedfortheoccasion.Hewasplainly\"makingup\"toNancy,andtoMrs.Ogilvy,whosatoppositehim.Onthewhole,theatmosphereofourentertainmentwasratherelectric.\"Hilda\"waschieflyresponsibleforthis;herfranknesswasofthebreath-takingkind.Farfromattemptingtohideorignorethestrugglebywhichsheandherhusbandhadattainedtheirpresentposition,shereferredwiththeutmostnaivetetoincidentsinhercareer,whilethewholetablepausedtolisten.
\"Beforewehadacarriage,yes,itwashardformetogetabout.Ihadtobehelpedbytheconductorsintothestreetcars.IbrokemyhipwhenwelivedinSteelville,andthedoctorwasanumbskull.Heshouldbeputinprison,iswhatItellAdolf.Iwasstandingonaclothes-horse,whenitfell.Ihadmuchwashingtodointhosedays.\"
\"And——cannothingbedone,Mrs.Scherer?\"askedLeonardDickinson,sympathetically.
\"Foranoldwoman?Iamfifty-five.Ihavehadmanydoctors.Iwouldputthemallinprison.HowmuchwasityoupaidDr.Stickney,inNewYork,Adolf?Fivethousanddollars?Andhedidnothing——nothing.I\'dratherbepooragain,andwork.Butitiswelltomakethebestofit.\"
\"Yourgrandfatherwasafineman,Mr.Durrett,\"sheinformedHambleton.
\"Itisapityforyou,Ithink,thatyoudonothavetowork.\"
Ham,whosatonherotherside,wasamused.
\"Mygrandfatherdidenoughworkforbothofus,\"hesaid.
\"IfIhadbeenyourgrandfather,Iwouldhavestartedyouinpuddling,\"
sheobserved,assheeyedwithdisapprovalthefillingofhisthirdglassofchampagne.\"Ithinkthereistoomuchgaylife,toomuchgamesforrichyoungmennowadays.YouwillforgivemeforsayingwhatIthinktoyoungmen?\"
\"I\'llforgiveyoufornotbeingmygrandfather,atanyrate,\"repliedHam,withunaccustomedwit.
Shegazedathimwithgrimhumour.
\"ItisbadforyouIamnot,\"shedeclared.
Therewasnogainsayingher.Whatcanbedonewithaladywhowillnotrecognizethatmoralityisnotdiscussed,andthatpersonalitiesaretabooedsavebetweenintimates.HildawasapersonageaswellasaTartar.Laws,conventions,usages——toalltheseshewouldconformwhenitpleasedher.Shewouldhavemadeanadmirableinquisitorialjudge,andquiteasadmirableasicknurse.Ararecriminallawyer,likewise,waswastedinher.Shewasoneofthoseindividuals,Iperceived,whoseloyaltiesdominatethem;andwho,inbehalfofthoseloyalties,carrychipsontheirshoulders.
\"ItisalongtimethatIhavebeenwantingtomeetyou,\"sheinformedme.\"Youaresmart.\"
Ismiled,yetIwasinclinedtoresentheruseoftheword,thoughIwasbynomeanssureoftheshadeofmeaningshemeanttoputintoit.I
had,indeed,anuneasysenseofthescantinessofmyfundofhumourtomeetandturnsuchasituation;forIwasexperiencing,now,withher,thesamequeerfeelingIhadknowninmyyouthinthepresenceofCousinRobertBreck——thesuspicionthatthisextraordinarypersonsawthroughme.Itwasasthoughsheheldupamirrorandcompelledmetolookatmysoulfeatures.Itriedtoassuremyselfthatthemirrorwasdistorted.
Ilost,nevertheless,thesurenessoftouchthatcomesfromtheconvictionofbeingallofapiece.Shecontrivedtoresolvemeagainintoconflictingelements.Iwas,forthemoment,nolongertheself-
confidentandtriumphantyoungattorneyaccustomedtocarryallbeforehim,tocommandrespectandadmiration,butacomplicatedbeingwhoseunityhadsuddenlybeensplit.IglancedaroundthetableatOgilvy,atDickinson,atRalphHambleton.Thesemenwerefunctioningtruly.ButwasI?IfIwerenot,mightnotthisbethereasonforthelackofsynthesis——ofwhichIwasabruptlythoughvaguelyawarebetweenmyprofessionallife,mydomesticrelationships,andmyrelationshipswithfriends.Theloyaltyofthewomanbesidemestruckmeforciblyasasupremetrait.Whereshehadgiven,shedidnotwithdraw.ShehadconferreditinstantlyonMaude.DidIfeelthatloyaltytowardsasinglehumanbeing?towardsMaudeherself——mywife?oreventowardsNancy?Ipulledmyselftogether,andresolvedtogivehercreditforusingtheword\"smart\"initsunobjectionablesense.Afterall;Dickenshadsousedit.
\"Alawyermustneedsknowsomethingofwhatheisabout,Mrs.Scherer,ifheistobeemployedbysuchamanasyourhusband,\"Ireplied.
Herblackeyessnappedwithpleasure.
\"Ah,Isupposethatisso,\"sheagreed.\"IknewhewasagreatmanwhenImarriedhim,andthatwasbeforeMr.NathanielDurrettfounditout.\"
\"Butsurelyyoudidnotthink,inthosedays,thathewouldbeasbigashehasbecome?ThathewouldnotonlybepresidentoftheBoyneIronWorks,butofaBoyneIronWorksthathasexceededMr.Durrett\'swildestdreams.\"
Sheshookherheadcomplacently.
\"DoyouknowwhatItoldhimwhenhemarriedme?Isaid,\'Adolf,itisapityyouareborninGermany.\'Andwhenheaskedmewhy,ItoldhimthatsomedayhemighthavebeenPresidentoftheUnitedStates.\"
\"Well,thatwon\'tbeagreatdeprivationtohim,\"Iremarked.\"Mr.
